exitingstrategy

My wife left me a couple months ago due to my addiction issues. She says she will have me back once she knows I've changed. Well I don't know what change will mean. I've changed but not for the better been clean for 2 months but this holiday season had me thinking nothing but getting f'd up. I've been fighting it as well I've been making my relationship worse as well being grumpy and sabotaging it prob Amy for an excuse to use. I dunno but my mind is seriously messed up right now . Thx for whoever reads and replies

PurpleKnight

Hi Exitingstrategy, early Sobriety is tough, are you getting enough daily support? there's loads here on SR, alternatively meetings for face to face support can also be a good option.

For me I needed to show people that I had changed, and that took time, the further we put our old life in the past and build a new Sober life, people will begin to realise that this life change is for the long term.

Keep fighting and pushing through, and whatever you need to add to your recovery plan, add it!!

You can do this!!

Anna

I had to show my family I had changed, too. Two months of sobriety is great. Do you have support for your recovery? I also think it's important to remember that there is more to recovery than stopping drinking. I had to deal with the underlying issues that caused my addiction. Reading and posting here will be helpful for you.

january161992

thanks for the great honesty and great job on 2 months

just fyi, ive been in way more trouble as a sober and very active member of AA than i ever was during the 11 years i did a little bit of drinking

im no saint

'bout the only things ive done right are ...

not take a drink/ drug since my sobriety date
always go to meetings everyday unless i cant (there arent many cants)
always ask God for help
always have a formal service position in AA where i am accountable

Unwound

I realise this may not be possible for everyone but it is something that has helped me: Try to do some nice things for yourself and other people that you CAN do because your sober. Makes you appreciate it a lot more and you feel better about yourself too. I've been spending more time with my friends and kids, doing a few competitive and contemplative things that were hard to do while I was drinking.

Having a positive aspect to sobriety as well just the "must not do" helps me a bit.

Good luck, and gratz on two months, hope I get there too.

Mklove

Hi Exit, one of the reliefs I have found is the idea that my actions of today are in my control, the actions of others are not. The idea of your wife taking you back is nice but could be making your process more difficult. What actions can you make that will help you balance your personal goals? I find it helpful to review my goals frequently.........glad you are here!