Chickenlady06

I realized this morning that I have been making my bed each morning since day 1, I don't remember making a conscious decision to do so, I just started doing it. I haven't made my bed daily since I was a child and my mom made me do it. I never got the point of making my bed daily, so I'd only make it if I just washed sheets or if people were coming over. So, I'm wondering if anyone else is discovering they have odd or old healthy habits rising since becoming sober? 🤔

Bailey3

I find myself eating healthier and exercising. Yep, I make the bed daily too.

Aellyce

I like this bed making thing -- I think many of us find that it's best to change our habits and incorporate new good ones in baby steps

I always struggle a bit with routine, but I am quite an orderly person about my schedule, work, overall environment etc... I even tend to plan fun in advance, when sober. Not anal about it, it's a mix or organization and spontaneity that I like about myself. One clear pattern: my advance planning, organization and efficiency are some of the first things that go when I drink. And it disturbs me a lot when I am doing things erratically and make random decisions, change things all over the map etc. Getting back into sober order is always a very positive move not only for me but, for example, for other people who work with me as well. I am now working on making something like a more solid routine (repetitive small daily things) as well.

Chickenlady06

I thought it was so odd, I've tried being sober several times before, but this is the firsttime I've experienced something like this. I'm still in the eating my feelings stage of my recovery, but making better decisions each day. Exercise has been my saving grace though.

Chickenlady06

Aellyce, I too am a huge planner, even fun. It eases my anxiety to know what's coming up, I cannot stand when people just want to wing it. Hubs and I always get made fun of for being the first to arrive places and having everything planned.

entropy1964

I'm a bender drinker so I can go months or even years between benders (lately its only been months). I'm normally very organized and clean. But when I drink my house looks like a bomb hit it and a tornado. And my personal hygiene goes to pot too. In just a few days I look like a homeless person....insane eyes and all. Its day 7 for me now and not even a trace of what ended last Wednesday is present. Its a great thing.

jaybee1

I actually brush my teeth before going to bed, instead of passing out and forgetting\not bothering.

Behappy1

What a great thread. I can relate to all of this. I too am an organized person and usually very proactive and observant of my looks. That all goes to pot when drinking. I too look like a crazy eyed homeless person when on a bender.

I am also very anal about organization of my home, bills, meals, grocery lists, yard work etc. Sometimes it becomes overwhelming to keep up with all of that as a single mom with 2 active kids. That is a huge trigger for me when I get behind on things and feel the need to keep up with everything. It's almost to a perfection. I at times in the not so distant past just said screw it - I'll just check out. It's as if I NEED everything in it's place in my mind. I am really trying to let some of that go and just do what I can.

I am finding that early in sobriety I am concerned about diet, skin care, hair care etc. That's a good feeling. My struggle is that I can gain momentum with all of this and think "just one more time".

That one more time leads to 2-3 days of checking out (or longer) which equals everything out of control. My diet, looks, order of my home, yard, and LIFE. I cannot do "just one more time".

Great thread! Thanks for reading.

Dharma33

I've read somewhere on the forums that not making the bed is an 'alcoholic thing'!

It's certainly been true for me! I find in recovery that the simple act of making the bed in the morning sets the tone for a settled day. Great thread!

least

My best habit I've gotten back into since getting sober is walking my dogs every day. The exercise and fresh air is good for all of us. And I know I'm taking good care of them now.

madgirl

My 16 year old son never makes his bed, and he isn't an alcoholic

But yeah, when you wake up in the throes of a hangover or still sort of drunk from the night before and you have to rush around, get dressed and exert a tremendous amount of mental and physical energy just to seem normal, making the bed doesn't rate high on the list of priorities.

MissPerfumado

Habits in sobriety? My word, yes! All the little administrative tasks I used to put off at work get done first thing in the morning. My office and my home are both neat and tidy. Things get put away, laundry gets folded, the bed definitely gets made every morning. I exercise every day. My life feels calm and ordered inside and out, instead of trying to keep up appearances while living with chaos behind the scenes. I'm finally authentically me.

This thread reminded me of the University of Texas commencement address by Admiral McRaven about how making your bed changes your life. Google it. I recommend it.

Bailey3

I think the common thread between all of us that we're perfectionists.

Chickenlady06

These are all so great! I'm finding similar things with myself and my appearance. Simple things like wearing makeup and taking my contacts out at night. I have felt very put together the past few days. Keep the good habits rolling!

Chickenlady06

Yes! The laundry, I put away laundry this morning too! I usually just dig out of the basket till I have to wash it again. Now, hopefully I can get that sink full of dishes accomplished tonight. I was so bummed and tired last night that I iust went to bed so, it didn't get done....and too busy this morning making my bed and putting away laundry. 😄

Behappy1

I am finding that this is not a positive in my life although very true. I became wound so tight in perfectionism and order. Drinking was an escape from that regiment. Of course it always made things worse when I sobered up because the things that fell behind that were a molehill had turned into a mountain.

What do you all do to unwind your mind a bit and not be so perfectionistic? I do feel much better about getting things done/keeping up with every day life. But eventually I fall back into the "it is not enough routine thinking that I could be/need to be doing more".

overforty

I've always been neat and tidy - even with the worst hangover I would still make the bed, clean the house and have order.
But then the cupboards / wardrobe etc.. represented the chaos my life was!
I only had order on the facade!

I still haven't sorted out the unnecessary rubbish I'm hoarding in my cupboards etc... I need to take a day to get it done!
I have taken a lot of time off work recently and have been loving the calm I feel.
Usually I would be scrubbing the bathroom and cleaning everything in sight while feeling exhausted and sick literally!

I think the best new habit I've got is a little bit more calm has entered my life
I don't sweat the small stuff so much
X

ALinNS

Exercise would be #1, twice a day with my dog, it's great being sober and getting things done and doing things I like to do.

MissPerfumado

Behappy, all I can say is that perfectionism shouldn't come before sobriety. You have a lot on your plate - single mum, 2 kids, a household to look after and a job to hold down. You are a superhero. In comparison, I only have to look after myself - it's a whole different kettle of fish. I think you're right that you're going to have to let some stuff go if you feel like you're not keeping on top of everything.

I get it. As perfectionists, we all understand what it's like to impose high standards on ourselves, but not all of us have the huge responsibilities you do. But I think you're going to have to prioritise quite ruthlessly. To protect your sobriety.

MissPerfumado

I waited till I was a few weeks into sobriety and then took a couple of weekends to clean out and declutter properly, as a little project. It served a few purposes: filling a weekend instead of drinking, giving myself a sense of achievement, and getting the place tidy!