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Old 08-08-2016, 08:44 AM
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Boredom

85 days into recovering and counting. The days, the hours the minutes the....

So far this journey has been relatively easy. Today however feels like hitting a wall. Everything feels....boring. I do what I enjoy namely working, reading, playing golf and watching the Olympics. I had a weekend away with sober friends and it was fine.

But today I really miss what I used to associate with boozing. Easy, silly, relaxing fun and talking ******** and laughing a lot and chilling. My really good friends are still drinkers and quite a few drink too much. As much as I used to drink. I miss hanging around with them. Sure I can still do, but not drinking makes it tedious.

I have made new friends at AA. They are nice enough but it feels as if all discussions only revolves around recovery. In all honesty, apart from being addicts in recovery we probably have nothing in common.

Tomorrow is a public holiday. Pre-recovery I would have had a party lined up for tonight knowing I can sleep late tomorrow. Instead I am going to AA and tomorrow I will go to work even though I am completely up to date.

I do not want to drink, but I do miss that particular vibe. I guess that is the cost of going so hard for so long.
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Old 08-08-2016, 08:58 AM
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Hi,

I just posted about the same thing, I am only at
the end of day three, but I am off work for the
summer. And already getting bored.

I think from reading on here and what I am feeling
now is also half the battle, booze is the addiction,
but it stopped us doing things we used to do. It is
more about just stopping drinking, it is a whole
lifestyle change.

Gonna go fishing for the first time since the 1980's
tomorrow.
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Old 08-08-2016, 08:59 AM
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BTW well done for the 85 days!!

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Old 08-08-2016, 09:02 AM
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Thanks Hammer. That is just the thing. Fishing without drinking...unthinkable and yet that is what we have to do. I know it is worth it but there are times when it really does not feel so.
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Old 08-08-2016, 09:05 AM
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yes! boredom. and yeah, I do menial things to fill the time - but still so b-o-r-e-d
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Old 08-08-2016, 09:07 AM
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I think it is because everything we did while
we drank always revolved around drinking
and when we could drink again.

It is/hopefully was, such a big part of our lives.
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Old 08-08-2016, 10:09 AM
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Originally Posted by Darwinia View Post
Thanks Hammer. That is just the thing. Fishing without drinking...unthinkable and yet that is what we have to do. I know it is worth it but there are times when it really does not feel so.
Lol. I love fishing and just being on the water. But something about being on the water with a cold beer is magical. That's literally probably the hardest place for me not to drink. Almost every social event I attend includes people drinking and I can typically handle that ok, but fishing, or being on a lake or at a river makes me crazy for a drink.
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Old 08-08-2016, 10:25 AM
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It does get easier. Fishing was a big one for me too. As well as many other things. A cold beer sounding good still pops into my head but it's easy to dismiss it. I'm almost 11 months sober.
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Old 08-08-2016, 11:13 AM
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Day 85 is fantastic!!

Here's a link for some activity ideas -
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ething-do.html
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Old 08-08-2016, 11:43 AM
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85 days is awesome . The flat bored cycles sometimes just seem to happen and we have to ride them out. I would rather be flat and bored than hungover and miserable
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Old 08-08-2016, 12:03 PM
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Originally Posted by Darwinia View Post
85 days into recovering and counting. The days, the hours the minutes the....

So far this journey has been relatively easy. Today however feels like hitting a wall. Everything feels....boring. I do what I enjoy namely working, reading, playing golf and watching the Olympics. I had a weekend away with sober friends and it was fine.

But today I really miss what I used to associate with boozing. Easy, silly, relaxing fun and talking ******** and laughing a lot and chilling. My really good friends are still drinkers and quite a few drink too much. As much as I used to drink. I miss hanging around with them. Sure I can still do, but not drinking makes it tedious.

I have made new friends at AA. They are nice enough but it feels as if all discussions only revolves around recovery. In all honesty, apart from being addicts in recovery we probably have nothing in common.

Tomorrow is a public holiday. Pre-recovery I would have had a party lined up for tonight knowing I can sleep late tomorrow. Instead I am going to AA and tomorrow I will go to work even though I am completely up to date.

I do not want to drink, but I do miss that particular vibe. I guess that is the cost of going so hard for so long.
Early sobriety is known as a rollercoaster time as its full of twists & turns & ups & down this is why a lot of people struggle with the initial 6-12 month period but I can guarantee you from experience youl soon start experiencing all the good stuff that I promise

Don't let the FOMO (fear of missing out) hold you back in sobriety everything has a time & a place I myself just kept working on myself I've seen too many not make it, die even & I'm only 34 it ain't right it just is

Stick with it & big congrats on nearing your 90 day milestone
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Old 08-08-2016, 12:19 PM
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I can completely relate to your post (close behind you at 73 days), especially the part about AA. I haven't been to a meeting recently, but I remember thinking that I seemed to have nothing in common with other people, aside from recovery. Of course, in my case I didn't try very hard to get to know anyone.

RE: boredom, I've started something recently that has helped a bit. Whenever I'm feeling restless and uncomfortable in my skin (in the past I would always drink), I tell myself I can 1) rest, 2) do something productive, or 3) do something for my own self-care. Often, it's rest, but I tell myself "when nothing works, do nothing" or something equally cliché. It does help me to refocus for the few moments it takes for the idea of drinking to pass.
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Old 08-08-2016, 12:23 PM
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I know the feeling of the boredom aspect!!!! I love having a
good time which to me seemed like drinking to relax!!
It's like well now what!! 85 days is awesome!! Congrats!!
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Old 08-08-2016, 12:33 PM
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Thanks guys. At AA tonight I mentioned the feeling bored thing. Perhaps I did not express myself well because everyone took it as feeling lonely and wanted to go for coffee with me. I am not lonely, I am bored. Especially when I am with people. Sigh. I know it will get better and I know I am not turning back. Thanks to people on this forum.
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Old 08-08-2016, 12:46 PM
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Congratulations on 85 days, you are nearing the 90 day mark which is a huge milestone!!

I think we all have certain activities/events that we usually did while drinking and now that we are doing them sober we are adjusting. I am just over seven months now and there are certain events throughout the year which use to involve me drinking. I figure once I hit the one year mark I will have gone through each possible event/season sober.

Hang in there, it gets easier as time passes.
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Old 08-08-2016, 12:56 PM
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For me it comes and goes, things I love to do become boring from time to time, my better half and I just returned from holidays on our boat, I was so friggin bored of boating after three days.....but the boredom only lasted for a day and I was fine again.

I think we just acknowledge it for what it is knowing it will not last.

Andrew
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