can't study due to anxiety
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Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
can't study due to anxiety
I have an assessment due in 6 days and can't study due to insomnia and panic attacks. I knew the first week after a relapse would be bad but this is nearly unbearable. I've been told by my doctor not to drink coffee as it is pushing my blood pressure into the dangerous range. How am I supposed to stay awake with no sleep? Maybe I need to quit college and focus on my sobriety. Besides getting wasted to get some sleep, I see no other alternative.
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: NC
Posts: 662
I know things might seem impossible now..but don't give up..things WILL get better. The place you are in today is not the place you will be in tomorrow or the next day. Do not make any rash decisions- do not give up on yourself- FIGHT for your goals and refuse to let anything stop you. Remember this feeling, write it down, and next time you think about drinking remember this moment..this desperation..this pain and suffering and it might help make this the LAST time you are in this position.
Caffeine and sugar do make insomnia and panic attacks worse. It helps if you work out, even if you don't want to- the chemicals that get released when you work out will make you feel better for a little bit and can help you get some sleep. Even if you can't sleep, lay down and close your eyes- I know it is hard but that is the best way to help your body get SOME rest. Your doctor is not willing to help you with any these issues? There are certain medicines that can be given to those recently sober for short term and long term use- maybe it is time to get a doctor that specializes in addiction? (I have personally found that the difference is huge).
Hang in there, things will get better. I know it is hard to allow our bodies to heal and that we want to feel better RIGHT NOW but that is why making this your last time you will go through this is so important.
Caffeine and sugar do make insomnia and panic attacks worse. It helps if you work out, even if you don't want to- the chemicals that get released when you work out will make you feel better for a little bit and can help you get some sleep. Even if you can't sleep, lay down and close your eyes- I know it is hard but that is the best way to help your body get SOME rest. Your doctor is not willing to help you with any these issues? There are certain medicines that can be given to those recently sober for short term and long term use- maybe it is time to get a doctor that specializes in addiction? (I have personally found that the difference is huge).
Hang in there, things will get better. I know it is hard to allow our bodies to heal and that we want to feel better RIGHT NOW but that is why making this your last time you will go through this is so important.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,368
Besides getting wasted to get some sleep, I see no other alternative.
The AV is shameless it will use any justification it can to get you to drink again - passing assessments and not sleeping are both reasons I have used to drink again.
It will probably come as no surprise for you to learn drinking didn't help me pass my exams or assessments...it usually just meant more drinking
and it didn't stop me from waking suddenly at 3am full of shame and guilt because I'd drunk again.
If you're like me you can get a lot done in 6 days no matter how you feel - but if you feel really bad you could always get a medical note to help you apply for an extension for your assessment? (the note needn't mention withdrawal or alcoholism)
D
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Maybe it's time to have an honest discussion with someone at college - your tutor or whoever. (Not sure who, but the same person you would contact in the case of any other medical issue that would affect your course and your studies). Tell then what the situation is, and see what help they are able and willing to offer. This might be extended deadlines for a while, so you can get back on your feet.
However, my feeling, reading your post, and remembering early recovery, is that you are getting over fearful about this assignment, with probably a little dollop of alcoholic all-or-nothing-perfectionism chucked in.
Okay, so perhaps you're not going to be able to do your best ever work just now - so you might getter a lower mark than usual. It might not even be a pass. But you can still do your best as it is right now. And the college will see that you are at least trying, despite being far from best of health. Yes. You are tired. But if you can still engage in rationalisation about why you shouldn't do the assignment, then you're probably able to do the assignment.
If you left college (on a whim) what would you do instead? Sit around moping , listening to your AV harp on about how sobriety made you flunk college, so you might as well drink ??
Break the assignment down into some smaller questions that address the assignment topic. Then you can deal with one of those questions at a time, answering it in bullet points. If there is time at the end then turn those bullets into paragraphs, and if not, at least you have something to turn in that reflects your understanding of said topic, even if your presentation and format might not be on top form. I suspect that once you get going on it you will feel much better, and it will act as a distraction from thinking about drinking and not drinking, etc.
However, my feeling, reading your post, and remembering early recovery, is that you are getting over fearful about this assignment, with probably a little dollop of alcoholic all-or-nothing-perfectionism chucked in.
Okay, so perhaps you're not going to be able to do your best ever work just now - so you might getter a lower mark than usual. It might not even be a pass. But you can still do your best as it is right now. And the college will see that you are at least trying, despite being far from best of health. Yes. You are tired. But if you can still engage in rationalisation about why you shouldn't do the assignment, then you're probably able to do the assignment.
If you left college (on a whim) what would you do instead? Sit around moping , listening to your AV harp on about how sobriety made you flunk college, so you might as well drink ??
Break the assignment down into some smaller questions that address the assignment topic. Then you can deal with one of those questions at a time, answering it in bullet points. If there is time at the end then turn those bullets into paragraphs, and if not, at least you have something to turn in that reflects your understanding of said topic, even if your presentation and format might not be on top form. I suspect that once you get going on it you will feel much better, and it will act as a distraction from thinking about drinking and not drinking, etc.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
Hey All,
I ended up picking up again to get some sleep. Now I'm finding that I can't do my assignment at all from bad hangovers. What is the answer? Flunk out due to no sleep or flunk out due to drinking. I was making some progress when I first picked up again but now are going nowhere fast. Has anyone else had experience with assessments that they seemed to be only able to do while drunk? I think it is because of my chronic anxiety. My doctor put me on blood pressure pills due to the increased stress.
I ended up picking up again to get some sleep. Now I'm finding that I can't do my assignment at all from bad hangovers. What is the answer? Flunk out due to no sleep or flunk out due to drinking. I was making some progress when I first picked up again but now are going nowhere fast. Has anyone else had experience with assessments that they seemed to be only able to do while drunk? I think it is because of my chronic anxiety. My doctor put me on blood pressure pills due to the increased stress.
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Join Date: Jul 2016
Posts: 350
Originally Posted by Soberwolf 
Is there a college addiction point of contact on campus?
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Join Date: Jul 2016
Posts: 350
Talking to your teacher might be a start. I did not realized you are in Australia, but as I understand, laws are much the same as ours.
You might want to look through your college's listings of students services for a first contact (might be an Ombudsman?) or some other office. You might even call anonymously with some questions before you decide on a plan. I did a very quick search of disabled student rights in Australian colleges, and it would seems that psychiatric disorders are included - but please don't rely on a quick search from a stranger as a guarantee. Your doctor knows and should help you with this, I think.
Good luck, dear
You might want to look through your college's listings of students services for a first contact (might be an Ombudsman?) or some other office. You might even call anonymously with some questions before you decide on a plan. I did a very quick search of disabled student rights in Australian colleges, and it would seems that psychiatric disorders are included - but please don't rely on a quick search from a stranger as a guarantee. Your doctor knows and should help you with this, I think.
Good luck, dear
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