A little down, but hey "I'm still alive!"
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Join Date: Jul 2013
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A little down, but hey "I'm still alive!"
Hello everyone! Feeling a little down and kind of want to share my story to get it off my chest. I've been living in St. Thomas for about the last two years with my girlfriend. I've been sober about half the time. The first year and a half my girlfriend and I had many of our friends and family come and visit us, which kept us pretty busy. The last 6 months we have not had many visitors and my girlfriend also started a new job. I started drinking more mainly binging when I knew I had the next day off. I definitely stayed up over night a few times and have made an ass out of myself on a few occasions. I would get myself in check and go a month or so without drinking and would feel great! Here's the thing though. During this time with her new job she was meeting new people and we all became friends. The problem is that these friends really do nothing with their spare time except drink at bars. I would go out with all of them and stay sober most of the time but when I did I would usually go home early. What started happening is that I started spending my time at home while she was out drinking with these friends. Well finally the stress of this made me want to go out and drink with them and have fun. Unfortunately, when I drink, I almost always binge. This just turned into embarrassing moments for myself. Finally, I went back to not drinking for a couple of weeks and then one day with a friend I got into a fender bender with our car while I was a little buzzed. I didn't get a DUI amazingly, but it was the straw that broke the back. She left me, but honestly our relationship had been a turd for the last 6 months anyway, no love life, or connection, no effort, no affection, which is the big one for me. I moved into my own spot and I am currently back to sobriety, and spending time with people that don't drink. I'm going to use my arsenal SR, recovery books, meditation, exercise, and I've got my mother for support. It's amazing how love and life can be such a rollercoaster some times. Way up, and way down. With the loops and such. I decided not to spend time around her or the other friends that we were hanging with. It just sucks sometimes to see them out because this is a tiny island and it happens a lot. Just feeling a little depressed which I know is normal... And just wanted to vent and tell my new story. Not going to drink though. Thanks for listening everyone and have a great rest of your sober weekend.
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