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57 days

Old 11-11-2016, 08:34 AM
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57 days

Hi All

Firstly good luck to you wherever you are.

I decided to quit after 23 years of frequent binge drinking. I had a bit of a bender which ended with losing a long term friend and having big issues with self loathing. I have had a difficult relationship with booze for my whole drinking career, but enough good times to plough ahead.

I suddenly decided that actually the good times were bull **** and this had to stop.

So 57 days ago I did. The first 54 days were easy. But the last 3 days have been a bit of a wobble. I don't want a drink but I do feel anxious and depressed. Also loads of guilt for past actions.

Can any one relate to this or offer any guidance.

Thanks
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Old 11-11-2016, 10:14 AM
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hi Crucrimbo

great job on 57 days!

"Also loads of guilt for past actions."

the great news is that the fellowship of AA gives us tools to clean up these messes

tools like making amends to those we have harmed

God bless



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Old 11-11-2016, 10:16 AM
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Congratulations on 57 days, Crucrimbo. That is brilliant! Maybe your anxity doesn't have much to do with lack of drinking. Maybe you are tired, or hungry, or lonely. Maybe your body clock is off. Go for a walk? Get outside? Fresh air is always good. As to regret about past actions, well, you will have to find a way out of that. If possible, make amends. Write a letter ithe person you hurt in which you own every part of what you did. You don't have to send it. Sometimes just writing it down helps with clarity and serenity. When I taught, we used to spend a fair amount of time going over apology of actions, or, in 5-year-old speak: "Don't just say sorry. SHOW sorry." Small as they were, the children got that immediately. I have always believed that children have an innate sense of fairness and justice. Anyway, peace and good luck.
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Old 11-11-2016, 10:26 AM
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I think it is important to keep going and take some time to look at your regrets to see if there is anything you can do or say.
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Old 11-11-2016, 10:28 AM
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OK! Great!!
on 57 days
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Old 11-11-2016, 10:42 AM
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Hi All

- I have never slept better
- I am more physically active than ever
- I am out a lot
- sent my apology

Realised that I am missing the lads Xmas drinks maybe is it. End of a chapter.

The reality is other than one person I don't have anyone to apologize to. I think I realised I was unacceptable before they did. I worry about the things I did that I got away with, the unplayed consequences.

The other issue is as of today I have the job. The job. Already got the pool, the car, the private schools. And I feel nothing. Zilch. I know it's good, I know I will enjoy it. But joy - no.

I have the feeling that everything i worked for maybe a load of rubbish and I am just seeing it.

I don't think there are answers to this but just wanted to type it.

I don't want a drink though.

Thanks
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Old 11-11-2016, 03:11 PM
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Welcome to the Forum Crucrimbo!!
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