Beabetterme

So my daughter has been aloof for quite some time. Acts happy but then shuts down. Previously when she was at her worst point at 12 years old we saw on her phone she was threatening suicide. We took her to counseling and group therapy. She rebelled more. So we stopped. She said that she didn't have any of the problems those kids had and didn't want to be there. We believed her. Fast forward two years. Ups and downs but nothing horrible. there has been lots of other things coming up and she told us previously it's because a boy she liked tried to force his hands down her pants. Well fast forward two years later and now she has told us he raped her. I don't know what to do. She said she didn't say anything because Sh was scared of him and going to court. My heart is split into one thousand tiny pieces. Where do we go from here?

Beabetterme

Obviously not the best place to Pask for advice. But I'm drinking. And triggered.

Delizadee

I'm sorry
A lot of people who have been assaulted don't come forward out of fear.
Have you asked her what you can do to help her?
Have you considered talking to the police?

Please remember to take care of yourself right now too. I'm not coming down on you for drinking, but I think if you can muster up the courage and strength to put the drink down so you can be present as possible for her, and for yourself and your family, would really help.
And don't blame yourself for this, whatever you do. I think at the very least some counseling for her and for you, maybe some family counseling might be helpful.
I'm really sorry I'm keeping you guys in my thoughts.

teatreeoil007

Actually, this is a great place to reach out.

Yikes, if I found out my daughter had been raped I would be beside myself.

You don't need me to point out that drinking over this will not help her get the help and healing she so needs. And, it won't help you get the help you need to deal with this...

Yes, get her professional help. It's good that she told you. Some rape victims keep those types of things locked away for years and years and sometimes never tell a soul. But it can cause a lot of emotional and psychological problems. It is a contributor to suicide and addiction issues. So, she really really needs help and it might be good to get her hooked up with rape recovery specialists.

Anna

I'm so sorry for your daughter and what she has gone through. This is the time for you to step up and be the strong one for her. She has opened up to you about the incident so you have an opportunity to help her. Personally, I hope you both go to the police, but each rape victim has to decide what is the best choice for her. Believe that you are strong enough to help your daughter through this trauma.

Dee74

so your daughters 16 now?

This is a really useful resource for your daughter or for anyone else who's dealing with this problem.

https://www.rainn.org/

As for you - I understand your pain - but drinking never made anything better for me beabetterme.

Lean on us instead - your daughter needs you 'present' now more than ever, I think?

D