On the train home for Christmas
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Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 197
On the train home for Christmas
Luckily my car went to the lot before my drinking became disordered. So I've never had the opportunity to drink and drive. I'm so grateful for that because I know in those blackout states I might have tried to. So I am grateful for that and that I'll be sober when we purchase our first car together.
Anyway, I had a ritual of always ordering two mini bottles of wine and the cheese plate when the cart cake by on the train for a 2.5 hour ride. Luckily I'm both in the middle of day rehab and intensive counselling (a step I never took before) and on Antabuse, so my ritual either by choice or not (hard to tell when on Antabuse) is a tea ritual. Nice bag of tea, steeped properly and slowly, to soothe my throats and the edges of my head cold.
Hunger and a clear head when I get home instead of anxiety over whether my parents suspects I've got a buzz. You'd think I was 17 not 35. Sigh.
I had a neocitran last night for my head cold and realized I liked it, so I threw the rest out. Amazing how we look for substitutes without even realizing it. I knew I'd go back for more of that "fatigue induced drowsy feeling" even without the symptoms of a cold another time. Now that reallly made me think about addiction/anxiety and mood altering substance use... I can see patterns of unhealthy use of food and drugs in my 20s before settling on my doc of alcohol... I think it's good to see this pattern to reinforce how strong my physical and psychological addiction is.
Anyway, I had a ritual of always ordering two mini bottles of wine and the cheese plate when the cart cake by on the train for a 2.5 hour ride. Luckily I'm both in the middle of day rehab and intensive counselling (a step I never took before) and on Antabuse, so my ritual either by choice or not (hard to tell when on Antabuse) is a tea ritual. Nice bag of tea, steeped properly and slowly, to soothe my throats and the edges of my head cold.
Hunger and a clear head when I get home instead of anxiety over whether my parents suspects I've got a buzz. You'd think I was 17 not 35. Sigh.
I had a neocitran last night for my head cold and realized I liked it, so I threw the rest out. Amazing how we look for substitutes without even realizing it. I knew I'd go back for more of that "fatigue induced drowsy feeling" even without the symptoms of a cold another time. Now that reallly made me think about addiction/anxiety and mood altering substance use... I can see patterns of unhealthy use of food and drugs in my 20s before settling on my doc of alcohol... I think it's good to see this pattern to reinforce how strong my physical and psychological addiction is.
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Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Northwest
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It sounds like a lovely way to spend a few hours...I'm a little jealous!
A nice cup of tea on a winter's night is one of the world's great pleasures...no calories, no hangover, just comfort in a cup.
Enjoy your holidays!
A nice cup of tea on a winter's night is one of the world's great pleasures...no calories, no hangover, just comfort in a cup.
Enjoy your holidays!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 197
Peppermint tea with a piece of chocolate is just incredible too!
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