Think it's time to admit that I am an alcoholic
 

Pretty common story I imagine.

Didn't drink until I was 18 at all and then I got a job which involved a lot of travelling and people I weren't used to.
These were really easy to get along with people and they drank and smoked weed, so to fit it I decided to drink with them.

Weed was never my thing and I've never touched any other drugs, just alcohol.

Started off just having two pints before a nightshift to help us to get some sleep beforehand and rapidly escalated into half a small bottle (330ml) of vodka a day.
Once again, just to fit in.

As I got more confident in myself, over time I found I didn't drink to fit in, I drank because I enjoyed it.

Those people eventually left the company and I became friends with some new people who enjoyed a pub lunch every day.
No big deal right? A meal and a pint during lunch?
Except I would usually have two or three pints plus some shots.
I was having fun and it made the day faster.

Eventually these people also left and my next group of friends introduced me to buying Super skol and K cider from the off-licences at lunchtime.
It was cheaper and the buzz was the same.
Soon it wasn't enough and I was going to the offie during every break for super strength.

Sure enough these people also left the company eventually but the habits continued.
With nobody to drink with, I'd go drink on my own but now I was adding in drinking after work too.
I also started drinking heavily at the weekend.

The weekends would start with 10 units before lunchtime and later on I'd go get more and more.

But, I didn't see it as a problem. Everyone I worked with were drinking every day so big deal right?

This morning I have realised I have a problem.
Simple enough, someone said something that upset me yesterday (It was non alcohol related) and I drank myself into a stupor.
Waking up I feel fine. No hangover.

But I realised how stupid that was. It cost me around fourty pound yesterday. Money I don't really have all because of a minor thing.

Alcohol has become my crutch (and if I am honest, my life) and I need to stop it.

Hi and welcome prinnyruler :)

My alcohol use kinda crept up on me too until I was drinkign all dsay every day.
It;s never too later to turn things around tho - and you'll find a lot of support here :)

Have you tried to quit before?

D

Thanks for the welcome :)

I've never tried actively to quit before, no.
I did have a two month period where I was on medication and was told not to drink.

I tried for a while to try to trick myself by drinking non alcoholic beers and wines but it only lasted about two weeks.
Everyone else was drinking and I missed the buzz.

Absolutely spot on regarding it creeping up on you. It's just one of those things that start off as normal and then suddenly blam, it's constant state of drinking and thinking that's fine.

I think support makes a difference. It did for me anyway.

Because my whole life was about drinking I basically had to change a lot of things - and it made a difference to know I wasn't alone.

In the early days I just took it day by day - it's a good way to start - day one :)

D

Welcome Prinny, that post is very insightful of you. Lots of information and support around here. Glad you are joining us

Welcome to SR!

Welcome Prinnyruver , I relate 100 % to the progression I remember too the super lagers and ciders and gruing I. v. 1. To shudder, shiver, turn cold, from some emotion, gen. that of fear or repulsion (Sc. 1808 Jam.). Vbl.n. grewin, gruing, grooing, a shivering sensation, as of terror. Gen.Sc.) at the first long slug .

I remember having lots of friends in my teen years and early 20s but as my drinking progressed I became a lonely drinker , the fun had gone replaced by arguments and misery .
For us alcoholics there is no fun in drinking , not any more .

Keep coming here and don't be afraid to ask anything or reach out .

Glad you're here!! A lot, maybe most of us, had the creep! However we got here, here we are and we don't drink anymore. It sounds like you have not faced truly big consequences- money, that is solvable!- so I'm glad you're looking at your drinking problem now.

What's your plan for today? Since you don't feel bad, what will you do? I mean that in maybe thinking about an AA meeting or studying program options (you're across the pond so I don't know what's immediately available) and in the practical sense- what you do with your time.

Make it a great day. Good luck in your sober path, and hope to see you around.

Welcome to the Forum Prinnyruler!! :wave:

Welcome to the family. :) I hope the awesome support here can help you get sober for good. :)

Welcome!!!!
Alcohol is super sneaky! Everything seems fine and before you know it you notice you're in a bad spot.
This site has great resources xoxo

Happy to meet you, Prinny. It took me way too long to admit I was dependent on it. I'm glad you're ready to get free. There's no telling what will happen once it's in our system. Welcome!

Once again, thanks for all the welcomes people :)

Well I lasted a flipping day before I had a bottle of wine last night because of some stupid craving.
I will say though that I didn't enjoy it at all which made me think"why do it if you don't like it"?
Plus the sight of a workmate falling asleep (from too much alcohol all day) at 6pm in a noisy bright room made me wonder if that's what I look like when drunk.
It really didn't look good

I must double my efforts to beat the cravings

Prinnyruler, Thanks for sharing your story! It takes a lot to admit you have a problem with alcohol, especially as you said, it's generally accepted to drink (alot!). I can relate to some of what you say, what used to give me a hangover now barely registers so I have to stop. If you want, come and join us in August 2016 room. Lots of people there who give support.

There are some great tips for dealing with cravings here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

I also cant overstress the great benefit of beig part of the SR community...if you're feeling wobbly let us help you talk yourself out of it.

Just because we feel the craving doesn't mean we have to scratch that itch - far from it :)

D

Welcome to the forum and congrads on taking a first big and in my experience critical step to keeping this sickness at bay.

Your story mirror's mine pretty close, alcohol use crept up on me and by the time I was ready to admit I had a problem it was a full blown problem in every area of my life, good news is we can recover but the key is to never drink again.

All the best
Andrew

Welcome Prinny. Remembering HALT is helpful. Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. Avoid those! Try to eat something when you feel a craving. Best to you!