Joene23

I don't know if this is similar to anyone else but I am 14 days sober. I'm 29 and my drinking was exclusively on weekends. I would drink to excess including occasional black outs pretty regularly for about 8 years. I decided I needed to quit because I am deeply afraid I have destroyed my body and considerably shortened my life considering I also binged on narcotics here and there when the opportunity afforded itself. I have shared this with no one not even my wife who has seen a few of my less proud drinking moments. I have no meeting and no religion nor do I desire a religious alternative for a higher power. I do notice a change in my attitude in my appreciation for things since I've stopped drinking. The world seems a little brighter each day activities I haven't enjoyed since I simultaneously picked up beer and cigs I'm all the sudden enjoying again now that I put them both down at the same time. But that doesn't mean there isn't hard days. So much shame for things I've done while intoxicated.. The damage I have done to my life just to have a drink. I guess I'm posting this because I need someone to know. I need others to know my guilt even when I can't admit it to the people I love.

Dee74

Hi and welcome Joene - you'll find a lot of friends and a lot of support here

Would you consider other secular based recovery groups?
D

Joene23

I would however I'm quite busy. I have a really demanding career and finishing a B.S. in chemistry at the same time. Its hard for me to find time for sleep let alone a meeting. I'm actually kind of scared that I'll manage to go on a bender for a whole vacation and get nothing done or completely ignore my wife or worse.

Joene23

I'm actually currently at work as I write this.

MidnightBlue

Hi, Joene.

Welcome to SR!

It's' a great place of support and understandig. No one is going to judge you here.

You know, sense of guilt is not the most productive feeling in recovery and life overall. Learning from our mistakes and deciding to stay committed to building a new sober life is a better approach to this.

I was also alone when I quit. Almost 4 years after - still alone "in real world". And I am not religious by any stretch of imagination.

There are many options to stay sober of one really wants it.

SR was definitely my lifeline in early recovery (and beyond).

There's a secular section on the forum, as Dee has mentioned.

Read around.

And you are still so young to improve your health.

Best wishes to you.

countrysidegirl

hi come and join the class of September , thanks for such an honest post , your not alone

cwood3

Just be careful that alcohol/alcoholism doesn't sneak up and rob you of the things that make your life "too busy" because when it does, you become not busy...and that sucks

LadyBlue0527

Stop and consider your words. I'm glad you're here but start to realize how alcohol works.

The thought of attending any kind of meeting, secular or non secular is a no go because you're busy.

You found time to drink though.

You need to think about that in recovery.

LadyBlue0527

I should learn to never type on an Iphone. Please know that you've just joined the best support community going and that's a big start. It's safe here and we all can relate to what you're saying. I too was a weekend warrior. What a waste of time it was.

I wanted to update this message to tell you that there's a lot of great support here.

There will always be something that will make you too busy to work on a recovery plan but...........the more you work on recovery the easier it is. You have to find time to set things aside so that you can do this for yourself.

I completely understand the busy part, your words reminded me of myself and I too would say that I was too busy. But, I found time to drink.

I apologize if I conveyed what I was trying to say in any manner other than trying to help you.

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Joene!!

BrandonInCO

I found your words to be extremely profound! And entirely relevant. It's so true. We all certainly made time for alcohol, didn't we? Surely we can make time for things that will help us along. Very well said, LB!

Joene23, you and I are very similar. Age, drinking habits, religion (I'm 32, only ever drank on weekends, atheist). I also posted here almost 2 weeks ago when I would quit so I could get it out there. I almost didn't tell my fiancee, either. I was afraid that if I did, and I failed to hold to my commitment to quit, that I wouldn't be able to bear his disappointment.

I did end up telling him, though. It helps that he doesn't drink. He has been very supportive.

Is there a more specific reason you don't want to tell your wife?

Anna

There is often a lot of guilt and shame involved and it's hard to face that when we stop drinking. Believe that you can get through it. Posting here is a great idea for support, and you will find that people here use a variety of different methods to recover. For me, SR has been my lifeline.

Hevyn

Hi Joene. We're so glad to have you with us.

Please be proud of yourself for taking life saving steps toward sobriety. When I was 29 I was still many years away from admitting what you have. As a result, my life became chaos & I was drinking all day in the end - completely dependent on it. I had no one to talk to about what was going on - I was so busy trying to appear normal & hide my drinking. I appreciated having SR to come to and talk things over. It means the world to have the understanding we share here. Welcome.

Joene23

To clarify I was able to find time to drink before I began class. I now go to sleep at 7:30 am and wake for class at 11:30 am then head straight from class to work from 6:30pm till 6:30am. I spend saturday sleeping if im lucky enough to not have crashed my car on the way home then work again saturday night till sunday morning and then I do every bit of reading homework quiz for the rest of the week on sunday night that is if I havn't been called in to work more.

Dee74

Hi Joene

noones trying to get you to attend anything you don't want to, but stopping drinking is hard.

Staying sober will take a little effort and, probably, a little time too - even if it's just posting here

D

ccam1973

Welcome aboard Joene. This community has helped many, myself included. I haven't joined any group other than being a part of this wonderful place. It's taken complete commitment and getting my mind right, but I haven't had a drink in 26 months as of today. You can get there too.

Dig deep and use us to help you get where you want to be. This community revolves around support for each other.

Welcome to SR.

Quincy

Welcome Joene. I'm new here too. It's a great place. Lots of support, words of wisdom and it's available 24/7. Read around.

Berrybean

Welcome.

I think with recovery we don't necessarily need to put as many hours into it as we lost through our drinking, but getting a plan and taking some action, and spending a little time on it pays dividends. When we get well-er then other things just seem to go more smoothly, we sleep better, we spend less time on procrastination or in fear or anger. That time is well invested. Finding the willingness is like finding a key.

A wise old man walking through a forest chanced upon a woodcutter. The woods man had a huge pile of logs on his left and a small basket of logs that he had chopped on his right. He chopped and chopped, puffing, panting and sweating.
The wise man greeted him and said "Your axe is blunt. This is making life hard for you. Just over the river is a man who would help you to sharpen your axe. Come with me and I'll show you."
The wood-cutter rolled his eyes, incredulous. "Old man." He said. "Does it look to you like I have time to sharpen my axe??"

No one will sharpen our axe for us, and it won't get sharp by itself.

Wishing you all the best for your recovery. BB