newbie
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: la, Ca
Posts: 43
newbie
Most of the time I feel like my drug use hasn't crossed the line into addiction. Looking back 2 months, sober, the thought process looks scary. I was doing a line in my family's bathroom, genuinely believing the people around me were manipulating and out to get me for repeatedly talking about drug abuse and addiction.
The primary reason for sharing and keeping in check now is...I want to have a happy life no matter what I have to believe and share, I really want a healthy family, and life is too short to waste a day paranoid, isolating, and miserable on the inside.
Anyway I'm brooke.
The primary reason for sharing and keeping in check now is...I want to have a happy life no matter what I have to believe and share, I really want a healthy family, and life is too short to waste a day paranoid, isolating, and miserable on the inside.
Anyway I'm brooke.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Georgia
Posts: 471
Thanks Brooke! I'm right with you on this.
It's awful right now, seeing how much I've messed up, how bad it had really gotten.
But it's helping me to stay motivated to stay sober. When I was thinking, "it's not all that bad" then it was easy to relapse. I hope that now that I see how awful it's really gotten, as painful as it is to look at it and as scary as it is to be living in the mess I've made of my life, that it will keep me inspired to keep in recovery.
Welcome to SR!
It's awful right now, seeing how much I've messed up, how bad it had really gotten.
But it's helping me to stay motivated to stay sober. When I was thinking, "it's not all that bad" then it was easy to relapse. I hope that now that I see how awful it's really gotten, as painful as it is to look at it and as scary as it is to be living in the mess I've made of my life, that it will keep me inspired to keep in recovery.
Welcome to SR!
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome to SR Brooke! You'll find lots of support and people who understand here. Good job on recognizing your drug issues, that's the first step ( an a very important one ) to getting better. Have you ever attempted to quit before?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: la, Ca
Posts: 43
Thanks everyone. I've stopped and started a lot... I don't know. I'm almost 30 and at this point it seems like a waste.
I want to get married some day, move, buy a house. That all seems impossible if I don't believe to never again.
I want to get married some day, move, buy a house. That all seems impossible if I don't believe to never again.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: la, Ca
Posts: 43
Originally Posted by KarenOskie 
Thanks Brooke! I'm right with you on this.
It's awful right now, seeing how much I've messed up, how bad it had really gotten.
But it's helping me to stay motivated to stay sober. When I was thinking, "it's not all that bad" then it was easy to relapse. I hope that now that I see how awful it's really gotten, as painful as it is to look at it and as scary as it is to be living in the mess I've made of my life, that it will keep me inspired to keep in recovery.
Welcome to SR!
It's awful right now, seeing how much I've messed up, how bad it had really gotten.
But it's helping me to stay motivated to stay sober. When I was thinking, "it's not all that bad" then it was easy to relapse. I hope that now that I see how awful it's really gotten, as painful as it is to look at it and as scary as it is to be living in the mess I've made of my life, that it will keep me inspired to keep in recovery.
Welcome to SR!
I'm moody in general. I become a complete paranoid ********.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Reno, Nv
Posts: 411
Originally Posted by geldofc
Thanks everyone. I've stopped and started a lot... I don't know. I'm almost 30 and at this point it seems like a waste.
I want to get married some day, move, buy a house. That all seems impossible if I don't believe to never again.
I want to get married some day, move, buy a house. That all seems impossible if I don't believe to never again.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: la, Ca
Posts: 43
Originally Posted by ZenLifter
Hi Brooke. As they say, "nothing changes if nothing changes." Yes you have to quit first before you can get married, buy a house, etc. but it is not a waste, and at 30, your life is far from over. Have you thought about going to NA?
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