High bottom alcoholics
 

Just came upon this term and it describes me Ive never had a DUI always (almost always) never missed work never bad to my wife daughter or grandaughter.But alcohol became my life.Shared with a workmate last week that I used to dread vacation time as I would drink every day.He has worked with me for 10 years and said he would never have guessed I had a drink problem.I have sat with this guy on break drinking vodka and orange from my flask.He said cant you just have one and I told him the willpower it takes to have one is impossible try the cravings when your willpower is weakened by drink.The cravings subside in time but one drink and I am done.My life is so much nicer wthout it.Thankful to allat SR for all the support

I kind of dislike that term. The first time I got sober I was on the higher end of the "the bottom".....but after I relapsed, I hit a new bottom, still I guess considered not the lowest bottom one could hit, but low enough for me to know that if I ever drink again, the next one will be even lower.

Alcoholism is progressive so generally bottom's get lower and lower. I also think that 'bottom' is very individual....I had to get pretty good and destroyed emotionally and spiritually to get my thinking back in line. I could quit drinking for months....but my thinking has been way off base for a couple of years.

I have never had the typical 'consequences' from my drinking. Nothing legal, nothing financial, no broken marriages (although a broken relationship...but that was a blessing actually), no serious physical issues (except,uh my, er brain....is...slow), no accidents, no abusive behavior (crazy? yes). I have a home, 2 cars, a great kid, cool animals, I'm healthy and fit. But I am a very low bottom drunk because I'm destroyed spiritually. Ok that was very wordy. Oops.

I wish my bottom was higher. :)

The first time I went to detox about 10 years ago I remember being slightly smug about having a good job and such. The intake person just looked at me and said imagine how far you could go sober. I wish I had listened then because my actual bottom was much much lower.

Yup, just experienced what the rock bottom of a rock bottom is. Everything has happened just like I've read on this board and heard in meetings. Each time you go back out the end result is worse than the last. I can't even imagine, nor do I have to thankfully, what my next time would be. I thought because this last time I was ok for a while that it was untrue. I soon began to see the writing on the wall, it was progressing and far worse than it had in prior times. Still, I refused to see it. Then, I rolled the dice one too many times and now, well, I'm going to pay.

I would take back every single drink I took this last time if I could have seen what was coming. All it would have taken was to continue saying no. As hard as that word is it's a hell of a lot easier than what I'm dealing with now.

I'm glad you are sober too grandpa. When we choose to quit is a very individual thing and I think it's fantastic when you can do so before the consequences are really bad.

I dislike the term "bottom" as well no matter how its used ( high or low ) because it's impossible to define.

As I have written here before, I needed to ride the ole' elevator almost to the bottom for me to stop the nonsense of benzos and booze. Lost good job, lost license, attempted suicide, children and GRANDCHILDREN so sad and HURT, health declined, self respect gone, husband disgusted, public fool of myself in a small town, But, at 60 I am rising out of the muck. Thank you all for listening and being here. It means so much!!!! Namaste

I have a neighbor who runs a company that has 70 employees and turns about 6 million in revenue per year, he drinks beer for breakfast and its vodka from Thursday night through Sunday afternoon. He my age and looks 75 years old. He's a super nice guy, but he's not long for this world at the rate he is going.

Worse is his children are following in his footsteps. Some people hide their alcoholism very well.

I didn't get very lucky in that department, I can have two drinks and anyone that knows me will say "have you been drinking?" I'm a dead giveaway.

I used to be a high bottom alcoholic for years. But it doesn't last. Slowly you lose everything.
I'm grateful that I'm in recovery so things don't get worse. Because they can!!

Good stuff!

All I lost was my self respect and the respect of my kids... and that was too much. :(

I also didn't face any huge external consequences for my drinking. I remember having this conversation with a friend in treatment - we both MARVELLED at how we were fortunate enough to 'get away with' our bad behaviours. And I don't mean that we were smirking about it like children who had just shoplifted. Rather, we were truly gobsmacked.

So I don't pat myself on the back for it, because I feel in my case it was a matter of luck. There were so many times I could've lost my license, my job, my son, my relationships, etc.

My bottom was that I was emotionally and spiritually bankrupt.

High Bottom.... Low Bottom.... Rock Bottom....

The Bottom line is that the bottom is you're DEAD.

Or.....

It's wherever you CHOOSE it to be.

Someone's bottom is always higher. Unless you're dead - someone's bottom is always lower.

You can ride the elevator as far into bleakness and despair as you want.


Or.....


You can decide to hit the 'up' button and head back to the light of the surface, and beyond into joy.


It's all. Up. To. YOU.

:grouphug:

I disagree with the term high bottom. I don't base a "bottom" by what happens to you outside (lost jobs, DUIs, fist fights, divorces). I think we all, those of us who decide to get sober, have a similar experience. I have never met anyone in the halls of AA who didn't want to just lay down and die by the time they walked through the doors. Life was just too painful to go on living the way I was. It wasn't about the jobs, the courts, the relationships etc. It was about how I felt inside...so broken and hopeless. That's a bottom...feeling like you want to die because you just cannot go on living like this anymore. It's pretty universal among people in recovery. I hope I never forget how I felt when I crawled through the doors of AA and asked for help.

I have never heard of the term " high bottom" only "Fat Bottom" :c031:

Well I have that covered too lolol

Lol, Fat Bottom girls rock.....:You_Rock_

I don't believe the desire to change is conditionally linked nor directly correlative to negative consequences. It can be the larger factor in the case of addiction and quitting the habit, and oftentimes is, but it doesn't have to be.

There are a few models or theories of behavior change. Prochaska comes to mind. There are also some recent books on habit change that come to mind (Duhigg). I've read a few of them. Lots of takeaways... but one thing to remember is that the desire to end or minimize negative consequences is only one variable.

One sneaky aspect of the AV is to use justifications such as 'I'm still getting things done' or 'I'm highly functional' or 'There are others much worse off than me' in order to prop up the addiction.