People who keep you down
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: America
Posts: 4,136
I would like feedback. How does one deal with the influences of the past? What explanations do I owe them? Lastly, do some women treat low-self-esteem alcoholic nice guy men as their pets or something...is that a 'thing' in our culture? How do y'all handle past influences (especially when you have to work with them)?
A few problems here: Your low self esteem and the fact that you work with those two "friends"....therefore they technically are not "past influences". As long as you still work with them and interact with them on a regular basis they are not a PAST influence. Anything you can do about that?
As to your low self esteem: That is a process. We usually start building our self esteem in childhood. But it's never too late to start building a better one for yourself. It seems a good part of the reason you keep caving in to your ex girlfriend is because of your low self esteem. Maybe you think you don't deserve to hold out for someone who is better? Or maybe you just need more back bone. You've openly admitted that she is the WRONG girl for you....so why then do you keep ending up with her; only to break up again.? You need to stop that cycle somehow. And, you need to stop partying with them, because it sounds like that's how you end up with her....
So, YOU are the only one who can stop compromising yourself. You've got to take a STAND; plant your principles and stick to them. Don't be "guilt-tripped" into doing what goes against your new convictions. Don't worry about what "they" will think if you don't party with them.
If they bring these issues to the work place, that's another problem you are going to have to settle. If it starts interfering with your work, you need to take care of it right away.
Your desire to be clean and sober is quite commendable. How about coming up with a good plan and sticking to it?
A few problems here: Your low self esteem and the fact that you work with those two "friends"....therefore they technically are not "past influences". As long as you still work with them and interact with them on a regular basis they are not a PAST influence. Anything you can do about that?
As to your low self esteem: That is a process. We usually start building our self esteem in childhood. But it's never too late to start building a better one for yourself. It seems a good part of the reason you keep caving in to your ex girlfriend is because of your low self esteem. Maybe you think you don't deserve to hold out for someone who is better? Or maybe you just need more back bone. You've openly admitted that she is the WRONG girl for you....so why then do you keep ending up with her; only to break up again.? You need to stop that cycle somehow. And, you need to stop partying with them, because it sounds like that's how you end up with her....
So, YOU are the only one who can stop compromising yourself. You've got to take a STAND; plant your principles and stick to them. Don't be "guilt-tripped" into doing what goes against your new convictions. Don't worry about what "they" will think if you don't party with them.
If they bring these issues to the work place, that's another problem you are going to have to settle. If it starts interfering with your work, you need to take care of it right away.
Your desire to be clean and sober is quite commendable. How about coming up with a good plan and sticking to it?
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