Be3rad

A lot has happened to me in the last 9 months of my sobriety.
I have my family and friends back
I moved around the country and visited a good amount of places
Fixed up my car
Met a lot of good people
Helped a few friends when they needed me
and ETC*

But for some reason I'm still being selfish thinking I should be further along. So why cant I be grateful where I am when I should just be a memory?

I posted this in substance abuse, but I really need some advice, I needed it yesterday

Dee74

I think change is best seen as a process rather than an event, be3rad.

I wasn't a bad guy - but I'd become pretty self centered over 2 or 3 decades of addiction.

It was so ingrained it actually took me a few months to even acknowledge that, let alone figure out what I might do about it....

I always tell people - I know most of us want things *now*....but there's no short cuts with this recovery journey - cos the journey itself really is the learning experience and the promoter of growth, not the destination

Try and relax - what if you're right where you need to be right now ?

D

Be3rad

I am most likely 100% where I need to be and my family and people in my support network tell me I'm doing just fine. I guess I'm to hard on myself its probably because I never made anything of myself in my 7 year career of drinking and drugging I just want it all now

MythOfSisyphus

At first I was grateful to be alive and free of booze. And while I still am glad to be sober I do get a creeping sense of loss...loss of all the years I won't get back. It goes me no good, I know that intellectually, but on some emotional level I'm bummed about all the years I wasted being drunk (like 25 years).

LadyBlue0527

Hi Be3rad

I think we're so used to the mindframe of instant gratification when we were users that we want the same in life once we're in recovery.

Drugs and drinking were a quick fix for whatever reason we could find to create the need.

Once we are clean and sober our minds want everything to be ok all at once. Unfortunately, life doesn't work that way, it's all in due time by living life on a daily basis without drinking or drugging.

Define "further along". Are there things that you can do to expedite getting to where you want to be?

Gottalife

For me the process was coming to realise there had been an event, the removal of the alcoholic obsession.