Relationship breaking down
 

Girlfriend stayed at her mums for the week, came back, we went to a gig and then the next day she tells me she wants me to leave.

I joint own the house with her and I don't want to leave, it is her who has the issues with me. She has said I'm selfish and I don't go anywhere with her. I have said that I will make more of an effort but as far as things go, I haven't really done much else wrong.

I quit drinking to help improve things and it is not enough.

She is saying she wish she'd never met me and that she doesn't love me. It's like she's trying to drive me out of the house.

When my daughters mum and I broke up around 7 years ago I got told to leave the house then. This situation is bringing back painful memories of that and it feels history is repeating itself.

She has asked for space, I gave her it, she said I didn't try to get in touch when she was at her mums but she asked for space so I left her to it.

Although my daughter does not live with me and she pops up on the occasional Saturday to my house, we do spend most of the time out and about and with my family too. I really don't want her unsettled and having more uncertainty. It is my role to provide stability and having the house helps this.

I don't really know what to do guys, it seems more like her issue than mine

I'm sorry you are going through this, Stewy. I'm assuming you're in the UK. If so and if your name is on the title deed, I wouldn't have thought you need to go anywhere. If you own the property jointly and have a joint mortgage, it could get messy financially. If the relationship is really breaking down irretrievably, you need to come to an agreement with her about what to do with the mortgage (assuming there is one) and the property.

Legals aside, from a moral standpoint, I also don't see why you should be the one to leave.

Did you buy the house together?
Can you afford it on your own?

Would it be smarter to sell, take your share of equity and buy a smaller place?

Whatever the reason she wants out, you need to come to some sort of agreement about this--
I think a lawyer visit would be helpful for you to know your rights.

I'm really sorry Stewy but if she's done then you can only move forward.

Seems to me like the two of you have been having these issues for quite a long time now stewy. Have you ever seen a relationship counselor? Usually both sides are at fault at some level when relationships break down, and some level of compromise must be reached. It's also possible that it was just not meant to be and you may bees to prepare to part ways. But I think you could use some outside help as you seem do be stuck in this same rut for quite some time now.

Sorry this is happening know you have your sober brothers there for you all the way I agree with Scott's advice

She is here now back home, I honestly believe it is retrievable, I've bought her some flowers and tidied the house and said I'm here if she wants to maybe watch a film or something tonight.

Maybe you're right Scott the counselling may be an idea.

I still have a sense of dread though :( :( :(