MB8

Has anyone been at this point. I can't believe I have gotten to this point. I drink every night and drink at least 10 beers. 2 kids, wife, and good job, this doesn't really work. Had more " Day 1s " then I care to count. I can't do this anymore. I can't imagine not drinking, yet I don't enjoy it anymore. ****. Not sure what to do. I'm going to dinner with my family as we speak and drinking a fosters oil can in the car. My wife is close to being done. I can tell. Said sorry to many times. ****

Coldfusion

Maybe have your wife drop you at an AA meeting while the rest of the family goes to dinner? The folks at the meeting would certainly have some good advice on local recovery resources (It sounds like you might need detox or rehab).

MB8

Problem is I already drinks on board. After that, the only thing I'm thinking is where is my next drink

Noolan

I know the feeling of not imagining a life without booze. It caused me not to get sober and relapse numerous times before I hit rock bottom. Where I lost enough that I finally fully accepted, unequivocally that I couldn't live the life I wanted and also drink. It was one or the other. You can get sober.

strategery

I think the choice is pretty obvious.
You don't like drinking any more.
You wife is close to being done with you if you continue to drink, and you may lose your kids.

I know it's scary to think about not drinking, but sobriety really does get better and it gets easier. However, it's going to take time, patience and hard work. Why not start looking at things you can do to support your sobriety?

MB8

I have never gotten to rock bottom. Job never affected. Although I feel that wife is close to going. I don't want to " ride the elevator to the bottom ". Alcohol is the devil

Coldfusion

When I was at the point of needing the next drink, my wife helped get me off to a week in detox--locked up away from alcohol.

MB8

Unfortunately I have a job that is not at all conducive to rehab/recovery. I know. Are they are conducive to drunks. Definately not.

tomsteve

the thought of life without alcohol was rather scarey for me.
but I had a thought that got me to AA and into action:
life continuing with alcohol
there was already a lot of gloom,dispair, and agony and if I kept drinking I was going to die- whether by alcohol or suicide.
the gift of desperation was the greatest gift I was ever given.

theres been a LOT of people at AA meetings drunk. so, because you already started drinking isn't a good enough excuse to not go.

least

I hope you can stop drinking before it's too late.

MB8

I feel like I am wasting not only my time but yours as well. The reason being, tomoro when I wake, although I will feel like garbage, the only thing I'll be thinking is what I will be drinking when I get home from work.

Noolan

I never lost a job either. I was a high functioning drug addict alcoholic. My point is you don't have to hit a nefarious bottom. My realization came after years of therapy, moderation, and failed attempts to get sober. It became more work to drink than not drink and the results of anything but sober life resulted in me finding myself in the same hopeless places. There is hope and a life outside of alcohol if you want it. My advice is to give it another shot.

LadyBlue0527

But that's actually why you should be here and you're not wasting your time.

Part of starting is by having a plan so that you don't drink. Whether it be to come here and post or whatever it is that you need to do. Please, don't walk away from here. You've taken a big step just by coming here. You'll find hope in these posts. You'll realize that you're not alone and all of us felt just like you do right now. It's a hard fight but it can be done.

I credit SR for keeping me sober so many times when I thought I wasn't going to make it. It still does.

Stay.

tomsteve

youre not wasting anyones time.
many of us have been right where you are. no matter how sick and hungover I would be in th emorning, one of my first thoughts was," I sure hope I feel good enough to drink by quitting time."
you might want to look into rehab

Dee74

I think if you want to stop you have to start making defferent decisions. It might be as simple as not drinking tomorrow but dgoing to see your Dr instead, or an AA meeting...

Sobriety is not going to fall on you by accident MB8 - you sound like you're in pretty deep...

you'll need to work to get out of the hole you're in.

D

Venecia

You're not wasting anyone's time here. That's what our community is for.

Are you wasting your own time? I've noticed that in the last eight months or so, you've posted every two to three months when your personal situation is dire. What happens during the periods in between when we don't see you?

There are steps you can take.

1. Log on here every day.

2. Start an accountability thread.

3. Join the SR Class of July 2016 and post several times a day.

4. Reconsider your refusal to enter treatment. This site provides links to many rehab centers. Again, whose time are you wasting? My concern for you is that you are letting time slip away. Rock bottom keeps being chased downhill.

5. Go to an AA meeting everyday.

You can do this.

least

You can stay sober, you just haven't done it yet. Choose a sober life, you won't regret it.

strategery

It's not going to get better if you continue on the same path.

While your job hasn't been affected, it just hasn't been affected yet.

MB8

Thanks to all. Especially Venecia. It's awful. We just had neighbors over, unexpected, and they don't drink. I was too drunk so just went in the bedroom to " hide" so they didn't know the real me. Meantime my " Normy " wife was out there having a great conversation. The crazy thing about this is there is about a 15 minute initial " buzz " phase that is unreal. The rest of it is garbage. ****!!!!!

hellrzr

In AA you are at at what they call the jumping off point. You can't imagine life with alcohol but you also cannot imagine life without alcohol. They have a solution for this but you have to take some action to find it. Get to an AA meeting and ask someone to sponsor you. If you follow their direction your life can turn around faster than you ever thought possible! It all starts with action though to get to a meeting right away!!