theTHINman

Day 27 here and I feel like I just might be able to go on living. My wife says that she is still undecided about the future of our relationship, but at least we are being intimate again and she said that she knows I love her and that she still loves me - she just isn't IN LOVE with me right now. Today is the first day that I feel like I can even begin to grapple and possibly cope with the future, whatever that may bring. I'm just trying to be as strong and supportive as I can right now, walking the walk and not just talking the talk anymore. I was really crowding her and being super needy with regard to how she's feeling and what she's thinking and I have backed off a lot, just trying to give her the physical and mental space she needs to sort everything out. As someone else said, uncertainty - especially in the throes of deep withdrawal - is anathema to an addict.

My anxiety and debilitating brain fog have finally relented somewhat, at least to the point where I can see and feel myself about to make the stupid mistakes before I actually do. Like today I grabbed the wrong set of keys to my truck and realized the error before I actually got into the vehicle and tried to use the wrong ones. Stuff like that. Today is also the first day that I've felt hopeful and had that slight tickle of positive energy that was, at one time, so brimming over in my life. Hurrah!

entropy1964

I'm glad you're feeling better.

You are smart to give your wife space. Its hard to do, but that's how ya know its the right thing to do.

Hang in there.

leviathan

i would wager that if you devote yourself to fixing the main problem, once and for all, the rest will click into place.

my early sobriety felt like a minefield. -so many problems and doubts... By putting my all into finding a way to live without medicating, i fixed alot of the stuff that was "collateral damage".

Also, I've come to think that some women are turned-on by a guy who can make a challenging commitment and follow through. Just a theory at this point, but the evidence seems to confirm. HA!

Stay the course. Dont pick-up again. No matter what.

Opivotal

I was in total brain fog the first month of sobriety.

I'm happy to hear you're feeling a bit better.

Giving your wife space is an excellent decision.

Good for you, THINman. Keep up the great work, life really does get easier the longer you're sober.

Ruby2

Keep moving forward and focusing on sobriety. I had a lot of brain fog in the beginning. It took a bit of time for that to clear but it did.

Family relationships? Those can heal (slowly) IF we keep moving forward. Keep giving your wife the space she needs. Don't make any promises. Just take care of yourself. Actions speak louder than words.

theTHINman

Thanks for all the encouragement, guys. I'm actually viewing this time apart as a win-win situation: we both get a chance to clear our heads and lick some wounds. I'm going to miss both her and my daughter, but not having them at home will really give me a chance to get my stuff together and make some real strides. I hope that by the time I go up to visit them this time next month that I'll have grown stronger, in every meaning of the word. Here's to your theory, leviathan!

Dee74

I hope things will be better for you from here on in theTHINman

D