In torment
samsbaby
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Phoenix AZ
Posts: 2
In torment
I have been sober for 53 days. I was going to all kinds of 12 step groups, as I am a drug addict-rx drugs. Lots of them. Attempted duicide 54 days ago, but was found. I wish I hadn't been. This is too hard. My husband thinks I should be all right now and doesn't encourage me to go to meetings, si I haven't for the last 10 days.I tried to get a sponsor and called someone and they never called back, so I am afriad to go to meetings after being rejected.Sober or not, it's the crap.I'm not worth it.I can't even get past step 1 because of ego.
In Memory Of
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Connecticut.
Posts: 3,736
welcome
My name is Trish and I am an addict , also addicted to rx for a long time . Its not easy but it can be done , soon I will have one year clean . I encourage you to go back to meetings despite what your husband says . Its your recovery not his . Sometimes people are busy and dont call us back try not to take it personally . There are alot of warm and wonderful people in the fellowship get some more phone numbers , go to a meeting and ask for help, in the meantime we are here for you,hang in there you are not alone ..Trish
Mending
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Atlantic Canada
Posts: 299
Hey samsbaby
I don't know you, but I do know this:
You are worth it!!
Addicts are not very good at believing in themselves, so let us believe in you until you can.
This is a great place to share your thoughts and troubles and you will find many caring people who have been exactly where you are.
There is help and, yes, we do recover!
cj
You are worth it!!
Addicts are not very good at believing in themselves, so let us believe in you until you can.
This is a great place to share your thoughts and troubles and you will find many caring people who have been exactly where you are.
There is help and, yes, we do recover!
cj
We all need each other.
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: The road of happy destiny.
Posts: 2,294
Hello Samsbaby--I agree with cj. You are worth it!!!! Get back to the meetings. Speak up and let the people there know how you are feeling. And as far as the sponsor thing goes, most people have to ask quite a few people before they find someone. That is something else you could bring up in a meeting--tell them you are looking for a sponsor. PLEASE don't give up. You can do this.
Keep posting.
Hugs--
Keep posting.
Hugs--
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: western canada
Posts: 1,441
Hey girl..
You gonna let life beat you down?
I don't know your history... but I can totally relate to your presenting problems...
I've had suicidal moments in my life... but I understand now that it was the disease of codependancy.. manifiested in my childhood and in my adult life that made me feel that I was wrong... bad... worthless.... not worth going on for.
The disease of codendancy is beatable though...
I hope you stick around and kick it in the face by understanding how it is working in your life.
Welcome to Sober Recovery Samsbaby...
You gonna let life beat you down?
I don't know your history... but I can totally relate to your presenting problems...
I've had suicidal moments in my life... but I understand now that it was the disease of codependancy.. manifiested in my childhood and in my adult life that made me feel that I was wrong... bad... worthless.... not worth going on for.
The disease of codendancy is beatable though...
I hope you stick around and kick it in the face by understanding how it is working in your life.
Welcome to Sober Recovery Samsbaby...
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,476
Samsbaby,
It is hard, but it is so worth it. I'm Anna, recovering alcoholic and I relate so much to what you said about your husband thinking you should be alright now. My husband had no clue what I was going through, but people who are not addicts just cannot understand. You have to do this for yourself and you can get lots of support and encouragement here at SR.
Hang in there!
Love, Anna
It is hard, but it is so worth it. I'm Anna, recovering alcoholic and I relate so much to what you said about your husband thinking you should be alright now. My husband had no clue what I was going through, but people who are not addicts just cannot understand. You have to do this for yourself and you can get lots of support and encouragement here at SR.
Hang in there!
Love, Anna
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Martinsburg, WV
Posts: 15
Don't give up!
I know it's crazy, but remember that song about the ant and the rubber tree plant. Persistence!
Follow the advice above. It can be done. Once I was so depressed I nearly did it. Although I din't then stop drinking, I do have two kids now and I am so glad I am here.
I know it's crazy, but remember that song about the ant and the rubber tree plant. Persistence!
Follow the advice above. It can be done. Once I was so depressed I nearly did it. Although I din't then stop drinking, I do have two kids now and I am so glad I am here.
Not the center of the Universe
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Orchard Lake, Michigan
Posts: 974
samsbaby,
NO, you are not too far gone. Begin at the beginning each day and take happiness and give thanks at the end of each day if only for the fact that you made it through another day without using. Don't let one unfortunate experience set you back. You might try an N.A. meeting instead of (or in addition to) A.A. Ask questions when you have them and listen to the answers even if they are not the answers you expect to hear. You CAN do this.
Jah Bless
NO, you are not too far gone. Begin at the beginning each day and take happiness and give thanks at the end of each day if only for the fact that you made it through another day without using. Don't let one unfortunate experience set you back. You might try an N.A. meeting instead of (or in addition to) A.A. Ask questions when you have them and listen to the answers even if they are not the answers you expect to hear. You CAN do this.
Where there is life, there's hope, they say,
So I know that there will be a better day.
All I have to do is hope and work and pray,
and I know that my God will show the way.
Luciano, "Where There is Life"
("God" == "Higher Power")So I know that there will be a better day.
All I have to do is hope and work and pray,
and I know that my God will show the way.
Luciano, "Where There is Life"
Jah Bless
tha toastah
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: montreal, quebec
Posts: 191
hi samsbaby
yes it will be hard at times. there are days where i think "f.u.c.k this s.h.i.t!!" and am ready to give up. but theres a little voice inside me that keeps me goin. it tells me "If you give up, youll never know how close you were to getting there!" and its true my dear.come on, dont you wana be a winner? you can if you want. theres no way youre too far gone, ive met way too many sober addicts and alcoholics that *I* would of pronounced too far gone if id seen them active. there is hope for everybody. im almost 4 months sober, and that my friend, IS A MIRACLE. keep going to meetings, take the advice youre given, and give it a chance. cmon, you ARE worth it!
hang in there
tobstah
yes it will be hard at times. there are days where i think "f.u.c.k this s.h.i.t!!" and am ready to give up. but theres a little voice inside me that keeps me goin. it tells me "If you give up, youll never know how close you were to getting there!" and its true my dear.come on, dont you wana be a winner? you can if you want. theres no way youre too far gone, ive met way too many sober addicts and alcoholics that *I* would of pronounced too far gone if id seen them active. there is hope for everybody. im almost 4 months sober, and that my friend, IS A MIRACLE. keep going to meetings, take the advice youre given, and give it a chance. cmon, you ARE worth it!
hang in there
tobstah
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Good Ole' Rocky Top!
Posts: 3,540
Samsbaby-
Welcome to Sr. PLEASE don't give up. You and your life are so worth it! My husband didnt "get it" either, but you have to keep going for you! Go to meetings, come here. We will be here for you to help you through.
Love,
Overit
Welcome to Sr. PLEASE don't give up. You and your life are so worth it! My husband didnt "get it" either, but you have to keep going for you! Go to meetings, come here. We will be here for you to help you through.
Love,
Overit
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