PhoenixJ- my story, such as it is...
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 2,654
Hello PJ, like Gilmer, when I read your post, I too thought your son would be perhaps overwhelmed and not know how to react immediately. I don't know his age, but whatever age (I'm no spring chicken) your post touched me deeply and I've never met you. The die is certainly not cast. Your eldest son must have some good memories of time spent with you and he may be reflecting on them as they resurface, after his reading of your honest, heartfelt post, crammed with your true self. Please don't be disheartened, there's time yet.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Northern Michigan
Posts: 28,801
Originally Posted by PhoenixJ 
On careful reflection, encouragement and support from SR guys (like you, cakey) I sent 'such as it is' to my oldest son. He reads, but does not reply. The die is cast.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
PJ, as an adult child of alcoholics, I can imagine what he might be thinking. That he read it is a very good thing. He needs time to understand, to watch you grow to love yourself, and to feel safe in trusting you. Those things take time, and in my opinion, you are doing the very best things, for yourself, and that is the best thing for him as well.
Everything takes time, my friend. There is no way out, but through it. You are doing it! Children don't stop loving their parents easily, you know <3
Everything takes time, my friend. There is no way out, but through it. You are doing it! Children don't stop loving their parents easily, you know <3
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,663
Well, see how this goes...my story was intended for that thread- but not 12m yet so became it's own. Learning more about stuff with my story. Finished off a lifestyle healthy changes course- 4 weeks today. Exercise, gym, food, smoking- basics but very useful. That every body are on their own journeys and regardless of my own needs- every body has the right to be respected (mostly) for their opinions. No word from son, hope- but not holding my breath. I understand the bit about him maybe being overwhelmed.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: St. Louis, Mo
Posts: 7,334
I read an article when I first came on to SR. About family members and just because we have changed, doesn't mean they'll accept that on our timeline. It has to be theirs. We hurt our families. It may take a little longer for them to forgive. Just keep doing what you're doing, they'll see. I'll try and find it for you. It was really good.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 14,286
PJ, sometimes reconciliation can take a long time. I understand how important it is. Sadly it is one of those things in life over which we have little control. I hope for you that this will come! 
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
