Still here... still sober :)
 

Hi
Just thought I'd check back in with folks!
I've still been here lurking... still doing the recovery program at a local outreach place here, so that keeps me pretty busy every day.
So far... I'm 29 days sober. I don't think I've had 29 days of not drinking for a very, very long time so I'm pretty pleased with myself. I know it's not a lot and it's a long road ahead, but I'm feeling positive and twice today people told me I'm looking well. I take that to be a positive thing. Had a few knocks today regarding my ex, and little digs that would normally send me running for the bottle but I handled it. Nothing tastes good enough to throw away how far I've come in a short space of time. I have a genuine fear of going back to that dark, dark place and that will stay with me for a long time to come. Although I forgive myself the terrible things I've said and done - I'll never forget them. If that is what it takes to keep me strong and sober, so be it. Can't change the past, but I can certainly learn from it and never walk down that well worn path.
I hope everyone is OK, and is happy and finding their way :)
Take care,
H :)

You're so right, H. Regret and guilt almost caused me to cave many times. As you said, we won't forget - but we have to be kind & patient with ourselves. Bad things happened because drinking changed us into a distorted version of ourselves. Never again.

Congrats on your 29 days - that's great.