MidnightRider

Hey Jim - Sorry you are going through this and drinking. But good that you stopped here to check in. I am proof that even when the BS is happening... You CAN make decision right now to stop drinking.

Tomorrow morning will be Day 1!

When you are sober and in control ... It makes it so much easier to deal with things. Just want to tell you .... You're not alone. Many fine folks here ready to be there for ya.

Hevyn

I'm sorry for the pain you're in Jim. I remember thinking a few drinks would help me cope with emotions - but I was always wrong. Nothing got solved & I just added to my misery. I know you realize that - I hope things will go better tomorrow. You can talk to us here - as MR said - you aren't alone.

JimSock

If Yoda was an alcoholic and he met Me , he would say " Ahhh... The AV is Strong with him!!"

Dee74

I found another yoda quote to be very useful in my recovery -


In that spirit ....how about tipping out the rest of whats in the nearly empty fridge, drinking some water and calling it an early night Jim?

D

Algorithm

I think Yoda would also advise playing offense instead of defense in that situation, JimSock. So, how about playing offense, and tightening up those loose screws on your Beast?

You went through the free AVRT crash course, but you should get the book Rational Recovery: The New Cure for Substance Addiction by Jack Trimpey, which explains the method in greater detail. It is very inexpensive online from Amazon.

The Secular Connections Forum also has a lot of good information and discussion on AVRT.

JimSock

I did just pour out my Last three beers,and I Will DO!!..... the book is on its way,I ordered it on Friday.

I'm Trying!!

Mick75

Hi Jim,
Peace be with you, it starts right now, brother one day at a time.

CaseyW

Good job pouring out those beers, JimSock. Stick close--there's a ton of great wisdom and support to be found in these forums.

JimSock

6 a.m. here, I'm starting my "First Day". Wish me luck!

Dee74

Not to be a wiseguy but you don't need luck Jim - just a little hard work - you can do this

D

MidnightRider

Good going. You can do this.

Be sure to join the November 2016 Class thread here.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...thread-14.html

JimSock

Nope, not today. I kept positive thoughts all day, I even went to the gym.... But.... The Beast got the best of me. That Bastard! He is Amazingly Clever....

Coldfusion

Well, you came here so your heart is still in this. Stick with us and give it another try!

soberlicious

Hi JimSock,
While awaiting the RR book, there is a very lengthy discussion ( 6 threads long) on AVRT in the secular connections section of SR. The entire secular connections forum is worth reading. Here is a link to the first thread of the discussion :
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...iscussion.html

JimSock

I'm really trying to Be Positive, but, then all of a sudden ...l feel like I've launched Into a Gigantic Black Hole.... Confused......Only momentary...... just long enough for me to forget what I wanted to remember.

JimSock

Find Happiness, don't wait for it. In many cases it was there and you just didn't want to see it.

Dee74

Hi Jim

I'm not firing on all cylinders today ...what do you mean by black hole?

mood swing? memory loss? relapse?

D

JimSock

Mood swings, and that is an Understatement! I try to think positive and imagine how great my future can be. And out of nowhere I'm blind sided by horrible thoughts. They instantly suck the Hope and Happiness right out of me. Sometimes I wonder if I, subconsciously, "Enjoy" the pain. So lost and confused these days. I feel like I can't control my own thoughts.

biminiblue

That's all part of the brain and nervous system healing. The emotional swings and difficulty staying under control emotionally will get better - you will return to baseline. The spinny brain was difficult to deal with. All of this will slow down, you're doing great!

Just hang on. Keep doing the next right thing for yourself and give your body time to heal itself.

I find sleep, exercise, healthy food and a gratitude list to be my best tools for sobriety and for life.

JimSock

It's been a Long Time. But, I'm back.I still have the Beast on my back...... I've been trying to justify my drinking.... and I really can't. I would really like to, again, start to STOP. Any thoughts, advice or encouragement would be Much appreciated.