blueberry2015

Argh, hate this time of year! All the hype of christmas and new year is over, I am sooo short of money, my depression has crept back in too, thankfully its not toooo bad but there. Just feel fed up and miserable!!

Thoughts of drinking have returned, I havent acted on it but know that the reason why it has returned is because it will change how I feel right now, I dont want to feel low, or miserable, skint and depressed, but I neither want to feel regret, shame and remorse that drinking gives either.

I guess I need to up my game, get to more meetings and force myself on out there.

Anyone with me on this?

I keep reminding myself this too shall pass, and it does. Could do with a pick me up tbh, not drugs not alcohol but I guess something to lift my mood.

Argh! Putting this out there because I know I have to!

Midwest1981

I felt like that a few weeks ago. I felt down and there really wasn't a major reason why. I am glad I didn't drink. It did pass and now I feel really good.

exercise would probably help or planning a fun day out. For some reason tea really picks me up too. I hope you feel better soon.

blueberry2015

Its hard to motivate yourself tho when depression kicks in, procastination is my biggest problem lol. I need a meeting, havent had one since Wednesday and get it out there I think. Got service tomorrow thank god so that will make me go out of the house, Im starting to see how and why AA service is so bloody important now. X

Dee74

I think keeping active is important.

If that's a monumental task or too much to contemplate (and I've been there) its probably time to get some help and see your doctor?

D

MythOfSisyphus

I feel you, BB! I'm a chef so the the last few months of the year are really busy with every moment building up to the crescendo of New Year's Eve. But now, after months of every night being 'special' (eg Xmas parties, tons of big reservations, etc) now it's just blah again. All the build up, the holiday magic, the raves from customers over the food...then it just ends in Jan.

V-Day is huge but it's a way off. The weather has been miserably cold (-8 F right now) and I'm tired and ready for some time off. Tonite was the worst day of work I've had in many years and I will confess, a little part of me thought a few bottles of wine would take the edge off.

But I'm not gonna go there. Drinking made my life miserable so I'm not gonna give it a chance to finish me off.

Delilah1

Glad you came here and posted instead. Sounds like you will have a little more free time between now and Valentine's Day. Perfect time to volunteer, start a new hobby, take a class, hit the gym...

You mentioned you were waiting for a meeting, how often do you go? Is there something else you can add to your recovery to help flip how you are feeling?

Berrybean

Yes. My sponsor always say that she believes January is the worst month for relapses for all those reasons you gave, and that we can get a bit complacent in January because we got through Xmas and New Year and kind of rest on our laurels a bit.

I don't know if you've ever used them, but I find that when I need an AA hit and there are no meetings to get to, the AA Speaker recordings really help me. I have a little MP3 player that I keep some of my favourite ones on so I can listen out and about and when driving as well. My favourites are Sandy Beach, Earl Hightower and Clancy. There's lots on youtube, but also a good website where they're free to listen and download... http://www.recoveryaudio.org/

I've also made sure than I plan a couple of things for this month so there are some fun things to look forward to.

Hope you feel better soon.

BB

bluedog97

Yes, this is a difficult time of year, although Im relieved the holidays are over. Im more of a warm weather person. Hang in there.

blueberry2015

Im only only doing my commitments at the mo which is two mtgs a week, i need do more at the mo. I do work which keeps me busy, im just low. Evenings are more when I feel the depression creeping in. I mainly do evening mtgs soooo i need to get on out to them.

blueberry2015

Thats very helpful x thank you for sharing what your sponsor had told you x