Mattq2

I had a talk today with my wife of thirty years. I have made many attempts to quit drinking over the years. Once made it six years but I always end back where I started. This is my last try on my own. If I fail I will be heading for rehab. I would appreciate any insight into daily out patient rehab versus inpatient treatments. I don't give myself much of a chance on my own but I'm going to try.....again

Pseudocream

No experience just to say DO IT!! You have nothing to lose and everything to gain!

Soberwolf

I would say if your thinking about rehab then make it so it will really help & I've seen with my own family how it saved thier lives

ZenLifter

Hi Matt, someone else with more experience will have to chime in on your main question. But I can say that there is little in life that any of us do "on our own," and quitting an addiction is no exception. I needed help from others like me who understood, on here and in person

sugarbear1

Both give you good information. For me, I had to also do something else, and that was the 12 steps. There are several methods to help you stay stopped.

The most important aspect is that you have to want to stay stopped more than you want to drink!

HeadingtoChange

I've been to rehab. IMO 30 days is not long enough so go for longer option if you can. Residential followed by outpatient would be something I would recommend rather than just outpatient only. Choose rehab wisely as most will be 12 step based therefore you will need to go to AA afterwards, I believe there are other programs at some rehabs. Not that there is anything wrong with 12 step rehabs but don't put yourself in the position of using that as an excuse to yourself not to go. Good luck.

tate9685

If you can afford to go to a 30 day rehab program it may be a good idea to start there and if not then maybe outpatient with daily AA meetings for 90 days. Stay in recovery and not around the edges. That's what works for me. When I stop going and socializing with other alcoholics then I forget how bad it gets and months may go by without a drink but then I do pick up again

Mattq2

I own my own business. I don't see a way that I can be gone that long. I know I have to do this and trying to get a good plan together. I'm researching places now so if I slip up even once I want to be there (rehab) the next day. I have explained to my family that holding me accountable to following through with this plan is vital. I really want to be strong and free!

Mattq2

Thank you Tate. I'll locate AA meetings in my area

Dee74

Welcome to SR Matt

D

notgonnastoptry

I'll take what I can get. When I was calling around for rehab, they said the minimum was 30 days, but they recommend 90.

I just can't, for myriad reasons. I know people will argue and say I should place my sobriety over all else. The circumstances after a potential 90 days would be destructive to my entire life and leave me in a tailspin. I cannot just turn life off for 90 days.

So, I talked to a lot of unhelpful rehabs (no offense) that would not help, they were not interested in me coming for 14 days and then continuing with outpatient, etc. Frankly, some were downright rude, some even had the audacity to talk about the "Lord". I do not believe in the Lord and I'd appreciate it if people didn't assume I was a WASP or something.

What if I were Hindu? It's not only white-chrisitans who are susceptible to this disease.

Anyway, I finally found something. They are letting me come five days a week (about 6 hours a day) and then I'll go home. It's IOP. After that, I have to make another plan.

Good luck. I understand not being able to shut life off. I know recovery is important, but there isn 't a one-size-fits-all.

least

Glad to see you giving it another go. You will stay sober if you want to stay sober more than you want to drink.

Mattq2

Thank you notgonna. It's almost eight o'clock and I'm drinking tea so I desperately hope I can do it on my own this time. I've read here a lot and feel I'm better prepared this time. I'll keep searching for diffrent options.

thomas11

Hey Matt, I could written your OP. I had the talk with the wife, and vowed I'd go to rehab if I couldn't quit. By the grace of god, this forum, and NOT wanting to go to rehab I've made it so far. I wish you well. You can do it.

Mattq2

She's an awesome women. Don't know why she puts up with me. I think my verbal commitment to her will give me extra motivation. It felt good to talk openly about it

JoeCree

Hey matt.. what and how did you do your 6 years sober, and if i may ask, why did you start again?

Mattq2

Well it actually was more like seven years. Some of this is hard to say because I'm really not an emotional type of person. My own father was an alcoholic . Choose drinking over his children when I was very young. I have very little memory of him. The ones I do have are not good. When I began to have my own children I promised myself I wouldn't do that to my kids. I quit and put all my time into coaching sports, field trips and science projects. Things that normal dads do. Then as they became teenagers they started having there own lives and needed me less. Then one day on vacation I said you know what I'm going to have a beer. You know how that turned out. I've been drinking off and on for a long time ever since. I can tell you this. There is no middle ground for me. I either drink or I don't.

Mattq2

Funny thing is joecree. Your probably the first person I have ever told that story too

Delilah1

Hi Matt,

Welcome to SR!

Hevyn

Hi Matt - long time drinker here, too. 30 yrs. I now have over 8 sober. Never thought I'd ever do it. Being here, talking things over with people who cared & understood, made all the difference. We're so glad you found us. You can be strong and free....