Need Encouragement
 

Was sober for 2 years. Decided to drink again a year ago. Gave into the illusion that I could and I was magically cured from problem drinking. So much negative things have happened in this year. I'll spare the details. Even though I damned well know I can't drink normally I want to and I like the way it makes me feel. But then there is the next day. And I always drink till I puke, I fall, I blackout, etc... I want to be able to go to winery tours and party with my friends at the beach or have a glass of fine wine with dinner! But I CAN'T! Why do I still want it. My trigger is that my brain is wired that that is the only way to have fun. When I'm not drinking I'm bored to stitches. My husband is very sendentary and not exciting at all. But I shouldn't rely on him to make ME happy. I get so bored and so lonely. I want to have sober friends to hang out with but I'm not AA material. I guess I'll try a SMART meeting on Monday to see what it's like. I wish my husband would go with me. We got sober together for 2 years. Nice to do it with him. Anyway, I'm obsessing over living alcohol free because in my mind it sucks. But it sucks more being hung over, bruised up, black out, not to mention my son hates mommy drunk.

I know that feeling of being wired to need the drink to have fun. I know the feeling of sober boredom. It stinks...

In a way, you are wired this way -from the habit. If you can have a little bit of faith and patience, this will change dramatically as your head adjusts to not needing the chemical kick.

I was so tired of all the drama that I took another's advice and sat down with my boredom. I dared it to outlast me. It threw a tantrum (which sucked) and now I think I really have MORE fun than my drinking friends. I remember it too.

Have faith that if you stay sober long enough THIS WILL PASS.

Hi Sunshine

Accepting I couldn't drink again was a life changing decision for me. I began to find that, through my sober choices, my life began to reflect the real me much more than my drinking life ever did.

I found peace, meaning joy and serenity - that was a great step up from doing things over and over again that were self destructive.

I cannot express to you how glad I was I found my real self again and how glad I am to be living this life I've built,.

Not drinking alcohol seems to me a ridiculously small price to pay for that.

If you really enjoy doing things with your friends there's no reason why you can't continue to do them, just without drinking.

Build up some sober muscles first tho. Work on your recovery and reinforce the reasons you want to be sober. Too much too soon will drag you back down - as you've found out.

But.. it's really the *drinking* you enjoy with your friends then I think you have to choose and decide like I had to - I can drink..or be who I want to be - but not both.

D

2 years is so good! I'm in the 100 days and am enjoying life much more. I have more "fun" now than I did drinking because you know what happens when we drink. We just need to find a new kind of fun! I miss hanging out with some people but I have to choose a new way of life and if that means for giving up events wineries pubs etc it's worth it. There is more to life than just that! Maybe in the future you can do some of those things without drinking. I've been trying to make sober friends in AA . Out of the 3 months I have made 2 that I am just now feeling comfortable with. There are plenty of people out there that want the same thing for themselves and if you stay diligent you will find them!

Welcome back Sunshine!! :)

Thank you so much. BTW I LOVE LEMMY!

Encouragement

:lmao

you can do it!

:tyou