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-   -   Drunk dialing/texting/facebooking.... (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/396836-drunk-dialing-texting-facebooking.html)

blink926 08-30-2016 10:06 AM

Drunk dialing/texting/facebooking....
 
You know how when we would drink we found it easy to call or text people that we would not normally call or text? I mean seriously, WHY?? I would wake up and find out that I had called a random old friend that I hadn't spoken to in years and not have a clue what we talked about. What is it about alcohol that makes us want to do that? There have been numerous times I have scrolled through texts from the night before and was horrified at all the people I had texted. Or the random Facebook posts that do not make sense. Its so mortifying. I was always afraid to look at my phone the next morning for fear of what I would find.

Anyone have stories of drunk dialing?
Stories like this can be another way to motivate us all to stay sober!

Michelle644 08-30-2016 10:19 AM

I was the worst for drunk dialing. I wouldn't even remember what I said I was always to embarrassed to ask the next day. I would also call people that I haven't spoke to in years and I would remember calling and that would be it....the blackout. Or, how about not even remembering calling and the next day you call that people and say, oh, did I tell you about..... and they say, you told me last night we talked about for an hour. Don't you remember? YIKES, embarrassing! Thank goodness I didn't do drunk face booking. Your not alone. No one hardly calls me anymore...I guess they are afraid I might be drunk. I enjoy reading stories like this too...it is a motivator. It helps keep me straight. I don't ever want to be that person again.

bexxed 08-30-2016 10:23 AM

Oh my god. Ok. So that's what brought me back and showed me that I really can't be trusted by myself to drink, because this other bexxed comes out and the real bexxed has to live with it later.

On August 10 I got mad about something, and saw a Facebook memories photo I had posted years ago. It was an elderly friend of mine who has since passed on. I loved this woman. She was incidentally not an alcoholic. But she is the person who introduced me to gin and tonics. So. I get home from work, down two big glasses of wine, and convince my gf to drive us to a restaurant for dinner. She gets a beer. I get a gin and tonic in honor of my friend, and have two more after that, and eat a little bit of dinner. Get home and talk my gf into making me more gin and tonics. How many? Three more? Four? I'm not sure. I go on Facebook and see some post from people I don't really know but have to sort of work with - call it business associates if you will. I decide that they are undermining a coworker of mine and send a drunken rant to one of them over PM. Except it was to one of THEIR coworkers, and I realize that after I send it. So I call a work friend at 11:30 pm when we both had to be at the office at 9, slurring and telling her I have just messed up and done this, and if I block that person, will they not see it. She was asleep and thought I had an emergency. Then I message a bunch of other people with the same thing and copy and paste the original text to them as well.

A few messaged back politely and others.... Ignored me.

There. I've said it. It makes me want to run far away that I did this. I woke up that morning hung over and hating myself. I posted here a post called "I don't like drunk me". What I meant was that I really want to kill drunk me. Being sober effectively does that.

I am thankful that I never have to do that again and THANK YOU for this post because I have not told anyone about it yet. I'm really paranoid about anonymity here so let's just say I didn't tell even all the details because they are identifying and that this was a really, really bad drunk texting/calling/facebooking endeavor.

B

soberfate 08-30-2016 10:25 AM

Oh this hit a nerve with me.....the morning after review of Facebook posts....ugh so awful. I would look at my posts and think I need to delete Facebook so I don't do this again. I would immediately delete my posts and vow never to do that again and then the next weekend would roll around and I would do it again. :(
Nothing I posted was bad or anything it's just that I would post things I wouldn't normally post sober. I like sober sooo much better :)

doggonecarl 08-30-2016 10:29 AM


Originally Posted by blink926 (Post 6114762)
Anyone have stories of drunk dialing?
Stories like this can be another way to motivate us all to stay sober!

I not sure how stories of shame or embarrassing acts can motivate sobriety. We all have drinking tales. Recovery is about moving beyond the shame of our drinking.

I am coming up to six years without a drink. If I could share anything with someone new to the forum or struggling it would be the feeling of not being enslaved by alcohol. But since I can't share a feeling, take my word for it, it feels great to not have to deal with the chaos, shame, and misery of drinking.

Zanna 08-30-2016 10:40 AM

Yes!! And waking up panicking at 4am to mass delete, praying that no-one has seen them :( Guilty!

january161992 08-30-2016 10:43 AM

like ive said for years thank god there was no internet then or i woulda never got sober


:thanks

Bunny211 08-30-2016 10:58 AM

Yes. I once (when highly intoxicated) emailed an old high school teacher, who I hadn't seen in 10 years, to tell her I had recently undergone bowel resection surgery. I was never close to this teacher. I didn't like her and she didn't like me. Why I emailed her, I have no clue. I still cringe to this day.

bexxed 08-30-2016 11:08 AM

Certainly not gonna even think I know more than someone with six years but it is helpful for me anyway, right now, to not forget why I stopped. Not to dwell in the past, but to not allow myself to entertain thoughts that picking up could be ok. Plus, some of that stuff was so bad (for me) that I couldn't even bring myself to say it. Saying it here allows me to accept that I can't change it, and focus on today, which I can change by staying sober today.

If I'm on the wrong track I wanna know but I thought it felt right.

Thank you doggone Carl :)

ScottFromWI 08-30-2016 11:11 AM

I did a lot of things that I'm ashamed of when I was drunk. And while I think it's important to remember the way I was now and then, I don't believe that I'll ever know "why" I did it. The only way I was able to get sober was to let go of the notion that I'd know why I am an alcoholic...I simply had to accept that I AM an alcoholic in order to get better.

bexxed 08-30-2016 11:17 AM

Yeah who the heck knows why we are alcoholics? I don't want to forget why I figured out I am one though. Because that's what feeds the denial. Again, don't want to dwell in it but remembering what events led to that acceptance makes the tendency to revise history much more difficult. Writing it down here allows for some accountability. I think that's what the OP was trying to do when they said "it could help motivate sobriety". At least that's how I took it.

blink926 08-30-2016 11:48 AM


Originally Posted by bexxed (Post 6114845)
Yeah who the heck knows why we are alcoholics? I don't want to forget why I figured out I am one though. Because that's what feeds the denial. Again, don't want to dwell in it but remembering what events led to that acceptance makes the tendency to revise history much more difficult. Writing it down here allows for some accountability. I think that's what the OP was trying to do when they said "it could help motivate sobriety". At least that's how I took it.

Yes Bexxed. You are exactly right. Its kinda like people who lose weight and see an old pic of themselves. It reminds them of why they don't want to go back. I think in the early stages of sobriety it is important to not lose track of why we became sober. It may be awful and depressing but it sure does help. When I have attended AA meetings in the past they always tell stories about things they did that led them to sobriety. It is a support group.it's accountability and It's not always positive. I am proud of you for sharing your story Bexxed and thank you everyone else who shared theirs. And Doggone Carl, SIX years is AMAZING!!!

Merotti 08-30-2016 01:42 PM

This! I certainly dont need access to a phone, internet, computer, tablet, doves, or a mailbox when drunk. I would post the most asinine stuff on Facebook during a drunken night. Hell I would trash talk the people I was with for the night on Twitter! Calling people at all hours and not remembering what was said, crying on the phone, its just too much. Alcohol definitely isn't my friend in the slightest.

Anna 08-30-2016 01:46 PM

I think it's good to remember we never have to go through this again.

nyala 08-30-2016 02:37 PM

And also to remember 'you' are not the *******.

You just behaved like an ******* behaves when drunk.

You don't have to do that anymore.

You can be you instead.

You = me of course.

PurpleKnight 08-30-2016 02:41 PM

Very glad to have reserved that part of my life to the archive . . . instead we can write a new chapter!! :)

kk1k5x 08-30-2016 03:05 PM

I basically developed a 'blue indicator light syndrome' after I got my first smartphone. This basically says it all, but for someone who has isolated for years on end, in this day and age, a lot of communication is (in majority) online with certain people. Saying inexplicable things to those people and then trying to figure out 'why' that happened ... it has, quite possibly, been the biggest single source of shame for me.

Not good to necessarily bring it up any time the opportunity strikes, but it is one of those 'stalwart' arguments to support NOT picking up the drink. All of us have 1+ drinking tales - yet, the quantity of horror it incites to think that (if you think about it) we no longer even have to leave our homes to completely embarrass ourselves in front of anywhere from 10-500 people is fairly enormous.

It too will pass, though.

LadyBlue0527 08-30-2016 03:12 PM

I lost a job where I made a higher end salary that you wouldn't see in these parts because of an email. Thought that just because I was personal friends with both owners that I could speak my peace and get away with it.

Nope.

Too many Facebook posts, texts, and calls under the influence to mention here.

So grateful that I never have to worry again.

DoneDying 08-30-2016 03:58 PM

Yeah, I once sent an e-mail to my boss in an airport bar. It was innocuous but almost unintelligible. This was years ago and I was carrying around a brand new iPhone about a week after it was first released, having just come from a Blackberry with a real keyboard. Luckily, my boss just laughed and said I really needed to learn how to type on that thing before sending out e-mails. Fiasco averted!

Jsbodhi 08-30-2016 04:02 PM

This is a huge motivator for me to quit drinking- I am the absolute worst for this.
And for me- these type of threads really help; because I start feeling good sober and forget the horrors!

I think if you don't like these threads- move on from them


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