What keeps me sober? Weekender July 29th Part 1
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
What keeps me sober? Weekender July 29th Part 1
I think it's always been helpful for me to look at both ends of addiction. I have beat myself silly with reasons why I should drink. They range from the ridiculous like "it's such a nice sunny day today". To the more complex reasons around trauma and self medicating. No matter how I document the reasons to excuse my out of control drinking... I found I must also say what keeps me sober. There cannot be a down without an up now can there?
I will freely admit. Health? Money? Family relationships? Friendships? None deemed "enough" to say no to drinking and drugs. So how was I to "convince" myself that there are valid reasons to stay sober?
I have come to understand that the "reasons" to stay sober don't come in the form of reasons at all. Reasons are like excuses. They are a sound bite of reality.
It's in the feeling and experiencing of a life lived sober that makes me find the hope for tomorrow. That if I could not drink for this moment, that tomorrow will be better. If I could not drink in the last few hours. That time of day that haunts me always, then perhaps there is real hope. Hope then becomes tangible.
There is hope. You can stay sober past that god awful time of day... whatever that time is for you... You can.
What keeps me sober is the sobriety of the last few minutes. Nothing on a grand scale. Just that the moment to moment realization that I can do this. Not a week in advance or longer. But moment to moment. Then I get to look up and see that there is a life worth living staring at me.
That's what keeps me sober.
What makes you want to be on SR? No one who doesn't want to heal or stop or try shows up here. No one. Only those that want more. Those that have hope arrive here. You reading this is proof.
Welcome to your sober weekend!
Ken
I will freely admit. Health? Money? Family relationships? Friendships? None deemed "enough" to say no to drinking and drugs. So how was I to "convince" myself that there are valid reasons to stay sober?
I have come to understand that the "reasons" to stay sober don't come in the form of reasons at all. Reasons are like excuses. They are a sound bite of reality.
It's in the feeling and experiencing of a life lived sober that makes me find the hope for tomorrow. That if I could not drink for this moment, that tomorrow will be better. If I could not drink in the last few hours. That time of day that haunts me always, then perhaps there is real hope. Hope then becomes tangible.
There is hope. You can stay sober past that god awful time of day... whatever that time is for you... You can.
What keeps me sober is the sobriety of the last few minutes. Nothing on a grand scale. Just that the moment to moment realization that I can do this. Not a week in advance or longer. But moment to moment. Then I get to look up and see that there is a life worth living staring at me.
That's what keeps me sober.
What makes you want to be on SR? No one who doesn't want to heal or stop or try shows up here. No one. Only those that want more. Those that have hope arrive here. You reading this is proof.
Welcome to your sober weekend!
Ken
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Vman welcome! To SR and the weekender. We have turtles... One really. We have spiders. Frogs welcome!
Gatorman this is not my weekender. This is our weekender. Always good to see you jumping in. Must be over a month now for you correct?
Flossy... Welcome! Good to see you! I love cooking and we have a real honest to goodness chef Melina who is a weekender. Share some cooking ideas here as well with us.
K
Gatorman this is not my weekender. This is our weekender. Always good to see you jumping in. Must be over a month now for you correct?
Flossy... Welcome! Good to see you! I love cooking and we have a real honest to goodness chef Melina who is a weekender. Share some cooking ideas here as well with us.
K
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
In!
Word.
Originally Posted by Weasel1966 
What makes you want to be on SR? No one who doesn't want to heal or stop or try shows up here. No one. Only those that want more. Those that have hope arrive here. You reading this is proof.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 3,010
Thanks for the lovely post Weasel and congratulations on shotgun Behan.
At work this morning. Opened the local newspaper to see my Grandmother's picture staring up at me from the 'anniversaries' section. I kind of knew it would be there but I still got this lump in my throat.
Well the vascular team had their usual breakfast meeting and they had crepes left over so they sent some over to us. So I've had a crepe and I'm on my second Americano. Because sometimes you have to take things hour by hour and be grateful for the little things in life.
I hope you all have a nice day dear friends x
At work this morning. Opened the local newspaper to see my Grandmother's picture staring up at me from the 'anniversaries' section. I kind of knew it would be there but I still got this lump in my throat.
Well the vascular team had their usual breakfast meeting and they had crepes left over so they sent some over to us. So I've had a crepe and I'm on my second Americano. Because sometimes you have to take things hour by hour and be grateful for the little things in life.
I hope you all have a nice day dear friends x
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
Life IS worth living. And you can't live life if you are not 'there'. Being in an altered state of mind constantly is not 'being there'. I missed so much by 'not being there'.
I'm here now. I appreciate life now.
I finished watching the BBC "LIFE" series last night - netflix. Good stuff, it's about animals and nature. They were kind enough to add a short series of 'behind the scenes' footage. In case you've ever wondered 'How did they get those shots?' it answers that question. And shows the dedication required to complete the filming. One episode took over three years before they finally got the footage they wanted/needed. Amazing stuff.
It's kind of like the journey many take through sobriety. They didn't give up, they finally got it.
Never give up. Keep working until you finally get it. You are worth it.
It took a traumatic life experience for me to finally 'get it'. It was an event. And my decision to stop drinking was also an event. It really was that, an event. I made the decision to stop, just like that. It was an event.
Some call it their 'bottom'. Call it what you want, but you don't have to wait for such a life changing event in your life for you to finally make the decision to change direction. Don't rely on luck. For some, that life changing event ends their life. You see it every day on the news...
Raise the bar on what you consider 'rock bottom'.
I'll share a story about my wife. A few years ago at a party she got drunk. Fall down drunk. She had the worst hangover ever and it lasted a couple days.
That was her bottom. She never took a drink since that time. Yep, she quit before I did. And she wasn't an every day drinker and rarely drank more than a few here and there. I've seen her 'drunk' on two, maybe three occasions - that's it. And it was the silly 'tipsy' kind of drunk. Yet, the one time she got 'hammered' and felt bad for a few days after was enough for her to say no more. I amazed at her for being able to change because it took one time, ONE TIME, to experience that feeling to just say, 'NO MORE'. Yet, I experienced that feeling a thousand times over but still continued. What's my point? If you don't like how it makes you feel, or what it does to your life, that should be the only reason you need to stop.
Don't wait till you lose the wife or husband, lose the job, go bankrupt, wreck the car into a tree, fall down and crack your skull, lose all your friends etc. If you are reading this, you already have a reason to stop.
So just do it. STOP DRINKING NOW. And never drink again. It's that simple.
I'm here now. I appreciate life now.
I finished watching the BBC "LIFE" series last night - netflix. Good stuff, it's about animals and nature. They were kind enough to add a short series of 'behind the scenes' footage. In case you've ever wondered 'How did they get those shots?' it answers that question. And shows the dedication required to complete the filming. One episode took over three years before they finally got the footage they wanted/needed. Amazing stuff.
It's kind of like the journey many take through sobriety. They didn't give up, they finally got it.
Never give up. Keep working until you finally get it. You are worth it.
It took a traumatic life experience for me to finally 'get it'. It was an event. And my decision to stop drinking was also an event. It really was that, an event. I made the decision to stop, just like that. It was an event.
Some call it their 'bottom'. Call it what you want, but you don't have to wait for such a life changing event in your life for you to finally make the decision to change direction. Don't rely on luck. For some, that life changing event ends their life. You see it every day on the news...
Raise the bar on what you consider 'rock bottom'.
I'll share a story about my wife. A few years ago at a party she got drunk. Fall down drunk. She had the worst hangover ever and it lasted a couple days.
That was her bottom. She never took a drink since that time. Yep, she quit before I did. And she wasn't an every day drinker and rarely drank more than a few here and there. I've seen her 'drunk' on two, maybe three occasions - that's it. And it was the silly 'tipsy' kind of drunk. Yet, the one time she got 'hammered' and felt bad for a few days after was enough for her to say no more. I amazed at her for being able to change because it took one time, ONE TIME, to experience that feeling to just say, 'NO MORE'. Yet, I experienced that feeling a thousand times over but still continued. What's my point? If you don't like how it makes you feel, or what it does to your life, that should be the only reason you need to stop.
Don't wait till you lose the wife or husband, lose the job, go bankrupt, wreck the car into a tree, fall down and crack your skull, lose all your friends etc. If you are reading this, you already have a reason to stop.
So just do it. STOP DRINKING NOW. And never drink again. It's that simple.
Mini Novel Post Writer
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
Wow Ken, what an inspiring post! A great read to start the day and to head into the sober weekend, I am in!
What makes me want to be on SR?
When I see posts from those who are struggling I hope to help by offering words of hope. I see myself in those posts and it keeps me mindful that working on my recovery can never take a back seat. That, and the knowledge I am not alone in this journey.
When I see posts from those who have reached milestones, be it an hour, a day, a week, month, or year, I am encouraged that there is hope. Hope for anyone who wants to be sober that this CAN be done. That, and the knowledge I am not alone in this journey.
When I see posts from those who have chosen to return my heart grows a few sizes. I am relieved for them and grateful that they've found their way back. That, and the knowledge that I am not alone in this journey.
Indeed, I am not alone and there is strength in numbers. This board is my daily inspiration and to be a part of sharing in a common goal is powerful. We all learn from each other and it's an essential part of recovery.
We are not alone.
Have a great day everyone
What makes me want to be on SR?
When I see posts from those who are struggling I hope to help by offering words of hope. I see myself in those posts and it keeps me mindful that working on my recovery can never take a back seat. That, and the knowledge I am not alone in this journey.
When I see posts from those who have reached milestones, be it an hour, a day, a week, month, or year, I am encouraged that there is hope. Hope for anyone who wants to be sober that this CAN be done. That, and the knowledge I am not alone in this journey.
When I see posts from those who have chosen to return my heart grows a few sizes. I am relieved for them and grateful that they've found their way back. That, and the knowledge that I am not alone in this journey.
Indeed, I am not alone and there is strength in numbers. This board is my daily inspiration and to be a part of sharing in a common goal is powerful. We all learn from each other and it's an essential part of recovery.
We are not alone.
Have a great day everyone
I look young for my age.
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 932
Good morning all. I'm on the bus and ready to go.
This week of stressful work in a strange city far from home has reinforced how important SR has become for me even in the short time I've been here. I read new posts and comment where I have something to say, but since I'm still new to sobriety I mostly just try to soak in the wisdom and advice of others. I'm grateful I've found this thread and all you fine people, because I value the comradery.
I like the idea of being motivated to stay sober merely by reflection upon the minutes and hours I have just spent sober. I've come to realize that, even on the worst, most stressful days, my life is happier as a sober person. Seems simple to say, but it has been through that constant reminder and reinforcement that I've been able to stay sober for the longest time in years. SR serves as a tool in that constant reminding, and through this constant reinforcement, the motivation and will to stay sober continues to strengthen with each passing hour.
Happy sober weekend to all, thread veterans and newbs alike.
This week of stressful work in a strange city far from home has reinforced how important SR has become for me even in the short time I've been here. I read new posts and comment where I have something to say, but since I'm still new to sobriety I mostly just try to soak in the wisdom and advice of others. I'm grateful I've found this thread and all you fine people, because I value the comradery.
I like the idea of being motivated to stay sober merely by reflection upon the minutes and hours I have just spent sober. I've come to realize that, even on the worst, most stressful days, my life is happier as a sober person. Seems simple to say, but it has been through that constant reminder and reinforcement that I've been able to stay sober for the longest time in years. SR serves as a tool in that constant reminding, and through this constant reinforcement, the motivation and will to stay sober continues to strengthen with each passing hour.
Happy sober weekend to all, thread veterans and newbs alike.
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
I'm on the bus!
Wonderful intro, Ken, and great stuff from everyone else.
What keeps me sober, and coming here, is that I see people with more time than I have continuing to gain insight, peace, and serenity. I want those things. When drinking, I have none of that. I always wanted to be a true grown-up - taking life's challenges in stride, and dealing with things in a measured way. Not hiding away and ducking responsibility, trying to avoid the tough stuff. I feel that in sobriety, I can step up and take care of myself, my family, my "stuff." I like that, very much, and I want to do it for the rest of my life. Plus, I hate who I become when drinking, and I don't want that person in my life.
Wonderful intro, Ken, and great stuff from everyone else.
What keeps me sober, and coming here, is that I see people with more time than I have continuing to gain insight, peace, and serenity. I want those things. When drinking, I have none of that. I always wanted to be a true grown-up - taking life's challenges in stride, and dealing with things in a measured way. Not hiding away and ducking responsibility, trying to avoid the tough stuff. I feel that in sobriety, I can step up and take care of myself, my family, my "stuff." I like that, very much, and I want to do it for the rest of my life. Plus, I hate who I become when drinking, and I don't want that person in my life.
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