thomas11

Posting because I feel triggered. Kentucky Derby has always had a special place for me. I had a big crush on Donna Brothers (used to be Donna Barton) when I worked at our local horse racing track. I'd talk to her every day, now she's a big star. And I'm an out of work alcoholic. yay me.

Saskia

Jeff, I think you've worked too hard to go back down that road! Try thinking of all the things you're grateful for by being sober. You can do this.

doggonecarl

Romantizing the Derby is the same as romantizing alcohol. A trick of the addicted brain. Rein in those thoughts. Pun intended.

AdelineRose

" Out of work alcoholic"

For starters, you don't have to be an actively drinking alcoholic. You can choose to not drink at this moment and make that decision consistently for the rest of your life.

Once you aren't drinking, it becomes a lot easier to tackle the out of work part.

Don't be your own enemy, you already know drinking isn't the answer..otherwise you wouldn't have posted here in the first place.

You can do this! Find something to keep you busy or call someone who won't be drinking and do ANYTHING with them, just to keep you busy

Dharma33

You're a sober alcoholic today...and you will be glad of it tomorrow. Donna may be on TV, but you are carving a badass path yourself, which is recovering from addiction.

I'd be lying if I didn't say I would love one of those amazing hats, though.

How about turn off the TV, toss the ball around with the dog instead or take a walk? I'm glad you posted. ((((Jeff))))

Dharma33

double post.

Dee74

Self pity can be as addictive as any booze. C'mon man - snap out of it Jeff.

D

Hevyn

Hoping you got past feeling tempted, Jeff. There's nothing in it for us anymore.

courage2

It's your decision what you are. Are you a sober man of dignity and self-respect who can be trusted by his wife and friends? If that's what you are today, that's what you can be tonight, tomorrow, and the next day.

Don't drink.

MyShadow

Don't do it, and you wont regret it.

2muchpain

thomas11, you've been down this road many times. The situations are different, but the thoughts of whether to drink or not over them is the same. I think you're reaching out for help here before drinking is great, but if you're completely honest with yourself, you know where that one drink will lead.
Speaking for myself, if I decide to drink, it has nothing to do with anything going on. If I drink, it's because I want to drink. I don't see many things in life that are black or white, but this is definitely one of them. I hope you make the right choice. John

Delilah1

Hi Jeff,

Glad you posted instead of drinking. I had a fleeting thought of a glass of wine yesterday, the first in a while. I can tell you I am very glad today that I didn't act on it.

I love the Derby and horse racing as well. We watched the race, and Iost, but the day was alcohol free.

Post to let us know how you are doing.

❤️ Delilah

Hawkeye13

This

it's just a stupid horse race, and that's your AV talking in your ear again

Dime

Remind yourself of how bad it was, health, relations, finances and whatever was impacted. Remind yourself of how alcoholism only gets worse, it never gets better. Will you feel better tomorrow if you drink? It ain't worth it!!

EndGameNYC

All roads lead to Rome.

You're still lost in the mist of seeing the value of drinking, even at times the necessity to do so. In your OP, the suggestion is, again, that drinking would somehow enhance the experience of the Kentucky Derby, which echoes your previous comments around drinking during March Madness, college and professional football, camping and hunting. Many of your comments include some kind of tip-of-the-hat to drinking, sometimes reluctantly, and other times with vigor. It was "invaluable" to people of great achievement; necessary to close important business deals; or to improve upon some social activity. You also make it a point in many of your comments to remind us that you "only drank on weekends," suggesting some lingering doubt on your part.

If you drink, you don't get extra credit for posting about it in advance.

I don't know what it will take for you to engage in a more formal type of support beyond SR, but I hope it isn't another relapse.

soberclover

You know what you need to do. Drinking is never the good choice. Never.

Fluffer

I would consider being an out of work abstinent alcoholic as batting .500. And being an out of work drinking alcoholic as being 0 for 2.

thomas11

Sober, but kind of down and bummed out. Thanks everyone, but your energy would be better spent elsewhere.

Ariesagain

Honey, mint juleps are NASTY. As for the Derby...it's an awful lot of hoopla for something that lasts two whole minutes and smells like manure. Not worth drinking over, that's for sure.

Hang in there!

Anna

Jeff, you can get through this.