Recognizing Anxiety
 

There are lots of posts regarding anxiety, and while some things are clearly anxiety to me (nerves/dread before a presentation, for example), I experience other things which I cannot classify and am wondering if some of you can help.

The thing I experience is - many nights as I am trying to fall asleep, my brain serves up painful or scary moments from my life over and over, like a skipping record. Sometimes these moments are drinking horrors, but sometimes they had nothing to do with my behavior - for instance, once I saw a loose dog tear out into the street and get suddenly hit by a car. Terrible moment and obviously impactful - but why does my brain insist on reliving these kinds of moments?

Is this also anxiety? Help! Just want to make it stop!

I believe what you are experiencing are racing thoughts. I have them as part of my ADHD and they bring on anxiety and panic attacks. It is like your mind won't turn off. It brings negativity to the forefront, bad feelings, bad experiences in the past, unresolved issues.

Check with a pdoc. There are pharmceutical ways to manage them or check with a therapist for behavioral ways.

Thanks.
I wonder what causes them in the first place? Ok, so when I get like that, I will think about my dad, a viet nam vet, and start to imagine all the horrible things HE has to re live in his mind, etc

It totally sucks and I just want to switch my brain and heart OFF sometimes!

I used to have the same thing - in the quiet of night, my brain went nuts, and sometimes I would even have a full-blown anxiety attack. Now that I've been sober a while, it doesn't happen very often. I find that guided meditation helps. There are lots on YouTube, and there are also phone apps. When your mind starts racing, put your headphones in and play a guided meditation tape.

The advice to consult a therapist is good, too. You might benefit from behavioral therapy, or even anti-anxiety meds. When my anxiety disorder was at its worst, I went on meds and they helped a ton. I don't need them anymore, because once I'd been sober a while the anxiety got better, and I also learned to let those thoughts go. It does take practice.

I suffered dreadfully from those dancing skeletons in early sobriety. Even though I may have had a successful day, as soon as my head hit the pillow, out they came.

A lot of it was vague memories of the sick things I did while drunk, and it made me feel quite lonely, even in an understanding place like AA. We talked about the general stuff, but not specifics, nor should we. As a result I thought I must be the worst person ever to come to AA and if they knew what I was really like they would kick me out. That filled me with fear, or anxiety if you like.

The solution was step 5, essentially confession, the very last thing I wanted to do. I discovered first of all that I was just an ordinary run of the mill alcoholic who did alcoholic things - what a relief, I wasn't the worst after all!

The second benefit was that the airing of the skeletons seemed to put them to sleep. They have not bothered me since. The night after my step 5 I slept like a baby. There were other benefits too, but it certainly solved the sleep problem.

I had not thought of step 5 - but thinking back, doing steps 4&5 put lots of those "dancing skeletons" to sleep for me, too.

A racing mind at night really isn't uncommon. Coming from someone that deals with extreme anxiety, I would define it as feeling that hell of coming off a bender, but having it set off sober in my case such as going into a store, standing in line, a waiting room etc,.. shakes, freaking out, thinking you are going to die,.. it isn't fun, thanks for sure.

Have you spoken to a Dr?

No soberwolf - not yet. Slowly but surely plowing through routine health care - eye exam scheduled, another dental visit - and I work full time, travel some and parent, so it is tricky.

I will put this on my to do list for October, though. Thanks to all and sorry if it is a weird question.

Thanks to all for the tips!!! I will try some of the meditation playlists!!!

Id be interested in those Meditation playlists too. Anyone willing to share a few links in this thread?

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Yes, this is anxiety and it's very painful. I have those kinds of thoughts when I am trying to go to sleep, and sometimes when I'm doing something wonderful, those negative thoughts pop in. Try to remember, they are just thoughts. They are not you and they don't control you. You can feel them and let them go.

This is an article posted long ago by Morning Glory and it's helped me enormously. It's a bit long, but very worth the read because you will learn that you can stop those thoughts before they take hold of you emotionally:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...anagement.html

Anna, that article is amazing! Thank you for posting - still digesting it.