It's Never Too Late Weekender July 22 Part 1
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
It's Never Too Late Weekender July 22 Part 1
In my youth I went through some terrible things. Things kids have no fault in. That made me see in my 20's that damn... My childhood was not normal. I was a decade behind my peers in understanding what life was all about. Love, sex, growing up.
Then in my 30's I finally started to relax enough to live. Just a little. I never drank or drugged before then. Could not spare the control. Needed that for my iron clad grip on life. But it was then I discovered the ability to let loose. Get drunk and sky high. I was 25 when I was 35.
My 40's had little hope as I entered them a full on crack head and drunk. Can't even compare the loss of my 40's on my being. A time when everything traded in tandem with shady folks in corners of bars and allies. I was not one of them. One of those... But I was. I truly was.
Fast forward to me pecking this out to you. A full decade later. A deep sense of life renewed sits in the pit of my belly. Every time that voice tells me it's too late... You're finished. Your time has past and you spent it high and drunk. Where sex was meaningless and love was trampled on.
You and I both know that voice. It's the voice that did this to us.
I admit. It catches me off guard sometimes. Like in mourning for someone lost, you wake and forget they are gone. You feel good until you are reminded that you aren't supposed to feel good. They are gone.
True. But I am not gone. I am right here. With a life in progress. A sober life as best as I can manage. It's never too late... I squash that voice. I give it no sound. I refuse to mourn for the younger version of Ken. I am NOT dead yet.
It's never too late. This weekend squash that voice. If it is telling you to drink or telling you you are done, pay it no mind. Post here and live a little and see others living.
Welcome to your sober weekend!
Ken
Then in my 30's I finally started to relax enough to live. Just a little. I never drank or drugged before then. Could not spare the control. Needed that for my iron clad grip on life. But it was then I discovered the ability to let loose. Get drunk and sky high. I was 25 when I was 35.
My 40's had little hope as I entered them a full on crack head and drunk. Can't even compare the loss of my 40's on my being. A time when everything traded in tandem with shady folks in corners of bars and allies. I was not one of them. One of those... But I was. I truly was.
Fast forward to me pecking this out to you. A full decade later. A deep sense of life renewed sits in the pit of my belly. Every time that voice tells me it's too late... You're finished. Your time has past and you spent it high and drunk. Where sex was meaningless and love was trampled on.
You and I both know that voice. It's the voice that did this to us.
I admit. It catches me off guard sometimes. Like in mourning for someone lost, you wake and forget they are gone. You feel good until you are reminded that you aren't supposed to feel good. They are gone.
True. But I am not gone. I am right here. With a life in progress. A sober life as best as I can manage. It's never too late... I squash that voice. I give it no sound. I refuse to mourn for the younger version of Ken. I am NOT dead yet.
It's never too late. This weekend squash that voice. If it is telling you to drink or telling you you are done, pay it no mind. Post here and live a little and see others living.
Welcome to your sober weekend!
Ken
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,776
Ken, Your note struck a cord. I drank heavily mid 20s right up till 40s. Since I've tried to stop over the last year and a half, my childhood self has emerged again to squash out the angry resentful jealous competitive entitled snob I had become.
Drink ignited every fear I had. Every single one and turned me into the very person I feared.
I feared people would look down on me so I looked down on everyone else, etc etc.
I'm such a happier peaceful soul who has a gentle and kind side. Never really knew it. Stop fighting the demons and the demons disappear.
I honestly believe I'm on the edge of something amazing here with all of you. You are having such a positive impact on my life and my family's life.
Love to the weekenders.
Welcome to the new souls.
Drink ignited every fear I had. Every single one and turned me into the very person I feared.
I feared people would look down on me so I looked down on everyone else, etc etc.
I'm such a happier peaceful soul who has a gentle and kind side. Never really knew it. Stop fighting the demons and the demons disappear.
I honestly believe I'm on the edge of something amazing here with all of you. You are having such a positive impact on my life and my family's life.
Love to the weekenders.
Welcome to the new souls.
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
MNS1 good to see you. How are you doing? Always room on the bus.
Trees, you have no idea how much you add to this something we are all on the edge of. Thanks for adding so much to our family.
Coffee time.
Edit: SW snuck in there. Morning Wolfe!
Trees, you have no idea how much you add to this something we are all on the edge of. Thanks for adding so much to our family.
Coffee time.
Edit: SW snuck in there. Morning Wolfe!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,837
How did I miss shotgun!!! The aussies and UK people are sinister!!
Anyway romantics- I sang this little tune for roanoke- maybe one day I'll be brave and share my own video- not today though....
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SLJDDV-6G58
Your mess is mine
Anyway romantics- I sang this little tune for roanoke- maybe one day I'll be brave and share my own video- not today though....
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SLJDDV-6G58
Your mess is mine
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Domhan
Posts: 1,974
I'm on. Beautiful intro K - really meaningful, thank you.
I needed to read something uplifting. I was at a funeral this morning. Someone from my old circle of drinking buddies, a circle I feel excluded from now. The exclusion began when my behaviour when drinking got really bad. I excluded myself - for the good of others and for me.
So this message is pertinent to me. It's never to late to repair damaged relationships, either with others or yourself.
I think our wise young sage Mesaman once said (or quoted?): It's never too late to have the childhood you never had.
B
I needed to read something uplifting. I was at a funeral this morning. Someone from my old circle of drinking buddies, a circle I feel excluded from now. The exclusion began when my behaviour when drinking got really bad. I excluded myself - for the good of others and for me.
So this message is pertinent to me. It's never to late to repair damaged relationships, either with others or yourself.
I think our wise young sage Mesaman once said (or quoted?): It's never too late to have the childhood you never had.
B
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
I'm in. Wonderful intro, Ken.
Ok I'm going back to sleep for a little bit. Too early for me to be up but the weather radio app on my phone jolted me awake with a severe thunderstorm watch, so I had to come here and jump on the bus.
Ok I'm going back to sleep for a little bit. Too early for me to be up but the weather radio app on my phone jolted me awake with a severe thunderstorm watch, so I had to come here and jump on the bus.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
good morning/afternoon/evening (Trees) and greetings to others in between...
Very sobering words Ken. Unfortunately for me, I can relate to a lot of what you wrote. Fortunately for me, I am sober now and realize that I can live life anew. We all can.
MSN - have you looked into rational recovery and the Big Plan? Perhaps the concept of it, and the practice itself, will inspire you and give you the upper hand on conquering the demon. It's a no nonsense approach to getting sober.
I can assure you, if you really are ready to put the past behind you, this approach and practice will empower you to succeed.
Very sobering words Ken. Unfortunately for me, I can relate to a lot of what you wrote. Fortunately for me, I am sober now and realize that I can live life anew. We all can.
MSN - have you looked into rational recovery and the Big Plan? Perhaps the concept of it, and the practice itself, will inspire you and give you the upper hand on conquering the demon. It's a no nonsense approach to getting sober.
I can assure you, if you really are ready to put the past behind you, this approach and practice will empower you to succeed.
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