Today I decided to stop drinking
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 12
Today I decided to stop drinking
Hi all
As the title says today I decided I will stop drinking alcohol, I have to stop.
For some background: I am 26 years old and from the UK. I was always a shy and quiet kid when growing up, I never really socialised with kids outside of school and never had a drink until I was 19. After my first drink it was like i found exactly what I was looking for; it made me confident as hell, talkative. I could socialise and not suffer from any kind of anxiety. At the time it seemed like it was all fun and brilliant times, and until recently I still felt that was the case. However looking back now it is clear that within 6 months of having that first drink I already had an unhealthy relationship with alcohol and other substances.
As a direct result of alcohol I have been kicked out of university twice, been arrested several times gaining a criminal record and very nearly going to prison, I have lost 7 jobs since I was 21 and I have stolen from family and burnt bridges with friends. I realise this has to come to an end and still a life without alcohol file me with dread.
I'm not the kind of alcoholic who will drink first thing, although I often have. I cannot properly process emotion while I'm sober; if I'm happy then I drink, anxious I drink, sad down or depressed I drink. The slightest bit of anxiety and I have to drink. I have social anxiety and worry that I am only any fun to be around when I'm drinking, I worry i will lose friends ifof stop drinking. I dont know how to socialise or have fun sober. In fact I hate being sober.
I am ready to stop drinking I really am, I just find the world a daunting place when with a sober mind.
Anyway thanks for reading, it feels good to got some thoughts down on paper/screen.
I hope you're well.
As the title says today I decided I will stop drinking alcohol, I have to stop.
For some background: I am 26 years old and from the UK. I was always a shy and quiet kid when growing up, I never really socialised with kids outside of school and never had a drink until I was 19. After my first drink it was like i found exactly what I was looking for; it made me confident as hell, talkative. I could socialise and not suffer from any kind of anxiety. At the time it seemed like it was all fun and brilliant times, and until recently I still felt that was the case. However looking back now it is clear that within 6 months of having that first drink I already had an unhealthy relationship with alcohol and other substances.
As a direct result of alcohol I have been kicked out of university twice, been arrested several times gaining a criminal record and very nearly going to prison, I have lost 7 jobs since I was 21 and I have stolen from family and burnt bridges with friends. I realise this has to come to an end and still a life without alcohol file me with dread.
I'm not the kind of alcoholic who will drink first thing, although I often have. I cannot properly process emotion while I'm sober; if I'm happy then I drink, anxious I drink, sad down or depressed I drink. The slightest bit of anxiety and I have to drink. I have social anxiety and worry that I am only any fun to be around when I'm drinking, I worry i will lose friends ifof stop drinking. I dont know how to socialise or have fun sober. In fact I hate being sober.
I am ready to stop drinking I really am, I just find the world a daunting place when with a sober mind.
Anyway thanks for reading, it feels good to got some thoughts down on paper/screen.
I hope you're well.
- I'm from the UK too 
sober style
Join Date: May 2016
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 2,382
Originally Posted by Darwinia 
Sometimes we just have to do things we do not want to do. Like be sober.
Good job on your decision to quit, justme. Sounds like alcohol isn't doing you any favors, and you're right to get shed of it. My life is about a million times better since I stopped drinking, highly recommended.
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Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 128
Welcome, JustMe. You have made a difficult but wise decision in sobering up. Thanks for posting. There are a lot of supportive and non-judgmental folks on this site. I find it really helpful to be here too.
Is it possible to clear your schedule for the next few days? It is kind of unfair to yourself to maintain a busy schedule while in early recovery. I know some folks don't have this luxury.
It is understandable to be concerned about losing friends. I guess my question would be this; How good of friends are they if their friendship is conditional on you being drunk? You mentioned that you've burnt bridges with some friends. I suppose those friends might be surprisingly supportive of your decision to sober up, aye?
Is it possible to clear your schedule for the next few days? It is kind of unfair to yourself to maintain a busy schedule while in early recovery. I know some folks don't have this luxury.
It is understandable to be concerned about losing friends. I guess my question would be this; How good of friends are they if their friendship is conditional on you being drunk? You mentioned that you've burnt bridges with some friends. I suppose those friends might be surprisingly supportive of your decision to sober up, aye?
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by DolAndel
Welcome, JustMe. You have made a difficult but wise decision in sobering up. Thanks for posting. There are a lot of supportive and non-judgmental folks on this site. I find it really helpful to be here too.
Is it possible to clear your schedule for the next few days? It is kind of unfair to yourself to maintain a busy schedule while in early recovery. I know some folks don't have this luxury.
It is understandable to be concerned about losing friends. I guess my question would be this; How good of friends are they if their friendship is conditional on you being drunk? You mentioned that you've burnt bridges with some friends. I suppose those friends might be surprisingly supportive of your decision to sober up, aye?
Is it possible to clear your schedule for the next few days? It is kind of unfair to yourself to maintain a busy schedule while in early recovery. I know some folks don't have this luxury.
It is understandable to be concerned about losing friends. I guess my question would be this; How good of friends are they if their friendship is conditional on you being drunk? You mentioned that you've burnt bridges with some friends. I suppose those friends might be surprisingly supportive of your decision to sober up, aye?
I didn't think of it like that, I suppose time will tell. I know it is only the first day but I've taken comfort reading some of the recovery stories on this site. I'll try to post regularly on here. I've found getting something written or types up helps me process things better.
Thanks again.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
Welcome aboard justme 
Do check out our Class of October support thread - it's for everyone quitting this month
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-thread-4.html
D
Do check out our Class of October support thread - it's for everyone quitting this month
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-thread-4.html
D
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 734
A very wise decision you have made there Justme and one that is necessary if drinking and drugs are causing you such problems, stay close to this place there's so much support here.
There's so much more to life - not the easiest thing to realise and accept but believe me we genuinely don't need it to have fun or socialise - can tell you there's definitely no fun in ending up locked up and away from your family through drunken escapades. Out of control those situations are relatively easy to find or they were for me anyway and as the years passed by those situations became more and more regular- in control not a chance.
Another here from the Uk too.
There's so much more to life - not the easiest thing to realise and accept but believe me we genuinely don't need it to have fun or socialise - can tell you there's definitely no fun in ending up locked up and away from your family through drunken escapades. Out of control those situations are relatively easy to find or they were for me anyway and as the years passed by those situations became more and more regular- in control not a chance.
Another here from the Uk too.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 12
Thanks for the kind words and support everyone.
Today the anxiety seems to have been ramped up, I'm on edge and feeling like I'm out of control od everything in my life. It is horrible. Last night I couldn't sleep at all. I just feel like I'm extremely scattered in thoughts and I don't know how to handle the anxiety.
In terms of support around me I have my Dad who has gone through recovery for drug addiction and my uncle who has gone through recovery for alcohol addiction, I am also planning on attending the next local AA meeting.
I am going to go for a run and try some meditation afterwards in an attempt to shift this anxiety and general blue feeling.
Thanks for reading.
Today the anxiety seems to have been ramped up, I'm on edge and feeling like I'm out of control od everything in my life. It is horrible. Last night I couldn't sleep at all. I just feel like I'm extremely scattered in thoughts and I don't know how to handle the anxiety.
In terms of support around me I have my Dad who has gone through recovery for drug addiction and my uncle who has gone through recovery for alcohol addiction, I am also planning on attending the next local AA meeting.
I am going to go for a run and try some meditation afterwards in an attempt to shift this anxiety and general blue feeling.
Thanks for reading.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 387
Hi justme, kudos for doing this so young. I wish I'd stopped when I was 26! The anxiety will pass. Just ride this day out. I'm also on day 2. I know it will pass. But I keep worrying about everything. My boss has been away this week and I've struggled to get any work done. And I think I drank on Wednesday because I felt so useless. But now I've wasted two whole days recovering. I have to work this weekend to make up for the lost time. Why do we do it to ourselves eh?
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by sadsadgirl
Hi justme, kudos for doing this so young. I wish I'd stopped when I was 26! The anxiety will pass. Just ride this day out. I'm also on day 2. I know it will pass. But I keep worrying about everything. My boss has been away this week and I've struggled to get any work done. And I think I drank on Wednesday because I felt so useless. But now I've wasted two whole days recovering. I have to work this weekend to make up for the lost time. Why do we do it to ourselves eh?
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 734
Sounds like you have a good focus for what is required and a plan, the guidance with other family members too is something that will be extremely helpful.
I've attended a few AA and also NA meetings too which seem to be a younger crowd and may also be a good fit for you too, something worth considering.
I'll re-iterate what SSG just said about the kudos for realising the need to sort things out at such a young age - something many of us knew should be the case but didn't attempt properly until much later - once you do and see things from a different perspective you'll realise just what a good decision you have made to put a stop to living like this - anxiety and feeling low is normal in the early stages but believe me it does get better much better - stick with it no matter what.
Good luck mate and look forward to seeing you around on here.
I've attended a few AA and also NA meetings too which seem to be a younger crowd and may also be a good fit for you too, something worth considering.
I'll re-iterate what SSG just said about the kudos for realising the need to sort things out at such a young age - something many of us knew should be the case but didn't attempt properly until much later - once you do and see things from a different perspective you'll realise just what a good decision you have made to put a stop to living like this - anxiety and feeling low is normal in the early stages but believe me it does get better much better - stick with it no matter what.
Good luck mate and look forward to seeing you around on here.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Welcome- how are you feeling this morning?
I am a devoted AA-er here and think it's a perfect idea for you to get started in your recovery.
Look at the Class of October thread in Newcomer's Daily Support section. There are plenty of threads and sections around here for you to go to find support. An IRL plan + SR is a super combination.
You can quit. If you do, you will find a much better life- I can promise you that. No matter what happens, you will be better off. Friends and situations can wait right now- the best thing you can do is not drink - for today. I say this because it's still my number one priority 228 days in.
Good luck.
I am a devoted AA-er here and think it's a perfect idea for you to get started in your recovery.
Look at the Class of October thread in Newcomer's Daily Support section. There are plenty of threads and sections around here for you to go to find support. An IRL plan + SR is a super combination.
You can quit. If you do, you will find a much better life- I can promise you that. No matter what happens, you will be better off. Friends and situations can wait right now- the best thing you can do is not drink - for today. I say this because it's still my number one priority 228 days in.
Good luck.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 12
The anxiety really is starting to set in now, I feel like I have been sucked punched. It doesn't help that I my phone has been going off all afternoon with friends inviting me out for a drink tonight, I have now turned my phone off and given it to my Dad.
The anxiety and fear is killing me though, I feel like anything else I could deal with it is just the anxiety.
The anxiety and fear is killing me though, I feel like anything else I could deal with it is just the anxiety.
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