I am back again
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 26
I am back again
I had made a few posts in March of 2015 when I was quitting last time. I didn't work. I was sober for about 2 months and my dad had a heart attack and died on May 24, 2015. My mom passed away in 2001 and since then my dad and I were so close. He was my best friend. I could tell him "almost" anything.
Since then I have been in a bad place mentally and physically. My drinking has gotten completely out of control! AGAIN!
I went to the doctor after my dad died and I was put on Lexapro. But for me the only thing that seemed to keep the demons at bay for a moment is alcohol.
My husband is an alcoholic too. Two weeks ago we were both drunk, again, and we got into a huge fight!! The next morning I couldn't even remember why we were fighting! I decided that was enough!
Today is Day 14, again. I am really struggling everyday to make it this far. I want a beer so bad. I just need someone to tell me its going to get better!
Tina
Since then I have been in a bad place mentally and physically. My drinking has gotten completely out of control! AGAIN!
I went to the doctor after my dad died and I was put on Lexapro. But for me the only thing that seemed to keep the demons at bay for a moment is alcohol.
My husband is an alcoholic too. Two weeks ago we were both drunk, again, and we got into a huge fight!! The next morning I couldn't even remember why we were fighting! I decided that was enough!
Today is Day 14, again. I am really struggling everyday to make it this far. I want a beer so bad. I just need someone to tell me its going to get better!
Tina
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
I'm sorry for your loss Tina, but I'm glad you made your way back here 
Things really will get better...things may be rough for a little while, but please do have faith - being sober is definitely the best way to go
why not check out our Class of October support thread - it's for everyone quitting this month
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-thread-5.html
D
Things really will get better...things may be rough for a little while, but please do have faith - being sober is definitely the best way to go
why not check out our Class of October support thread - it's for everyone quitting this month
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-thread-5.html
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 744
So sorry for your loss but I think deciding to stop drinking and coming back to SR is exactly what you need. 14 days is wonderful. It will get so much better soon. I'm 6 months tomorrow and I'm in a very different place than I was. It still takes work and focus on recovery each and everyday but that's so much better use of my energy and time than how to keep doing something that was making me absolutely miserable. Agree with Dee...consider the Oct class. Welcome.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 387
Sorry for your loss Tina. Well done on the 14 days, don't lose that day count just to have a beer-who knows where it will end. You're doing the right thing by posting. You can get through the craving, minute by minute. Play the tape forward.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Welcome back and hope to see you around. Great job on 2 weeks- hope you are well today.
I know the loss of my parents (who are 71) will be a huge blow to me; different reasons for each, I anticipate. I am so grateful that I will be sober whenever that happens.
What is your plan this time around?
Good luck.
I know the loss of my parents (who are 71) will be a huge blow to me; different reasons for each, I anticipate. I am so grateful that I will be sober whenever that happens.
What is your plan this time around?
Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Hi Mystary
Welcome back. Grief is a very tricky thing. Do find some counseling or a grief group to attend if you feel you aren't able to move forward.
I lost my husband a few years back so I understand the loss. For me alcohol does absolutely nothing to help process the pain. It only prolongs it and creates all kind of other problems.
Hang in there and congrats on 2 weeks!
Welcome back. Grief is a very tricky thing. Do find some counseling or a grief group to attend if you feel you aren't able to move forward.
I lost my husband a few years back so I understand the loss. For me alcohol does absolutely nothing to help process the pain. It only prolongs it and creates all kind of other problems.
Hang in there and congrats on 2 weeks!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 26
Thanks for all the replies. It kind of overwhelmed me. I almost cried. I have tears in my eyes. I am an emotional roller coaster. I am mad one minute and sad the next. It is a relief to know I am not alone.
I don't have a plan for recovery yet. My mind is all over the place. I can't think straight. Right now I really can't plan for anything except that I will NOT DRINK today. One day at a time.
I don't have a plan for recovery yet. My mind is all over the place. I can't think straight. Right now I really can't plan for anything except that I will NOT DRINK today. One day at a time.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Originally Posted by Mystary 
Thanks for all the replies. It kind of overwhelmed me. I almost cried. I have tears in my eyes. I am an emotional roller coaster. I am mad one minute and sad the next. It is a relief to know I am not alone.
I don't have a plan for recovery yet. My mind is all over the place. I can't think straight. Right now I really can't plan for anything except that I will NOT DRINK today. One day at a time.
I don't have a plan for recovery yet. My mind is all over the place. I can't think straight. Right now I really can't plan for anything except that I will NOT DRINK today. One day at a time.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
D
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
Tina, I'm sorry for the loss of both your parents. I believe your Dad would want you to live the best life you can, a sober life. It will get better, for sure. And, perhaps your husband will be inspired when he sees you doing so well.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Good to have you back with us, Mystary. I, too, am sorry for the loss you've suffered.
After a while we realize alcohol is not the friend we thought it was. It doesn't really help us cope - only makes us more anxious & miserable in the end. Even though we know this - in the early days of recovery we still fantasize that it might somehow calm us & bring relief. I remember at 2 wks. I was still a bit resentful and disoriented. Everything changed as I got used to my new life. It feels wonderful to be free. You will do this!
After a while we realize alcohol is not the friend we thought it was. It doesn't really help us cope - only makes us more anxious & miserable in the end. Even though we know this - in the early days of recovery we still fantasize that it might somehow calm us & bring relief. I remember at 2 wks. I was still a bit resentful and disoriented. Everything changed as I got used to my new life. It feels wonderful to be free. You will do this!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
Hi Tina,
I'm glad you are back! The link Dee posted is. Great one, it helps to have the support of others at the same point in their recovery journey as you.
Two weeks is fantastic, keep it up!!
I'm glad you are back! The link Dee posted is. Great one, it helps to have the support of others at the same point in their recovery journey as you.
Two weeks is fantastic, keep it up!!
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