Bananas44

Stopped at a gambling spot (instead of liquor store) after work. Next thing I know, I'm $300 lighter. I will tell you I definitely am not of the means to do this. I have gambled from time to time, but not like this. I haven't told my husband. Trying to fill the void I guess?

Dee74

I found that I could easily slip into another addiction, I did it for years (never gambling tho for some reason)

I was the problem. I had a void in me that stuff couldn't fill.

If you can nip this latest manifestation in the bud now, you'll be glad.

Do you have any kind of recovery plan for alcohol? maybe you need to widen it a little?

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html



D

Bananas44

I have no plan besides never drinking again. The pattern appears to be my ride home is the hardest. Starting next week, my husband will be riding with me. That will fix this. I won't be able to lie if he's there.

Dee74

I added a link. I think it's worth a perusal

D

Bananas44

Thanks I'll check it out now.

entropy1964

Any connection between your earlier thread about risky behaviors after quitting drinking?

I'll go out on a limb here but I have noticed I just like being naughty sometimes. Pretty childish but it's true. Like I MUST do something at least a little bad. Not directly to a person, but just little insidious naughty things. Getting away with something maybe? Dunno. Maybe the gambling was a bit of acting out (I say this because of the earlier thread) more than cross addiction? But if it's cross addiction be very careful.

MissOverIt

I can relate to this. I've always been attracted to being a little bad if I can. Like it's cooler or something.

least

But what will you do when he can't ride with you? There has to come a time when he can't ride with you and you need to be prepared for that. That's where a strong sobriety plan can help.

Bananas44

Yes I was thinking of stopping to do something besides drink and it was something I was thinking of doing. Im shocked I went so far though.

Bananas44

Very true, there will be times like those. I am reading Dee's links now and will work on a plan

FreedomCA

Hi Bananas,
I have both an alcohol and gambling sobriety, as those were my two dangerous addictions. My gambling sobriety is about a month longer than my alcohol sobriety. I used gambling as an escape from reality and enjoyed the high of winning. If I lost, however, I was prone to drink my depression from losing away. Glad to hear you are mindful of this getting out of control and nipping it in the bud now.😉

Bananas44

Congrats on your double sobriety, I bet your pockets are a lot fatter! I am definitely taking gambling off the list of evening wind down activities since I obviously can't stop with just a $20 or 2

Berrybean

There will always be hard bits of sobriety. That's why we have to fix our alcoholic thinking as well as our alcoholic drinking. If we keep looking at life with an alcoholic perspective it all gets too much. Too grey. Too scary. Too depressing. We end up needing to escape and either relapse or transfer addictions and act out in other damaging ways.

The way we address that alcoholic thinking - our faulty perspective - is through working on our recovery. Dee's thread is a good un and has some great links. There are lots of options out there for recovery methods. I'm an AAer, and regardless of whether that's something you're willing to try, I think it's worth noting that in their 12-step program, only the first of the steps even mentions alcohol. The other 11 are all about addressing that thinking / faulty perspective.

Wishing you all the best for your recovery. BB

Berrybean

Just remembered something someone told me ... they'd gone (like a good dad) along to parents evening because that's the kind of thing you get to do when you're sober. But to counteract all that 'boring goodness' he stole all the pens as he went round.

Next day he returned em, and upped his program a tad. Lol.

PhoenixJ

Stay safe, prayers PJ

Soberwolf

My brother is an ex gambler & trust me you don't want to go down that road

I think being good is a hard job I don't want to be a naughty or cool person I just wanted to be me again (still finding out who I am btw) and I know in my life I could of walked down a lot of easier darker paths I chose not to and now I'm sober I find being mindful & patience to be a great help

Bananas44

Thanks everyone. I decided to tell my husband about it and he was supportive. He still doesn't think things were as bad as they were with my drinking, mostly because he's seen worse in his family, but he does say he's proud of me even if it sounds like he's just saying what he thinks he's "supposed to say". Im going to work on a notebook while I'm at work today (my boss is out of town) and hopefully I can learn to recognize these urges to do something risky and try to control them.

PurpleKnight

I now see what your post earlier about "risky behaviour" yesterday was all about!!

As others have said, deal with the new behaviour and keep moving forward!!

biminiblue

I worked as a dealer in Nevada at a large casino...trust me, you're not going to win money long-term. I saw so many people ruin their lives while I worked there, not just gambling, but the 24 hour free drinks. Really bad combo.

I wasn't a gambler when I started working there, but I was a drinker. I found out which dollar poker machines were big payers and started playing them. Those things are super dangerous. They have bright lights and pretty sounds and the *clankclankclank* of coins dropping and when I was winning it was a huge high. I could go faster and faster, win more and more. I got lots of attention, free drinks, blah blah blah. It's just another compulsion, only it has the added lure of easy money. Those big casinos weren't built by paying out a lot of bets.

Luckily I reeled that behavior in after losing my entire paycheck one time. I couldn't keep doing that and still keep a roof over my head. I definitely felt the pull, though.

Bananas44

Thank you all for your comments. I will remember all of your advice and I'm still on the hunt for a safer hobby haha