D122y

This was the topic of my 7th AA meeting in my nearly 13 months clean.

Generally, until we are honest, step 4, w our sponsor we will struggle w sobriety. Never had a sponser yet, not saying that I won't ever have one.

My honest reason why I drank was because drinking was a party. We did it to have fun and to mourn. I did it to unwind. Now clean, I have fun, mourn, and unwind other ways.

I was uneducated on the effects of booze. I didnt drink because i resented my parents for not taking care of my as a child. I resented them, but I forgave them already.

I drank because I didn't know what was up w booze. I ended up a drunken addicted fat mess.

Now clean i know booze is not the answer. It was the majority of the problem.

Now clean, I don't obsess over my past mistakes. I obsess over things that are not in my control. I work hard to let God handle those areas.

Alcoholis poison. Don't believe the hype.

That is all. Since I didn't share at the meeting, I share now.

Beep beep..time is up...

entropy1964

Hey D

13 months is huge. Curious, why all this time in AA and no sponsor or steps?

AdelineRose

I am not part of AA or NA but I think being honest with yourself is the big turning point in when recovery truly starts. As addicts we lied to ourselves to keep drinking and using, and until we truly admit to ourselves why we do what we do, what we need to do to change, and admit to our mistakes and shortcomings then we will stay stagnant in our sobriety and not move closer towards true recovery.

Thank you for sharing, sounds like you are moving in the right direction

waywardson8260

Yes, alcohol is poison. Nothing good comes from it.

D122y

I figure you are active in AA?

How long w AA and how often do you go to meetings? Can you offer some advice about it to me please?

I have only been to a few meetings in my 13 clean months. All my time in recovery has been here in SR. When I feel the need to vent or get some strength, I come here.

My MO is to chime in on needy threads. I pray a lot too. So far it works.

AA is part of my recovery. The f2f is real. I see that the accountability w a sponsor is a major deal in staying sober.

But, i have heard stories of sponsers firing their sponsees for not working the steps correctly or for being weak or whatever...?

Technology is what saved my life. Google and SR.

I was on a highway to hell.

If not for SR and Google. I was going down.

entropy1964

Hey there

So AA is part of your recovery but you've only been to a few meetings? So the big book is your focus not the fellowship? Just trying to understand .

I am back at AA this time around. I don't have a sponsor yet. I misunderstood your original post because I thought you had been attending meetings for 13 months with no sponsor. I would say if you want to work the steps it's probably most effective with a sponsor.

To me a sponsor is a person that has been through the steps and can be a guide for me as I go through them. The book outlines how the steps are to be done and it's pretty straight forward. They don't have to be done perfectly, whatever that is, just to the best of your ability at the time you are doing them. I don't work for my sponsor so I can't be fired . Certainly if the duo is a bad mix then either party can call it off. It's good to get to know folks a bit before jumping in....go to coffee, have some phone conversations. But the person doesn't have to be my bestie or anything. They just have to have what I want and be willing to share what was given to them. I wouldn't stress about it. But if you have a fellowship you like and plan on being a part of it, I would say a sponsor is a natural part of the process when you're ready.

D122y

If I can keep myself sober, w out turning into an unhappy person, I will try to continue on my current path.

Meetings every few months or more as needed to see folks like me f2f. So far it seems to work for me. My AV is quelled fairly well lately.

I have been more active here and attended 2 meetings this month. My anxiety is easing up so I figure my AV will start to ramp up.

I have been periodically tempted into having a drink....just to try it out...but I know it will end up horrible. who needs that.

My AV acts up when things go right or wrong. Since I have been well trained, thanks to SR, I can side step the urge.

Whatever it takes to stay clean.