Another Day 1 for me, anxiety, pain, scared
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Oregon, West Coast, U.S.
Posts: 393
Another Day 1 for me, anxiety, pain, scared
I'm back, I am anxious and I feel sick. This holidays are rough. The good news is that I am now seeing a wonderful therapist each week. The bad news is I am still living at my mother's house, and she is just so hateful and dreadful. I can hardly stand to be around her for even 5 mins. And her husband is grumpy and just complains about every little thing most of the time. My therapist is helping me work on a plan. But I'm not there yet. I have to stay sober, or I won't get very far. Any advice, wisdom, kind words would be greatly appreciated. How do I get out of this seemingly endless cycle? Thank you.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 60
I haven't got past day one yet....
So I can't give advice. But I can give support. I know it's hard....but I come here and read other people's stories...I KNOW IT IS possible.
People do it. Some worse off.
One day at a time I htink is the best advice. I celebrate one day...and mourn when I can't do more. But...I know I will be able to ...one day...then two...
I can only commiserate.
So I can't give advice. But I can give support. I know it's hard....but I come here and read other people's stories...I KNOW IT IS possible.
People do it. Some worse off.
One day at a time I htink is the best advice. I celebrate one day...and mourn when I can't do more. But...I know I will be able to ...one day...then two...
I can only commiserate.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Mayflower, AR
Posts: 416
Welcome back bronzie 
I know the circumstances you are living in are difficult, as a matter of fact you described my mother (hateful) and my husband (grumpy and complains about every little thing) to a T, so I truly empathize with you.
Make this your last day 1. Work with your therapist, mine was a godsend.
You are correct in saying you will not get far if you don't stay sober. I found great comfort in keeping a journal, I could work out aggressions without engaging with the source of the anger I was feeling. Fire feeds fire and actions are more powerful than words.
Set a goal of getting out of the toxic environment; make that your reward for sobriety. One day at a time you can work toward that goal. Don't let them derail you and as difficult as it sounds, pity them for their lives wasted on hate and anger. See them as your future if you don't make changes now. You may never understand why they are the way they are.
Stay here and post often, let your SR family help your through this difficult time. We care, we listen and above all else we do not judge.
I wish you well on your recovery
You can do this, success comes from within.
I know the circumstances you are living in are difficult, as a matter of fact you described my mother (hateful) and my husband (grumpy and complains about every little thing) to a T, so I truly empathize with you.
Make this your last day 1. Work with your therapist, mine was a godsend.
You are correct in saying you will not get far if you don't stay sober. I found great comfort in keeping a journal, I could work out aggressions without engaging with the source of the anger I was feeling. Fire feeds fire and actions are more powerful than words.
Set a goal of getting out of the toxic environment; make that your reward for sobriety. One day at a time you can work toward that goal. Don't let them derail you and as difficult as it sounds, pity them for their lives wasted on hate and anger. See them as your future if you don't make changes now. You may never understand why they are the way they are.
Stay here and post often, let your SR family help your through this difficult time. We care, we listen and above all else we do not judge.
I wish you well on your recovery
You can do this, success comes from within.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Hi Bronzie
Good for you for stopping.....even if its 'again'. I have a lot of again's.
The trick is to stay stopped right? I know I needed a program, people, support, structure. AA has provided part of that for me. The other part is putting together a daily structured life that involves helping others, exercise, healthy diet and sleep. I also have my home/yard/dogs and daughter. All keep me busy.
Living at home would be very tough. And if you're there as a result of your addiction your parents are probably as irritated with you as you are with them. I'm not trying to be unkind here, just real. Quite obviously if you would like independence you must stay sober, get a job, save your pennies. Have you considered a sober living environment? Those are generally low cost and would give you a lot of structure.
Good for you for stopping.....even if its 'again'. I have a lot of again's.
The trick is to stay stopped right? I know I needed a program, people, support, structure. AA has provided part of that for me. The other part is putting together a daily structured life that involves helping others, exercise, healthy diet and sleep. I also have my home/yard/dogs and daughter. All keep me busy.
Living at home would be very tough. And if you're there as a result of your addiction your parents are probably as irritated with you as you are with them. I'm not trying to be unkind here, just real. Quite obviously if you would like independence you must stay sober, get a job, save your pennies. Have you considered a sober living environment? Those are generally low cost and would give you a lot of structure.
The road goes on forever
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Southern USA
Posts: 1,107
Hi there - I find that exercise of any kind... Like walking at a nearby park will clear my head.
Plus it is nice to get fresh air and get out.
Try walking outdoors 20-30 minutes and you will feel better!
Hope this helps!
Plus it is nice to get fresh air and get out.
Try walking outdoors 20-30 minutes and you will feel better!
Hope this helps!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Essex County New Jersey
Posts: 140
Hello Bronzie, I really feel your pain. I was on day one yesterday also, and in very bad shape. I made it through the day though ... and now on day 2. Still a bit rough today but it will get better with time. Hang in there today. Drink a lot of water. Cry if you have to. Try to get some space from your situation if you can... Stick close to SR for support throughout the day. Sounds like you have some good resources as you have professional help assisting in crafting a recovery plan, but I know how difficult it is when you are in a tough environment to stay on track.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Oregon, West Coast, U.S.
Posts: 393
Thank you for the response and I appreciate your support. I know it's hard, but coming here and reading does help me as well.
I hope you have a good day! Keep reading and posting....it gets better.
I hope you have a good day! Keep reading and posting....it gets better.
Originally Posted by Merigold 
I haven't got past day one yet....
So I can't give advice. But I can give support. I know it's hard....but I come here and read other people's stories...I KNOW IT IS possible.
People do it. Some worse off.
One day at a time I htink is the best advice. I celebrate one day...and mourn when I can't do more. But...I know I will be able to ...one day...then two...
I can only commiserate.
So I can't give advice. But I can give support. I know it's hard....but I come here and read other people's stories...I KNOW IT IS possible.
People do it. Some worse off.
One day at a time I htink is the best advice. I celebrate one day...and mourn when I can't do more. But...I know I will be able to ...one day...then two...
I can only commiserate.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Oregon, West Coast, U.S.
Posts: 393
Hi and thank you so much for sharing and being so understanding. I am journaling and reading books that my therapists has recommended. I am focusing on my own personal freedom and not letting others affect my own feelings. It's difficult, but it can be done....I just have to stay focused and do the work. I am also working with my therapist on making a plan, and changing my living environment. The holidays are especially a tough time for me, as I am overwhelmed with all the busy things going on, and also reminded of loss of loved ones.
So, I am glad to be here on SR, as this is sometimes the only place I can get the support and wisdom from people who understand the struggle.
Thank you again for responding!
So, I am glad to be here on SR, as this is sometimes the only place I can get the support and wisdom from people who understand the struggle.
Thank you again for responding!
Originally Posted by ladybug77
Welcome back bronzie
I know the circumstances you are living in are difficult, as a matter of fact you described my mother (hateful) and my husband (grumpy and complains about every little thing) to a T, so I truly empathize with you.
Make this your last day 1. Work with your therapist, mine was a godsend.
You are correct in saying you will not get far if you don't stay sober. I found great comfort in keeping a journal, I could work out aggressions without engaging with the source of the anger I was feeling. Fire feeds fire and actions are more powerful than words.
Set a goal of getting out of the toxic environment; make that your reward for sobriety. One day at a time you can work toward that goal. Don't let them derail you and as difficult as it sounds, pity them for their lives wasted on hate and anger. See them as your future if you don't make changes now. You may never understand why they are the way they are.
Stay here and post often, let your SR family help your through this difficult time. We care, we listen and above all else we do not judge.
I wish you well on your recovery You can do this, success comes from within.
I know the circumstances you are living in are difficult, as a matter of fact you described my mother (hateful) and my husband (grumpy and complains about every little thing) to a T, so I truly empathize with you.
Make this your last day 1. Work with your therapist, mine was a godsend.
You are correct in saying you will not get far if you don't stay sober. I found great comfort in keeping a journal, I could work out aggressions without engaging with the source of the anger I was feeling. Fire feeds fire and actions are more powerful than words.
Set a goal of getting out of the toxic environment; make that your reward for sobriety. One day at a time you can work toward that goal. Don't let them derail you and as difficult as it sounds, pity them for their lives wasted on hate and anger. See them as your future if you don't make changes now. You may never understand why they are the way they are.
Stay here and post often, let your SR family help your through this difficult time. We care, we listen and above all else we do not judge.
I wish you well on your recovery
You can do this, success comes from within.Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Oregon, West Coast, U.S.
Posts: 393
Thank you, that's a great idea. I will look into sober living places as an option. My therapist is helping me work on my plan.
And I am lookin into support groups as well. I have a 2 yr old and it's hard for me to find a sitter to go on a regular basis. But I am Familiar with the AA meetings in my town.
QUOTE=Frickaflip233;6254237]Hi Bronzie
Good for you for stopping.....even if its 'again'. I have a lot of again's.
The trick is to stay stopped right? I know I needed a program, people, support, structure. AA has provided part of that for me. The other part is putting together a daily structured life that involves helping others, exercise, healthy diet and sleep. I also have my home/yard/dogs and daughter. All keep me busy.
Living at home would be very tough. And if you're there as a result of your addiction your parents are probably as irritated with you as you are with them. I'm not trying to be unkind here, just real. Quite obviously if you would like independence you must stay sober, get a job, save your pennies. Have you considered a sober living environment? Those are generally low cost and would give you a lot of structure.[/QUOTE]
And I am lookin into support groups as well. I have a 2 yr old and it's hard for me to find a sitter to go on a regular basis. But I am Familiar with the AA meetings in my town.
QUOTE=Frickaflip233;6254237]Hi Bronzie
Good for you for stopping.....even if its 'again'. I have a lot of again's.
The trick is to stay stopped right? I know I needed a program, people, support, structure. AA has provided part of that for me. The other part is putting together a daily structured life that involves helping others, exercise, healthy diet and sleep. I also have my home/yard/dogs and daughter. All keep me busy.
Living at home would be very tough. And if you're there as a result of your addiction your parents are probably as irritated with you as you are with them. I'm not trying to be unkind here, just real. Quite obviously if you would like independence you must stay sober, get a job, save your pennies. Have you considered a sober living environment? Those are generally low cost and would give you a lot of structure.[/QUOTE]
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Oregon, West Coast, U.S.
Posts: 393
Absolutely! All of the snow has finally melted, so we can get outside for some fresh air and sunshine today! I was just thinking how much I need two things....oxygen and water!
Thank you....great suggestion!
Thank you....great suggestion!
Originally Posted by MidnightRider
Hi there - I find that exercise of any kind... Like walking at a nearby park will clear my head.
Plus it is nice to get fresh air and get out.
Try walking outdoors 20-30 minutes and you will feel better!
Hope this helps!
Plus it is nice to get fresh air and get out.
Try walking outdoors 20-30 minutes and you will feel better!
Hope this helps!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
Welcome back Bronzie (and Thomas )
my advice is to make a plan now - even if it's a difficult time and situation, I really believe you can be sober
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...val-guide.html
D
my advice is to make a plan now - even if it's a difficult time and situation, I really believe you can be sober
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...val-guide.html
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Oregon, West Coast, U.S.
Posts: 393
Thank you so much for providing these links. I am working on my plan!
Originally Posted by Dee74
Welcome back Bronzie (and Thomas )
my advice is to make a plan now - even if it's a difficult time and situation, I really believe you can be sober
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...val-guide.html
D
my advice is to make a plan now - even if it's a difficult time and situation, I really believe you can be sober
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...val-guide.html
D
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