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Old 06-01-2016, 11:10 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Figured I'd try and find something to keep me accountable, and using this thread as a daily check-in and journal exercise could help

So today is day 3. How am I feeling? Ugh - lazy! And sleep deprived. I've been late the last 3 days to work because I just cannot force myself out of bed.

I'm overwhelmed at work right now - just feel like I have way too much going on and too many tasks pulling me in a million different directions.

Last night I got home from work and my whole plan was YES - RELAX - stay in bed and read recovery literature and have a good early sleep so I can actually get up on TIME the next day.

Read 1 chapter of the NA book, then woke up 2 hours later at 8 p.m. Basically went back to sleep for the rest of the night. Oh how productive! And my pets were so impressed with me for not giving them any attention all evening/night.... I'm sure.

It sounds like I'm being kinda negative right now. I guess I am. Maybe my body needed rest to recover from my last relapse - and it is what it is. I do feel healthier today, and I plan to hit a meeting tonight at 8 p.m.

I'm still lacking motivation. Whenever I come back from a relapse I feel like a deer on shaky legs and unable to trust myself to ever get sober - feel scared to even get my hopes up for a minute.

I need to find some daily rituals (starting with this thread) to keep me on the recovery track.

Will post again tomorrow.

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Old 06-01-2016, 11:41 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Congratulations on day 3 great idea starting an accountability thread for yourself
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Old 06-01-2016, 12:19 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Insomnia was always my problem in early recovery rather than too much sleep. Either way it's not much fun

Congratulations on day 3
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Old 06-01-2016, 12:38 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Insomnia is normally my biggest problem too!! But this time my body just wants sleep. Usually a couple days I'll just sleep all day and then anxiety and insomnia kicks in like mad.

It's also probably because I have detox meds from my doc (just a very very small dosage of clonozapem) to help me sleep and get through withdrawal.
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Old 06-01-2016, 12:41 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Day 3 is great. And a thread to post in daily is a great idea.

Rituals are kind of my thing, so yes they work....for me anyway.

Look forward to reading your daily journey
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Old 06-01-2016, 04:11 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Day 3 is great and it's okay to be a bit shaky. You are doing great and each day will be better. I'm glad you're taking care of yourself and making new rituals is a great idea. That's something that really helped me.
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Old 06-02-2016, 01:42 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Alright. Checking in for daily accountability. Feels good already. 

I’m doing alright today. Couldn't get to sleep last night, but then once I eventually was asleep I think I didn't wake up once until it was time to get up for work!!

The work day is DRAGGING and I’m dreading the fact that I agreed to go to this magic show thingy with a colleague tonight. UGH – fun – right??? All I want to do is sleep.

Still depressed I guess. Probably will be for a while. I’m sure I’ll have some good laughs and appreciate the show while I’m there.

It’s just getting myself places that seems to be the hard part. Lack of motivation.

That being said, I did go to a meeting on my lunch break today and it was good! Gave me some motivation. Lots of people “coming back” and talking about relapsing before they found sobriety. Gave me some hope.

Anyways, going to browse the forums for a bit I suppose!
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Old 06-02-2016, 02:37 PM   #8 (permalink)
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So day 4 right? You sound like you're doing great. Have fun tonight!
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Old 06-03-2016, 10:01 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Daily check in. Day 5 - oooh it's Friday.

Yesterday I was having a stressful day. I was finding myself wrapped up in loads of self-pity and resentment, jealousy, all these crappy emotions that I didn't want to be feeling but couldn't seem to get out of. I called my sponsor at work and had a bit of a chat and felt better. Then I went to this naked magic show with a colleague lol and I drank coffee she had tea.

I was exhausted. I just want a day of sleep! Thank god it's the weekend tomorrow.

I'm looking at booking a trip soon and the thought of sober travel still boggles my mind. I'm thinking Europe of Asia. I tried finding sober tours on the internet but there isn't much out there. Lots of cruises, but I have no interest in that.

Happy 24 everyone.
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Old 06-05-2016, 01:46 AM   #10 (permalink)
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How are you doing MissNewLife? I hope you are well.

Weekends can be hard
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Old 06-05-2016, 05:52 AM   #11 (permalink)
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A naked Magic Show? Yikes. That sounds interesting...

If you're looking for a 'sober' type of holiday what about a retreat? Tibet?
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