Wasjamieslove

My heart is broken. I've been in a relationship for a year with a man I knew had a drinking problem. I just didn't realize how much of a problem it was. He has lied to me, cheated on me, and I've since left the relationship. He has not gone away and while he has a new girlfriend still emailed me asking to see me. I said no. I am so angry at the pain he has brought to me. I love him. Maybe I just love the man I thought he was. The one who didn't drink then pass out. The man who asked me to marry him. The man who made me feel more loved than anyone ever has. He says that his new girlfriend is "too special to lose or cheat on" and I believe this was meant to hurt me. I've begged and pleaded for him to stop drinking and go to AA and he says I am just trying to "change him". I've walked away and yet he won't go away. And I miss him. But he still refuses to go to AA or get help.

REsoberALITY

Hello and Welcome. It's always hard to see how drinking can so negatively affect the people around us, especially the ones we love. Just know that none of this is your fault. Try not to be so hard on yourself. Most of us won't take help if you take us by the hand and lead us there or set it in our lap. Best wishes.

Berrybean

Maybe you could go along to AlAnon and let the good folk there help you recover from this experience. There is nothing you can do to change him, but you can work on your own thinking around this. If not, then certainly block him number and delete his emails without reading them. How he thinks and feels about his new girlfriend is none of your business, and you don't need him telling you that stuff. And also, how he thinks and feels about you is also non of your business. You are no longer in a relationship with him, and you don't owe him any attention or listening time. You did a wise thing cutting ties with this man. Please don't keep grabbing back at the cord you just cut.

Jsbodhi

I know it doesn't feel like it right now- but you are so lucky he left.
What a douchebag- seriously; I mean who says and does that?
Xoxo

getright15

I've said my share of things to the wife as well as done some pretty bad things. We as alcoholics don't realize how we hurt the ones we love, and how it affects them after.

Stay strong. Someone else will come along your way and appreciate you.

Dee74

I'm sorry for your pain and what brings you here Wasjamieslove - but you'll find a lot of support and understanding here.....both in this forum and our Family and Friends forums too

D