LadyBlue0527

Sounds like you and I are in somewhat the same circumstance these days. I feel for you though as my HR department is working through this with me.

Your last post sounds like you've given up on the company. Will you be able to find employment under these circumstances?

Positive thoughts your way today. I hope it goes well and that you work with them on this. If you're actively in treatment that should help.

ardy

that is so true 99% of the companies around have support items and have to for lots of problems.. and 90% of its free..
Prayers and hugs from a little corner of work that I thought would drive me to drink again.. love ardy

Behappy1

No, not given up on them at all. I am a damn good employee, have always received the highest on performance reviews, well liked in the field, highly experienced. Somewhat underpaid and definitely not working at my education level. 2 years ago I had other companies offering to high me away from where I am at. I'm very loyal and don't care for change so I stayed.

If I could excel this much with a company and do it while drinking - the possibilities of what are out there while I am sober have the potential to be so much more.

Normally in a situation like this, I'd be filled with fear, angst, panic. I'd be pacing, not sleeping and couldn't think straight. I'm pulling my tools out and praying for a good outcome, but also knowing that I will be ok. I made a HUGE mistake. I KNOW that I did. I'm owning up to it the best that I can. No way around this mess, the only way is through it. Thank you again for reading and for your kind words. I do appreciate it.

As far as the mugshot - the jerks. These companies want you to pay big bucks to remove them from their website and search engines. Once you do that, they just put them up on a sister site and it's never ending. It's illegal in some states to do this. Not in mine. I do not want to start the rat race of paying thousands of dollars to remove these. Not sure what else I can do.

kittycat3

Do NOT pay.

Write your senators and congress people to tell them of this nasty behavior and ask for their assistance.
I even wrote the ACLU.

Has your case been settled yet? If you are not charged my understanding is they'll remove it.

It's despicable, but turn your negative energy into a positive and write your representatives to try to create change. Note, this situation is made possible because cities and counties pay SW developers to put this stuff online that can easily be queried by these nefarious mug shot website losers. So it's definitely in their area of concern.

You can also file a report w Google to refrain from returning these sites in their search results. As I understand it some of the search engines already have removed these slimy sites from their search engines. I'm not up to speed on the latest in this area...

And stay sober so this never happens again!
Eventually it will fall into ancient history.

Behappy1

Thank you Kittycat! I agree, this mugshot is so very humiliating. If I didn't have my entire world turned upside down, I could deal with it. But I cannot right now. I did file a removal report with Google, it is my understanding that they will remove it, but other search engines will not.

It is peppered with other pictures, articles of all of my success. So shameful.

Well, I"m meeting with the supervisors here in a few. HR never did call me back or respond to anything that I sent them yesterday. IDK if that's a good thing or a bad thing. I am going in holding my head as high as I can and will not release or sign anything until I at least get the chance to have HR hear my side and not just a police report.

Thank you all for your continued prayers. Ironically, this is making me stronger in what I need to do to not drink. Thank you SR!

Rar

I'm thinking of you Behappy. Praying for a good outcome. ((HUGS))

Behappy1

Not a good outcome at all. Thank you SR for all of your help and input in this matter. HR never responded, called me back or anything. I'm not quite sure this is legal. I'm more pissed off than anything. First and foremost it is MY fault. But I gave my ALL to this company and in the end it didn't matter. I had letters from the court, doctors, therapists of the treatment that I'd went through to better myself yada yada yada.

I'll be ok and will land on my feet. I hope this thread doesn't sound pompous or entitled. Not meant to come across like that at all. Initially the blame lies with ME. But this company did not stand behind me and sure kicked my a$$ when I was down and needed the support more than ever.

Thank you again guys. For the newcomers reading this thread? DO NOT think this cannot happen to you. It can. I have 1 speeding ticket in 29 years of driving. I was moving a friend to college in a truck that was not mine. I was driving, tires were bigger/smaller or whatever and the odometer wasn't right. I thought I was going 55. I have virtually zero traffic violations prior to this . It can happen. Stop, get the help that you can while you can.

Behappy1

Another thing that I will say to those who are still waffling with drinking. I did that MANY, MANY times. No big deal, it will click one of these days, I can do this, I can't do this, I'll start Monday, I'll start the first of the month. $hit just got real for me. I had no CHOICE in the outcome after the actions of a DUI. If I am honest, I do not remember even getting in to the car to drive that night. That is a scary thing. I am thankful and grateful that my situation is not worse. Stop drinking while the choice is YOURS.

kittycat3

So what happened?

Behappy1

I am unemployed. My immediate supervisors, who know me were 100% to bat for me. I however am a field employee. HQ is in Des Moines, Iowa. They do not know me personally but by a number, my production reports, a headshot for the company directory and my paycheck amount. Fired for the first time in my life.

And I was set to be a supervisor very soon. All lost because of alcohol.

Anna

I'm sorry you're going through this. I'm sorry that your mugshot was put onto the internet and, though I'm sure it's legal to do, it hardly seems helpful.

I'm sorry that you lost your job. Hold your head up and remember that yes, you made a mistake, but you are not a bad person. You can get through this and hopefully end up in a better situation.

JD

I'm not sure what they did is legal either. The vehicle you were driving wasn't theirs? Did you sign an employment contact which would address a DUI situation or did they have an employee handbook that would? You could contact an attorney but that may be a lose lose proposition for both parties. I'm not sure I'd want to stay working for the company under those circumstances even if you won.

Behappy1

I agree 200%. This company was bought out by the company I work for. I had to put out many, many fires with this merger. I fought for this company, stood up for this company , put my name behind this company. In the end, it didn't matter. Corporate BS. I GET that I"m a risk, but the stress imposed was ridiculous.

In the end, it's my fault. I chose alcohol to shut down from this chaos and numb my mind. In the end it's my fault.

Behappy1

Never really felt more alone than this! Good luck to all the newbies trying. BTDT

Venecia

It's understandable to be hurting right now and feel alone. You're not alone. There's a world of support here to help you get through this difficult time.

Tomorrow is a new day. Hold on tight to your sobriety. You're going to be OK.

Delilah1

I'm sorry Behappy, that really does suck. You sound like a very intelligent person, and I am sure many companies are going to jump at the chance to have you work for them. You may need to disclose the DUI on applications, it depends on the wording of the question. My husband lost his job last year and had to disclose a DUI from 2002. It didn't stop him from getting the job, but it would have if he didn't disclose it. There is some sort of code of conduct or ethics.

Take a deep breath, get some rest, and move on to something even better!

MythOfSisyphus

I'm sorry you got a raw deal, Behappy. But as you said, I expect you'll be fine. Stick with the sobriety and things will work out.

kittycat3

I'm sorry too. Not like I know details, but don't take this personally (hard not to I'm sure.). There is a policy and it was violated (Right?) Policy is there for a reason (insurance, legal, etc.). HRs primary function is to protect the company, not the employee.

You can rise above this. You're learning a lesson and you have more reason to stay solid in sobriety. I have disclosed my DWI to multiple companies and it has never resulted in a no hire. Sad as it is to say, a DWI is not that unusual, and if companies made rules against hiring employees with DWIs they would be eliminating a large candidate pool. This may be different if your chosen career involves driving, but I have no doubt you can rise above this if you want to. You might find an even more amazing job and be glad for the shakeup!

Hugs beHappy, I know you got this

LadyBlue0527

Behappy1. First, a big, huge, virtual hug because I know how you feel, I've been there.

It really sucks doesn't it? All the good that you've done gets diminished by one eff up? I started with the company I was fired from in 2006. They had 4 clients. I worked endless days and nights fir 6 years helping them to build to over 60 clients. I think my record was a 19 hour work day. All the clients loved me because I took care of them. We won clients based alone on the support that I provided. I never had an HR issue, not once. On time every day, well organized, clients happy, worked my fingers to the bone for them. Then, I sent the proverbial drunken email and was fired on the date of my 6 year anniversary.

It's the day that you realize that we are truly just a number, every single one of us expendable no matter how great we think we are. So, these days, I continue to put my all into my work but not with the expectation of what others think of me but how I feel about myself.

On to the important stuff. I can feel you beating yourself up right now. I feel it because I've live it and now, I am living it again. Try to stop because you can't change what's happened. You're not a bad person, alcohol just leads us to make poor decisions. Try to keep that in mind. For now, what will be will be and no amount of beating yourself up is going to help. This is a hard lesson but much positive is going to come from it.

Although it's hard to see there will be a day in the future when all of this has passed and you're back on top of things. I promise.

chrcarlson

Behappy1 I wouldn't spend too much time bemoaning my fate. Sounds like you have some time on your hands to look for another job. I hope it's a better one. Looking for a job 8 hours a day will burn you out quickly. Spend a few hours on it and then go do something you enjoy. I've had several bouts with unemployment and it can be semi-enjoyable.

Best Wishes