My AV is whispering lies
 

I have a party to go to tonight. I'm only 9 days sober so would not normally go as there will be lots of very heavy drinking, but this party is for families whose kids have grown up together since kindergarten, kind of a send off to college for our kids (who will be there too).
I've given in and given up on sobriety with these friends before and I don't want to do that. My av is telling me how fun it would be to just relax and have fun and reminisce, how having a drink won't kill me (tonight) and will make me feel closer to my husband (who no doubt will be shaking martinis for all the guests). It's telling me I have no confidence without alcohol and nothing to say, that I'm working hard on myself and deserve to let loose.
I am planning on only making an appearance and leaving, but my av is telling me how pathetic that is and I need friends and I shouldn't isolate myself.
I have to be there in half an hour and I am very near tears. Could use some words of wisdom and support please

Go in your bedroom, shut the door and scream bloody murder at your AV in a pillow. It can whisper all it wants but you can take control by overpowering it with your voice. Venting frustration helps get it out. Keeping it in makes it build up like a tornado.

Then go to the event and don't drink. No matter what.

I was just posting in the June thread that I have a LOT of trouble connecting that first sip with an inevitable downfall that will take me lower than ever before. Although I'm struggling, one thing that helps me when I'm tempted to romanticize drinking is to think about the WORST, most LOWDOWN moment where I am drinking something/somewhere/or in a manner that is inconceivable to me now that I have some distance in sobriety...that, and remembering that cravings are not permanent and can be observed and ridden out. Please come back and post how you beat this thing! (((hugs)))

Point blank don't go hun it's way to early

I'd make an appearance and then slip out the back door and go home,

Please don't drink.... Trust me it ain't worth it,

The priority has to be to protect your Sobreity at all costs, no compromises, if it's too much and you're cutting deals already that may be a sign going could be a disaster.

But if you are going make it brief, alcohol doesn't make who we are, aren't you going to celebrate your kids? be proud of them, talk about them, you have many things to talk about and feel a sense of achievement about!! :)

I wouldn't go.

Have a migraine. Stay home.

I wrote in your other thread Eliasson but there's good advice here.
Listen to your heart on this.

D

Toooooo soon.

Thank you all so very much. I stayed for an hour and a half and drank water the whole time. Really big accomplishment :). I'm home alone now but grateful, I could already see the glaze come into the others eyes and I get to wake up sober tomorrow. Tonight I got to honor my son AND my sobriety.

Fantastic. And tomorrow will be day 10, not another dreaded day 1. Proud of you...

Way to go! You did it.

Thats great news Eliasson :)
Stay vigilant - my AV got me a few times in the days after a success...stay focused :)

D

Way to kick some AV butt!
I've seen a lot of people make the comment about the AV making a comeback a few days after overcoming an early challenge, so maybe keep that in mind. But that said , awesome sober muscle building tonight. Good on ya

Ok thank you so much for the warning I had no idea.
Thank you too for all of the support :)

Me too. I'd make it through a big event with my guard up and be so relieved when it was over I'd believe that rascal's lies about rewarding myself for getting through the previous event.

My AV is a liar 24/7/365 - not just when there's a big event.

Well done to you. :You_Rock_

Hi Elliason, I went to my "pre" class reunion the other night at a bar. I went in and had 2 diet cokes said hi to my classmates, and left. My sanity is more important than people I see every 5 years.

I think you started your period and need to stay home and drink tea, or you are taking anti - biotics and can't drink for awhile.

Win win!

Way to go...