FLA

Since late last Thursday night I have been in a hazy fog. I feel disconnected from everyone and everything I feel like I am not real and that I'm going to implode any second. I'm not having a anxiety attack or panic attack but that's the feeling 24/7 and then on top of that there is under lying anxiety every ten minutes. I feel delusional, and keep thinking strange thoughts and asking my self strange questions. I have never had this last this long! I can't get out of the hazy cloudy anxiety filled fog in my head. I just want peace guys! I haven't felt happy or "normal" in so long!!!!! I'm so sick of this ****!!!!! These feelings are making me think this is going to be how it is for ever. A dulled out anxiety filled mind. I just don't know what to do anymore! I'm getting desperate!!

SweatyHands

Two things: First, if you are feeling unsafe, or like these feelings are going to lead you to making dangerous decisions, go to the emergency room immediately. Second, I had these feelings as well in early sobriety, but not to the extent that you are experiencing them. The timeline for returning to "normal," is different for everyone. Are you sleeping? Of not, this might be a contributing factor. But by all means, pay attention to what you are feeling, and seek help if you need it.

ScottFromWI

You just started an anti anxiety med yesterday, it's most likely going to take quite a bit longer than 24 hours to start seeing results. SSRIs affect all people differently and there are potential side effects so make sure you let your doc know what's going on.

Dee74

Hi FLA

if you look up alcohol withdrawal kindling you'll see that the withdrawal effects can get worse over time...

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...lly-again.html

fuzzy headedness, anxiety, sense of dread, confusion...they can all be withdrawal symptoms and they can last for days.. to weeks, and unfortunately sometimes months.

It will NOT be forever tho, I promise

None of us are doctors tho - there's no way for us to diagnose whether this is withdrawal stuff or something else.

If you're finding it debilitating, please do see a Dr - and be honest about your past drinking cpd the more info you can give the more they can help

D

ps Scott is right that any new med will take a little time to bed in.

FLA

I just don't feel like my self. And I was never "dependent" on alcohol, I went out a few nights a week and drank often but a lot of times skipped a week or two of no drinking with no issues. I do not think this is alcohol withdrawal. I have seen the doctor three times this week. I just don't even know what I'm doing anymore it's extremely frustrating to live like this and I know my girl friend has to be getting tired of me and me "feelings" and how I'm acting so dull and distant lately. I'm very open with my doctor and girlfriend etc I don't hide anything, I just want to be my self again.

EndGameNYC

You need to check in with the doctor who prescribes your medication.

Anxiety is a state of being, a condition, not a feeling. Nervousness, which is a feeling, typically accompanies anxiety, but is not the only symptom. A sense of things around you, our you yourself, not feeling quite real can be symptomatic of either chronic or severe anxiety, and often comes with panic disorder. As Scott commented, what you're experiencing could also be related to your new meds, or another medical or psychiatric condition. Only your doctor can know what's going on.

FLA

Also, I read the link you sent me. I have never had a issue with only drinking one or two drinks stopping and going home. That's not a problem for me. I still have a Bottle of vodka and some IPAs in the fridge as well right now that I'm not even thinking about till now that I mentioned it, they have been there a couple weeks. It's this HEAD funk I'm in that's messing me up and that fact that I don't know what is causing it is making me crazy. Sure it could be booze but it could also be anxiety, depression, bipolar.. And I'm on that new SSRI. Honestly I'm just worried as ****. Rather be a happy drunk than be miserably sober. But I can't even drink anymore either so that's not even a option anymore. I want to feel good so bad!

FLA

You're right. I see him again tomorrow. I can't do anything else but post on here to get relief. I'm at the house alone and stuck in my thoughts, thanks for the replies

D122y

It has to be the new meds.

Did you feel like this before you took them?

FLA

Yes I felt like this before the meds. First day I took them I felt slightly better now I'm way back down where I was. I just don't feel like my self and super disconnected from everything. Just went to the local lake to take a walk and get some air and there is like 200 people here playing Pokemon..... Wtf. Walk helped a little bit still feel completely ****** and out of whack tho.

FLA

But the whole reason I'm on the meds is because of the way I'm feeling I haven't noticed any side effects other than delayed sex stuff. But that could also be just because I'm disconnected and have all this anxiety. It's Zoloft as well, a pretty easy going SSRI. My dads on it and has helped him a lot the past 20 years he's been taking it for anxiety. I was ok two weeks ago, aside from the drinking, mentally I wasn't this bad.

oldsoul112249

Your Dr. should have the Millenium GT test available to you. They take a swab of saliva and send the kit to a lab. You will get back a loooong list of drugs.....which ones you are compatible with and which you aren't. I couldn't tolerate Celexa so my Dr. took me off of it. Later the test showed it's not for my system.

Dee74

If you don't feel you're a candidate for kindling, thats ok - no skin off my nose, just trying to help

I didn't know you were on new meds in my initial post.

I always follow a latest change flowchart if there's something new developing or something wrong. It's just common sense

See your Dr by all means, but I'd hope it's just the new meds bedding in

D

EndGameNYC

It might even have something to do with that "bottle of vodka and some IPAs in the fridge."

Just sayin'.

fripfrop

Depersonalisation, the sensation that you don't feel real.
Or Derealisation, the sensation that the world aroung you doesn't feel real, are dissociative disorders.
They can be brought on by extreme stress and anxiety.
I've had it before when I was younger. Along with all the other strange thoughts you describe.
It's a horrible feeling, and frightning if you don't know whats happening.
Luckily, once the stress and depression are under control, it goes away.

If you Google dissociative disorders, you should be able to find a good explaination about it.

It won't last forever, and will probably recede once the anti-depressants kick in.

Don't worry, all the strange thoughts and feelings you are having, will go away once the anxiety and depression are brought under control

FLA

I have never heard of that, I am most definitely bringing that up with him tomorrow and wrote it down, thank you!

FLA

Good to hear from someone this has happened to before. It is very annoying and difficult to deal with especially talking with my girl friend and trying to act "normal" even tho she is very aware what I'm going through. Every so often I can feel my "normal" self pop through for one or two seconds and the fog clears but only momentarily. I've lost a lot of money, time, and energy over this since it started last Friday. I really hope this ends soon. Thanks so much for your reply.

fripfrop

Don't worry, it will end.
It is hard, walking around with this surreal feel to everything and to yourself and trying to pretend everything is normal.
And it's a hard sensation to explain to anyone who hasn't experienced it.
The time I had it, I had to have a peice of paper with my name and address written on it, incase I forgot who I was, or where I lived.
It felt to me like I was disappearing from the real world, or that it would disappear from me.
Strangest, most disturbing thing, not nice to have at all!
The good news is, you are not going mad, and it will end.
Take care

Berrybean

I wasn't an every day drinker either, but I remember that washing machine head and anxiety well in the early weeks. Especially at around a month. That was when I realised that alcohol had been an even bigger part of my old life than I'd understood, and that I was going to need to do more towards my recovery, so I eventually went to AA. The fuzzy headed cleared, along with some initial anxiety with just going to meetings, but then, without my usual crutch and regular relief from life, and my thinking, and i alsk began remembering things and dwelling get on them, and so the anxiety grew and grew. My head was like an odds and ends draw that had junk all crammed in an knotted together. While I was still drinking I'd been able to keep quickly cramming more crap in there and slamming the drawer shut, refusing to peek inside. But now it was like an open Pandora box, and much as I wanted to keep up the denial and 'just get back to normal', actually, going back to being That me was no longer an option. Ťhen I got a sponsor and started working the steps. That was like taking all the crap out, looking at it, and taking proper responsibility for where it should go, or chucking it out (or, if you like, handing it over). Not all of that crap was caused by my drinking, or being drunk at the time. But it was caused by my faulty alcoholic thinking, my priorities, and the character defects that were magnified by my alcoholic lifestyle. I needed to get things straighter so I could start finding the Me that isn't a crap magnet. The Me that can be happy, joyous and free from the ties of active alcoholism.

I am full of gratitude for the gifts that sobriety have given me, and the new Me that I am able to be. For a lot of months I was worried that my old me was disappearing and I too would disappear altogether. But it wasn't a process of losing the old self. It was a process of removing all the crap, and finding the good underneath. I heard someone describe it as being like a shiny magnet that is covered in crap after being dragged across the junkyard of life. Recovery is a process of not picking up any more crap, and slowly removing all the stuff that weighs us down. As well as the crap, you may well find some treasure in there.

Good luck on your journey of recovery. I wish you all the best.