shadower4

i'm 23, male and i gained an alcohol problem in college when my ex broke up with me. Long story short i regret so many things i did underr the influence... i did horrible unspeakable things.... i can't take it back and it haunts me. i'm finishing college within a month, taking my last class this summer. I finally have a cute girl interested in me and i'm screwing it up. I wake up each day feeling depressed and filled with anxiety, i have nothing to do but stuff i hate like work, school... i can't sleep at nights even before alcohol. i went through 3 horrible withdraw periods, the 1st was the worst one as the alchohol mixed with a new anti anxiety/ depressant medication i was using, i thought i was going to die. the next time i decided to stop was bad too, i was itching and twitching all over, i got not even a minute of sleep in 3 days. This last time which was 3 weeks ago was the worst as far as lasting damage goes, i think my immune system shut down, i got random stretch marks that look bad in a lot of places ( i didn't grow and i'm not fat by anymeans), i couldn't completely pee everytime i went, i looked like i aged 30 years, my liver hurt bad, my forehead got really dry with scaly like skin, sorry i'm ranting now, i could go on with the side effects, i feel so sad when sober, i know i can stop, i just got through the side effects again by beig sober for a week, i'm drinking again now, i just don't know how to live sober, it's so miserable, idk what's wrong with me

Anna

There is nothing wrong with you, but you need some patience and willingness to work at it. Stopping drinking is the beginning. But, that's when the hard work begins because you must deal with the issues that led you to alcoholism. That is where you will find peace and joy in your life.

Please talk to a dr about your withdrawal symptoms if you are concerned. And, give yourself some sober time before you decide you are unhappy being sober.

Dee74

Hi shadower

I found a lot of support here. Reading and posting daily really helped me through those rough first few weeks.

Many of us drank for years - things will get better but it may take a little time. You have to have faith that a little short term low level suffering is worth it

D

least

At 3 months sober I wasn't feeling so great. It was suggested that I start practicing gratitude every day. It was hard at first as I was very depressed and didn't think I had much to be grateful for. But I kept up until it became a habit. And it changed my attitude to a positive one.

Don't give up on sobriety. Do what's needed to make yourself happy and productive. Give yourself time. You don't have to be miserable.

Hevyn

Hi Shadower - I'm so glad you joined us.

I think talking things over here will help. You're never alone - most of us have had the same or similar feelings. It won't feel like that forever - you just need some sober time & chance to heal.

Soberwolf

Hi Shadower

keeppushing

God, I wish I had realised that I had a problem when I was 23. You caught it early. There will be ups and downs, many downs at first, but slowly more ups. I haven't reached my goal yet, but I already feel much better.

All the best,

KP