Want to stop drinking completely
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Scotland
Posts: 6
Want to stop drinking completely
Hi this is my first post and have never been on any sites like this, I really want to stop drinking I am 41 and have been drinking at weekends for 17 years that's how long I have been married. I have tried before but failed my husband doesn't want to stop drinking, he is happy to drink himself to sleep on the couch every weekend. I can drink about 2 bottles of wine every night at weekend and is increasingly getting worse. I am tiered through the week and normally ill on a Monday.
I feel if my husband is drinking in the house its a temptation for me to drink or if the kids cause me stress i feel I need a drink, or come time on a Friday night you get that feeling of wanting a drink, I get the tremors in my hands not sure if its to with drinking or not I really need to do this any advice appreciated.
I feel if my husband is drinking in the house its a temptation for me to drink or if the kids cause me stress i feel I need a drink, or come time on a Friday night you get that feeling of wanting a drink, I get the tremors in my hands not sure if its to with drinking or not I really need to do this any advice appreciated.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome to SR Ginger. Glad to hear that you are interested in quitting, you will find a lot of people who have been in your exact situation and found a way to get sober. It is sometimes a bit more difficult to do with a spouse who drinks, but it's not impossible at all - many have done exactly that.
Tremors can be a sign of withdrawals and they can potentially be dangerous if you haven't ever quit completely for a period of time. The best bet is to speak with your doctor if you feel you might have withdrawals that are more serious.
Tremors can be a sign of withdrawals and they can potentially be dangerous if you haven't ever quit completely for a period of time. The best bet is to speak with your doctor if you feel you might have withdrawals that are more serious.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by GingerBread1 
I feel if my husband is drinking in the house its a temptation for me to drink or if the kids cause me stress i feel I need a drink, or come time on a Friday night you get that feeling of wanting a drink, I get the tremors in my hands not sure if its to with drinking or not I really need to do this any advice appreciated.
Read around the forum. You will see a lot of posts from folks in a similar situation--not knowing how to get started on the road to sobriety. A lot of wisdom in the replies. So read. Decide what will work for you, and don't let your addiction discourage you from quitting.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,504
Welcome, Ginger!
I'm glad that you have decided to stop drinking. There are many people here who stop drinking, even though their spouse is still drinking. If you have the motivation, you will be able to do this. It's a good idea to make a plan for yourself to help you get through the times when you would normally be drinking. And, talking to your dr is always a good idea before you stop drinking.
I'm glad that you have decided to stop drinking. There are many people here who stop drinking, even though their spouse is still drinking. If you have the motivation, you will be able to do this. It's a good idea to make a plan for yourself to help you get through the times when you would normally be drinking. And, talking to your dr is always a good idea before you stop drinking.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,668
GB1- hi. Stay safe- perhaps see a doctor. Your anxiety might need to be cared for. Have you been to an AA meeting? There is also SMART. Keep posting, you have come to a very, very good place to learn, get support and share. Prayers to you. PJ
The road goes on forever
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Southern USA
Posts: 1,107
Hi Ginger and Welcome!
I do understand where you are coming from....
But think of how much BETTER YOU will be when YOU quit.
Maybe best to consult with your doctor and make a plan to quit.
I'm sure you can find a way to "deal" with stress ... Without the drinking.
You will be so much better and healthier without the wine every weekend. Try it!!
I do understand where you are coming from....
But think of how much BETTER YOU will be when YOU quit.
Maybe best to consult with your doctor and make a plan to quit.
I'm sure you can find a way to "deal" with stress ... Without the drinking.
You will be so much better and healthier without the wine every weekend. Try it!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Scotland
Posts: 6
Thanks
Thanks for all your comments I am surprised on how many of use have replied, I have not contacted the AA, I know my husband and myself have a problem but he will not discuss it, I know come Thursday night I'll get that feeling of needing a drink but I really need to not give in this time.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Welcome GB. I could have written your post myself. I'm now 2 and a half years sober, and my partner still drinks like he did before.
I go to AA and get lots of support there, plus it means I now have sober female friends to meet up with for fun and a natter at the weekend when his lordship is drink or recovering. I especially find my Friday and Sunday evening meetings really help me deal with his drinking excessively at the weekends.
I'd suggest trying to add something into your weekend evenings and not just remove the alcohol. If alcohol was the way you unwound, some different relaxation tools. If it was to make you feel happy and excited, something fun. If it made you feel more attractive and alluring, maybe a home beauty session.
Oh - and take extra special care over those common triggers for cravings and HALT. Hungry-Angry-Lonely-Tired. These are very common triggers, so you have a good excuse for a big bar of Toblerone now eh. Lol
I go to AA and get lots of support there, plus it means I now have sober female friends to meet up with for fun and a natter at the weekend when his lordship is drink or recovering. I especially find my Friday and Sunday evening meetings really help me deal with his drinking excessively at the weekends.
I'd suggest trying to add something into your weekend evenings and not just remove the alcohol. If alcohol was the way you unwound, some different relaxation tools. If it was to make you feel happy and excited, something fun. If it made you feel more attractive and alluring, maybe a home beauty session.
Oh - and take extra special care over those common triggers for cravings and HALT. Hungry-Angry-Lonely-Tired. These are very common triggers, so you have a good excuse for a big bar of Toblerone now eh. Lol
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
Welcome Ginger! You will find lots of support on SR. Wine was my downfall as well, except I was drinking a bottle nightly, instead of just on weekends.
I have 10 and a half months sober thanks to SR. I finally took Dee's advice about having and sticking to a recovery plan. Life still gets sticky at times, but it is so much better sober.
My husband still drinks every night. At first that was difficult, but I needed to stop for me. My advice is to plan something during the time you would have normally been drinking.
You can do this!
I have 10 and a half months sober thanks to SR. I finally took Dee's advice about having and sticking to a recovery plan. Life still gets sticky at times, but it is so much better sober.
My husband still drinks every night. At first that was difficult, but I needed to stop for me. My advice is to plan something during the time you would have normally been drinking.
You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 508
My husband stopped drinking over 4 years ago, myself, I've been sober 3 years.
In the end I had to stop for myself and I am now enjoying some candles and relaxing with some soft music and a coke, looking forward to getting up tomorrow and everyday without the after effects of the alcohol. Put yourself first and do it for you, your husband may be like me and follow your example once he see's how well you are doing.
Life looks and feels so much better over here, welcome
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In the end I had to stop for myself and I am now enjoying some candles and relaxing with some soft music and a coke, looking forward to getting up tomorrow and everyday without the after effects of the alcohol. Put yourself first and do it for you, your husband may be like me and follow your example once he see's how well you are doing.
Life looks and feels so much better over here, welcome
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