cropduster74

Well we went to a friends house for a small Christmas dinner and they had beer and vodka. When I said Ian not drinking they naturally looked at me shocked. You ok? They asked. All I could say was yes I'm good tonight. I am not worried about their feelings what bothered me was I didn't feel as good as I wanted to saying no. I have always been very comfortable drinking at this good friends of mine's house. He's not even a big drinker really. Instead I felt irritable a bit. I wanted to talk as we were about sports and movies but with a drink in my hand. Just sipping and having two drinks. I know I could do that tonight, but tomorrow would be different. Probably 3-4 tomorrow, we all know how it goes. I am just 8 days in and I really hope this craving subsides!

Dee74

Hi cropduster

I found I really had to push myself past the mental rosy image of hanging out with friends and just having one or two...It was never like that for me.

Those few drinks could be the start of a nightmare for me and I forget that at my peril.

Trust me, you will learn to engage with your friends in the same way you used to - the bond with me and my real friends was not the drinking.

In time I realised I wanted to be, and preferred to be, sober. I wasn't missing a thing - well nothing good anyway....

Give yourself a little time to get used to the transition.

It might be good not to stretch yourself too hard socially until you develop those sober muscles

tursiops999

Hi cropduster -- it does get easier. My first few gatherings with friends after I quit alcohol felt very awkward -- I was not used to socializing sober and it was uncomfortable. It just took some time to develop a "new normal" -- and that's what I have now. It really does get easier with time and practice -- good job hanging in there tonight.

teaorcoffee

Well done for hanging in there.
About a week in was a tough time for me where my emotions were all over the place. A lot of people have said the same happened to them and it may explain your irritability.
It does get better and easier.
Hang in there.

Soberwolf

This is why I think it's a good idea not to go to these sorts of gatherings esp on day 8 in my opinion far too soon you got through it which is beyond awesome but know you don't have to test or go to such gatherings so early into your recovery

Like D said build them sober muscles first

5upersonic

I would echo what others have said. Consider avoiding occasions where others will be drinking for the first few months.

By the time I started going out again pretty much everyone knew I wasn't drinking, so no surprised reactions and only light hearted peer pressure to drink which is easily swatted away.

I'm finding it quite fun learning how to socialise without alcohol, although I'll try to make my excuses and leave before the drunkenness starts.

Delilah1

Hi,

Great job playing the tape through, and thinking about how you would feel in the morning. Like you, I wouldn't have stopped at one or two, and I know it would eventually lead me back to drinking again.

Several great posts already above. Like Soberwolf, I avoided both work and family functions during the first few weeks. As time has passed I have realized that very few people even notice what I am drinking. Close family and friends definitely did, because in the past I would have had a glass of wine in my hand. In the beginning my MIL made the "Oh, you can just have one little glass, it won't hurt." She eventually stopped saying that, and my two BILs who I am closest with, and were my wine buddies at events, have been supportive and told me how proud of me they are.

Glad you are here posting, and will wake up hangover free tomorrow!

Maudcat

It's early days. I would avoid the people, places, and things that trigger for a while.

Doh

Been there. I belong to a motorcycle club and I decided to quit at the start of the riding season. Many times I have bellied up to the bar only to turn and walk away empty handed. It was pure torture but it also took a lot of willpower. My biker buddies are now used to seeing me with a bottle of water and they are cool with that. It will be 182 days this Sunday.
Congrats on a great start.

cropduster74

Way to go Doh, that's awesome. Thanks for the responses all. Feel great this morning obviously. I went to bed last night thinking to myself that I enjoyed drinking for so long and it was only the last year or two to me that it has been toxic (mentally). I miss those old days so much. Even when I see pictures right now from year's past having a brew or wine. "That's when I wasn't in trouble with the family".

kinzoku

Glad you stayed strong.

Your inner dialogue was correct. One night it may have been a few beers with the friends. The next, if you are anything like me, would have been on your own. And more. And more.

IronPhoenix

Dee is right on about the sober muscles. I quite a year ago at the end of November and I basically needed to go off the radar through the holidays to make sure I made it through. Now I am much stronger and I mentally prepare myself for these holiday events.

You can do this.

cropduster74

exactly. That was my point. I easily would have had two LAST night because I knew I was just proving to myself and the wife that I am good. It's what would happen (possibly) today or tomorrow...

FLCamper

Good job on not having any alcohol. Waking up sober and not hung over reinforces your good decision.

I've found that immediately getting a coke (or whatever) helps. Then no one can offer to get me a drink as I already have one of my choice.