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Cant seem to snap out of sadness

Old 06-12-2016, 09:50 PM
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Cant seem to snap out of sadness

I just can't seem to figure out why I am so down on myself these last several days. I cannot seem to focus or get myself snapped back together. I skipped the gym for about three days and ended up making myself feel worse. I am okay some moments and all of sudden hit with feeling low, depressed, sad, whatever you want to call it.

Not sure whats wrong with me. Everything is progressing okay, I am frustrated about the progress sometimes, but I accept it for what it is.

I just find myself spending my days trying to find work, thinking about people I probably shouldn't be thinking of(recent ex's), and just feeling hurt by everything all of a sudden. Maybe I have a deeper problem. My moods have just been all messed up these last few weeks.

I hope you're all having better days than I am.
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Old 06-12-2016, 10:21 PM
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Sounds like it could be a clinical depression. See a mental health professional ASAP. There is much they can do for depression.
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Old 06-12-2016, 11:52 PM
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These feelings may be coming from reasons you're not even conscious of. I went through something like this a couple of weeks ago and it seemed like everything just kept making it worse. I didn't feel safe..just wanted to hide. Still don't know what it was. Old stuff from somewhere for sure. I finally broke down and cried for quite awhile and after that all was fine. Growing pains?
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Old 06-13-2016, 03:30 AM
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I have become extremely dependent on exercise in sobriety to regulate my moods. I know it's a substitute addiction but at least it's relatively healthy.

If you've skipped the gym a few days in a row and are feeling lousy, I'd suggest forcing yourself back in there. It may help lift your mood.

I'm at the point that I'm climbing the walls if I go more than 24 hours without exercise. That's when I get myself wound up on fruitless ruminating and depressing thoughts.
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Old 06-13-2016, 08:35 AM
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I am also dealing with sadness. I am just over 3 weeks sober and have been miserable the whole time. I did start medication for depression but it takes 2 months to work. In the meantime I guess I just have to accept being melancholy for a while
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Old 06-13-2016, 08:46 AM
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Early sobriety is a roller coaster ride of emotions .

Sometimes the AV likes to try different assaults

Stick with it ,

if it persists go see a Dr , you can also have a read up on depression , most people seem to recommend eating well and exercise ..

Part of keeping sober for me was learning how to deal with resentments and the past in general ..

one thing i do know drinking aint the answer to anything

bestwishes, m
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Old 06-13-2016, 08:49 AM
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Rather than resisting the feelings, or letting your mind take over and spin stories about why you are feeling them, go toward the feelings.

Let yourself feel the sadness, grief, anger, whatever, as bodily sensations. Emotions are very physical. Let yourself yell, or cry, or hit a pillow, or do something that helps you express and release the trapped energy.

Journaling about your feelings helps too.

Good luck!
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Old 06-13-2016, 09:01 AM
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Hiya , sorry you feel this way . I just wanted to say I hope it lifts soon . I cant offer any advice really but your not alone with this , I have good and bad days with both anxiety and low mood . I was down this morning for hours ( don't know why) then went to a bike shop with my son then a coffee and now I feel brighter .
Were not drinking that's the main thing .
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Old 06-13-2016, 09:09 AM
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Originally Posted by Thomas59 View Post
I was down this morning for hours ( don't know why) then went to a bike shop with my son then a coffee and now I feel brighter .
Were not drinking that's the main thing .
I agree - I was ok this morning. A chain of events ensued that has me a nervous wreck and frantic feeling. It's definitely a roller coaster. But at least I'm not doing my usual numbing to make it all go away. I was noticing this weekend how my moods were extreme hopefulness to extreme despair. Sometimes when we get in the lows, the only thing we can do is not drink, keep busy .
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Old 06-13-2016, 09:16 AM
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How long have you felt like this have you spoken to a Dr ?
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Old 06-13-2016, 03:02 PM
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I haven't had health insurance or access to a doctor in over a year. Especially now, I just cannot afford it and I am not eligible for Medi-Cal(aka Medicaid). I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder and depression in 2010. Depression got better over the years, and then I started feeling all over the map sometimes. I last talked with my doctor about it over a year ago before the last lay off(which is when I lost my insurance). Lately I have had days where I feel really good about life and things are good, and then I have days or sometimes a couple of weeks where I just feel off or not all that well.

Today I feel okay, but I don't know what tomorrow is going to feel like.

When I last talked to my doctor I was referred to a psychiatrist who wanted to sit there and tell me I am bipolar without even trying to understand or map out what I was feeling. I threw his prescription on the ground and told him where to go. I went back to my doctor and told him about what had happened and he wanted me to map out what I felt, but I havent been able to see him since. So right now I am just kind of stuck.

I dont want to believe I am depressed, bipolar, or any of that stuff. I dont think most doctors really understand it anyway. My ex, former marine vet., went in for anxiety when we were together and got scripted depakote for bipolar disorder. He wasnt bipolar, but the meds made him that way and it destroyed our relationship.

The last time I even tried antidepressants I had a seizure and had to stop. I dont trust them, I wont go back on them, and I certainly dont trust head doctors who are probably psychotic and crazier than me.
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Old 06-13-2016, 03:05 PM
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I am sorry I wrote all this here. Quite honestly I think I dont belong here sometimes. I appreciate you all hearing me out and being of support. I just dont want to bother anyone anymore.
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Old 06-13-2016, 03:27 PM
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If you were diagnosed with depression... it's very possible you're dealing with it again / still.

It can often be something we deal with in varying degrees for large stretches of life.... sometimes worse than others.

Recovery is a time when we've taken away our self-medication, we come back to 'reality' and we start having to face our own emotions. At the same time, there are physical changes and psychological changes afoot that rock us. It's a dynamic mixed bag, well-primed for sadness, melancholy, depression.

I found myself struggling with it, too.... for much of year one and then in the winter's going into year 2 and 3 as Seasonal Affective Disorder began to plague me. I guess I'd always drank and drugged it away.

Keep working recovery, keep getting exercise, get to the ocean!! OH how I miss the healing, spiritual, restorative power of the beach. Those sunsets at Oxnard Shores. Surfing from the Shores to Rincon and every point between. The sea alone can help us reconnect with our soul..... head up into the Los Padres and do some day hiking in those gorgeous mountains. One thing you have going for you is a phenomenal natural surrounding and nature has a great deal of power to support our recovery and the deepening of our lives in general. Use that as a force in your recovery.

Hang in there man, it's going to get better.

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Old 06-13-2016, 03:57 PM
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Originally Posted by soberaccountant View Post
I am sorry I wrote all this here. Quite honestly I think I dont belong here sometimes. I appreciate you all hearing me out and being of support. I just dont want to bother anyone anymore.
You aren't bothering anyone. We are here to support each other, it's what makes SR the great place it is.
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Old 06-13-2016, 04:34 PM
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You're not a bother! I agree with the person who suggested you keep a journal. Sometimes it helps just to get it out -- stream of consciousness. Sometimes I find that writing about it helps me get a better understanding of what's wrong.

Try bergamot - an essential oil. It has a citrus scent, and it's uplifting for depression. I put a couple of drops on a cotton ball and keep it on my desk at work. No one notices, but the scent helps me.

Or try burning sage. It's inexpensive... about $6 at a store that sells crystals, etc. Might be cheaper in other areas (I'm very close to NY City).

I also listen to meditative music. Free on youtube.

Please take care of yourself :-)
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Old 06-13-2016, 04:42 PM
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Hey there, are there any clinics around you that have a sliding fee scale? Maybe you could afford it that way?
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Old 06-13-2016, 09:57 PM
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....just find myself spending my days trying to find work, thinking about people I probably shouldn't be thinking of(recent ex's), and just feeling hurt by everything all of a sudden. Maybe I have a deeper problem. My moods have just been all messed up these last few weeks....

Sounds like you've been letting resentments and self-pity creep in. They are dubious luxuries for us in recovery. I'd suggest starting with finding some way to be dealing with those, either through a counsellor, or a recovery program. Have you tried the 12-step approach? That gave me so much insight into my own resentments, fear, and self-pity, and how to go about removing them. I wouldn't be without my program of recovery at all.
When we get realky stuck in that place of resentment and self pity it can really build up fast. I think of it like a vortex. At times it just seemed too hard to even try to get out of, and then I'd just kind of give up on other stuff that made me feel better (possibly like you and the gym? I dunno). The thing is, I CAN get out of it, but it entails me being very firm with myself about whether or not I want to feel better, before I can do the necessary Acceptance and Letting Go, that dropping resentments entails, and the necessary gratitude work, and helping others that is necessary to empty my self-pity pool.
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