chicory

Dee, this would have pizzed me off no end! I work in grocery/retail, and don't see that often. It might have been as was mentioned, a thief using you as a distraction, or a pizz poor security person, as they are plainclothed. Lawsuits have been filed, for being accused , searched, and detained, unfairly.

Glad you are able to shake it off, but I am not so good at letting things go- they would so hate that they stopped me unjustly..lol

fini

something happens just from the accusation...something in the context around us.
and it temporarily outrages me when i need to prove i did nothing.
once an accusation is out there, there is a yuck! feeling.

on the other hand, i was at a big fair a few weeks ago as a volunteer, and thought i saw a guy pocket something. didn't know what to do, but was pretty sure. so i went to the vendor and asked them to look over their stuff and see if it looked like they were missing something.
nothing was missing.
yet, i was 99% sure.
i saw the guy's hand pick up an item from the table and then put his hand in his pantpocket, all apparently in one swift movement.
guess on the way to the pocket he dropped the item back on the table.

there is likely no malicious intent behind the accusation.

glad you're alright, Dee.

Irnldy001

Timely post Dee!

I too am attempting to deal with what I think is horrible unfairness.

I work in a high school. Us staff have to share the back parking lot with students, and trust me when I say that they drive like NUTJOBS

On Thursday, last day of school, I went into my drivers seat as normal and drove home. Thursday evening my husband came into the house and asked me what the heck I did to my back bumper. HUH?

So I went out to inspect it with him and could only come to the conclusion that one of the drivers in the lot (only place I'd been that day) must have hit and left no note.

I called insurance and they asked if I could please take it to the police collision reporting centre. I just returned now. The very unfriendly fellow looked at it and began interrogating me. He told me there was no way another car hit me bacause of the type of scratches etc.... and perhaps someone else drove the vehicle? Um no. I was extremely offended and reminded them that in fact I'd no idea what actually happenned because I'd not been in the car at the time - I was giving them my very best guess. In the end they declined to write the report.

I know it will be fine, and after I pay my insurance deductible the car will be fixed. I just really hate the way they treated me like a liar and a criminal. (I have no past record with any law enforcement of any sort. Not even a speeding ticket).

I'm still a bit bruised that they could just write up a report that said 'no idea what occurred but there is injury to the car while driven had parked it).

So I feel you Dee!! Awful to feel on the hot seat and accused when you've done positively nothing to deserve it.

Gonnachange

Dee, I'm sorry you had to experience that.

SoberLeigh

It hurt me to read this, Dee.

Hold your head high, very high; you are a good and honest man.

least

That's a bummer, but your conscience is clear so no worries.

Hevyn

Made me mad too, Dee. How ridiculous. I'm glad you're going to take your business elsewhere for a while. As you said, we don't drink over such things anymore - that's the good news.

desertsong

Geez, Dee, that's awful. I'm so sorry that happened to you.

But I appreciate the post. This past week, my boss accused me of something I did not do. He said that I just up and "left" work without notice to anyone, which was bizarre to me because I never do that. He knows my schedule and knows that right now I am having to bring my special needs child with me to work so my schedule is a bit weird until my caregiver starts in a couple of weeks. I have never just up and left my job with no notice to anyone, so it totally caught me off guard. And yes, I considered drinking over it because, of course, that is my "go to" when things in my life take a turn. I didn't, and I'm glad you didn't either. But it goes to show us that anything can happen at any time to make us pull the trigger.

Thank you for sharing and helping all of us add another weapon into our sober arsenal.

Dee74

Thanks everyone.

I'm really sorry for anyone else who's been at the receiving end of some injustice - but I'm glad this thread gave us a chance to vent.

I wouldn't say I'm over it - that probably won't happen til I get a response to my complaint - but I am ready to put it behind me

thanks to everyone again for your support

D

venuscat

Sorry I missed this yesterday....I am so glad you lodged a complaint Dee.

We have to stand up for ourselves....all of us....

I hope the shop owners get back to you with a huge apology. ♥

Dee74

so...I was thinking today what I'd advise someone else to do in these circumstances - and the idea of going back to the store was irritatingly prominent...

I did nothing wrong after all, and the only real damage was to my pride...so I went back...

noone asked to check my pockets, and my usual check out woman was there today...friendly, warm, no change in her demeanour....

I'd still like an apology, but I feel as if I can let it go now.
Thanks everyone for your support

D

venuscat

That's very cool Dee; I'm so glad you went back.

(Still hope the apology is forthcoming).

Soberpotamus

I admire you for walking right back in there, Dee. You're a good guy.

Pondlady

It took some courage to go back and why shouldn't you, as you'd done nothing wrong.

I've pondered this post and think, for me, being " thin skinned" led to more drinking.......I still struggle, but thankfully , drinking isn't a solution anymore !

August252015

Sigh. I can relate. I did something "dishonest" when drunk and got arrested for it. I am still paying the price in terms of it being on my record. The real, sober me is deeply ashamed and I struggle with my guilt, and can find it hard to keep it compartmentalized in my past.

Fairness has always been a big one to me and I am particularly sensitive to situations of "dishonesty" of action. I find I overcompensate sometimes as if to make up for what I did. And these days, the mere hint of an accusation of such makes me feel - all kinds of bad stuff.

Thanks for sharing, D.

Leshar

How awful, Dee. I'm really sorry this happened to you. You most assuredly deserve an apology.

Spacegoat

Feeling accused is a big thing for me too, let alone being accused.

I read somewhere that it is an ACo thing, perhaps trigger, as an aside.

Anyway I hope that you put it back! Just kidding...