Redoplease

When do you let people in on your life changes? Not everyone needs to know. Some will be so judge mental. Do you just keep it in your small circle of friends and family or do you shout it from rooftops "I'm an alcoholic and I haven chosen sobriety"
Just curious on your thoughts on this. I know I'm s little hesitant to share with some because I'm aware how judgemental people are. And even some who would like to see me fail.
Your thoughts????

Mountainmanbob

I don't shout it from the rooftops that's for sure. But I see no shame in telling ones that I meet that I'm in recovery and don't drink. Reminding myself daily of what God saved me from.
MM

Nonsensical

I tell the people who need to know. If I am offered a drink in a social situation I just say, "no thank you, I don't drink". If they press I say something like "I've drank enough for one lifetime". Most people don't want to talk about it any further, but if they do I am happy to oblige. I generally suck at small talk, but I can rail on endlessly about sober living to a willing audience.

entropy1964

For me the people who need to know already do. Other than that I simply say I don't drink...nothing beyond that.

You're pretty early days right? Maybe give yourself some time, months, and ask yourself that question at a later date.

ardy

it is my mile stone and mine alone... for I am the only one that can control what goes into my body and what happens to my body.. a lot of people around me have no idea... just that I am a silly old lady clown... with lots of years in back of me.. yep

August252015

My parents and Godparents are intimately aware of the whole backstory and now recovery.

A small, very small circle of friends know about 75% and knew from the day I quit, going strong til today. I am opening up to a few more- people who are important to me that I drifted away from, or otherwise lost- and sharing as I am comfortable. Only a couple of non-program friends or "outsiders" know anything.

Someone told me a month or so in that I should protect my story and how I opened up as I might regret blabbing all over early on; this was good advice to me as I was an over-sharer when drinking so as I am getting my bearings (I hit 4mos today) it is probably a good idea to be a little circumspect.

I haven't had many moments to answer "what would you like to drink?" but I have no problem with a white lie, changing the subject, deflection whatever. I am a great BS artist so this kind of thing doesn't worry me; if it's around those who knew me as a big drinker, I can handle that too.

MIRecovery

The people that are close to me know. I find it easier that they do because there are events where I choose not to go or leave early . I don't have to explain myself because they already know what the deal is. Others I let God guide me. I don't hide it but it my business not anyone else's

aasharon90

Addiction is real. Addiction claims more
folks than we know. Those in recovery
certainly know the dangers of it, the
affects of it and have taken the road
to listen, learn, aborb and apply a helpful
recovery program to incorporate in all
areas of our lives in order to live and
not die.

There's not enough voices out their
to raise a huge concern of how deadly
addiction is.

I am just one small voice amongst
many others in recovery that have
become passionate about it and
even tho I learned the AA program
25 yrs ago consisting of steps and
principles, the anonymity part of
it cant keep me from sharing my
own ESH - experiences, strengths
and hopes of what my life was and
is like before, during and after alcohol
to others suffering with addiction.

Raising awareness for addiction is
just as important as it is for everything
else out their in the world that is
claiming so many lives day after day.

However way we wish to share our
addiction and recovery is a choice
and if we are aware of its severity
and passion for it then it can save
one more person from death or
provid life.

tomsteve

im thinkin ya might gety the same reaction as when I say," you don't have enough for me to drink."

kind of a tilted dog head look?

MLD51

Early on, the only people who knew were close friends and family. I don't shout it from the rooftops now, but I feel pretty comfortable talking about it if it comes up. I gauge each person and situation individually. If it's an acquaintance, I just say I quit drinking. If they press for more, I'll go there if it seems they are truly interested. I've had several people ask me how I did it, showing real interest, and a couple even asking asking for help starting their own journeys (they haven't done it yet, as far as I know, but they have my number). I'm not ashamed of my sobriety. I was ashamed of some of the things I did when drinking, sure. But I figure telling people I have quit, and then staying quit, will go a long way toward changing any bad attitude they may have toward me.

Anna

I have found that my recovery is a very personal journey. I do love to come here to SR and read and post about recovery. But, other than that, I seldom talk about it.

Vinificent

I do keep my recovery to myself. I wish I had the courage to speak openly about it but I am afraid of being negatively judged. I just say no thanks when offered a drink.

Redoplease

I agree with all of this. Once again this group does not let me down. Thank you for all of the feed back.

thomas11

I don't feel the need to tell anyone.

totfit

I don't shout it off the rooftops and don't say "I am an alcoholic". I am not sure I even like the term as it is so "broad". I think we do too much to label when we are just all "human beans". That said, I easily say that drinking does not agree with me. I easily say that I have never been able to drink normally and that I have a bad reaction to it. To some I even say that I might, "break out in a drunk" or that it makes me crazy. I have accepted those facts and I see them as no big deal. It does help me to be frank when it comes to letting people know about my relationship to alcohol (if it comes up). I don't bring it up unless the conversation is about alcohol...........or if I see where it might help someone else.

Nonsensical

Yeah.

I took my 28-year-old son out to dinner a few nights back. The restaurant was packed, but you can eat at the bar and there were seats open, so I suggested we use them. "Won't that make you want a beer?" he asked.

Me: If I just wanted A beer I wouldn't have a problem. I want all the beers, and where I am sitting has nothing to do with it.

Tilted head look.

Dinner was delicious, but why do these places always think everyone wants peach-mango in their iced tea?

ccam1973

Very personal question and decision. I am not ashamed of my addiction, it is a part of me... But not everyone needs to know about it either. If it can't be of benefit to me or my sobriety then there is no reason for others to know. My family knows and close friends but that's about it.

What ever helps to keep you sober, go with it. The only word of caution I would bring up is telling anyone at work. In my opinion, it could be a bad idea to profess any of your demons to those you work with; unless it's confidentially to the HR department when asking for work assisted counseling, etc.

uncorked

Unfortunately, more people know about my trip to rehab than I would like. I was leaving my teenage triplets for 7 weeks. Their stepdad was there to make sure no one burned the house down, but I had to tell some of their friends' parents, a neighbor, my attorney, a school counselor and a few friends who would notice if I didn't respond to their calls/texts for 7 weeks! But I've kept a very low profile since I returned from rehab. To my friends, it's no big deal. They never saw me drunk and crazy -- I usually did that alone -- so I don't think they understand why I went to rehab in the first place. However, I've found most people admire what I'm doing. I definitely don't shout it out to the world, though.

Berrybean

I only tell people who I'm close to who are likely to be discreet and supportive. Eg. My mum knows. My dad doesn't. (They are seperated - my mum used to be married to an alcoholic, and my dad is a 'heavy drinker' who despises AA and alcoholics, as they're all obviously in cahoots with my deceased step-father lol).

Other people know I used to drink (rather a lot) and now I don't and am happier for it - occasionally someone will ask me about it because they'd like to stop as well, and then I might tell them more if it might help them. Because I have a good support network here, and in AA that level of communication with normies about it suits me fine.

least

I didn't tell anyone but my shrink and my close family. My kids knew I drank too much and were glad when I got sober. But I don't tell anyone else I'm in recovery. If asked, I just say I don't drink anymore.