I drank :(((
 

So I failed. I drank yesterday and the day before. I drank a half pint and two n half beers and smoked a few cigarettes... I didn't get drunk or wasted but I regret doing it. I was starting to feel so great physically. I'm a little tired today but still overall feel good.. but I'm so disappointed in myself tho..

Do you think it's time to make a formal plan of some kind Toni? To be honest you can expect more of the same If you don't change something.

Do you know why? If you know why you can try to prevent it from happening again.

Learn from this x

well hey.... you outed yourself so you must want to make another choice.

DO you want to make another choice?

Posting here before you drank might have prevented a relapse, but perhaps that's why you didn't post. Once you decided to drink, you were determined to go through with it.

A difficult cycle. I hope you find the way out.

Falling off the sobriety bike means there is more work and understanding to do to achieve masterful sobriety.

Don't stay flat on your back in the road , get back up, get back on. there is a great sober life out there for the making :)

Bestwishes, m

As long as you want to drink more than you want to be sober, you will drink. :( I hope you can reverse that and come to want to be sober more than you want to drink. :)

If you intend to use SR to help in your sobriety, you should use it. Meaning reach out and post before you drink. I've done it a couple times and it saved my butt.

Hi Toni,

I'm glad you came right back on here. I agree with Thomas about posting on here. Yesterday as I was driving home from work the thought of having a glass of wine popped into my head, that hadn't happened for a while. I logged on and posted in my January class, and spent some time reading here, then I hung out with my kids, and after caught up on a few shows I had on DVR.

Today I am very happy I didn't drink, you can feel that way tomorrow. Scott asked about your plan, do you have a solid one in place?

Hi Toni

I'm sorry you drank but I'm glad you're back :)

Sometimes I think it takes more than just trying not to drink?

Maybe you need more support, or need to make more changes?

Have you considered something like AA or some other recovery group?

D

My trigger was a very nice beautiful day. I love sitting on the porch having a drink and smoke. It's just something about those nice days. I know I need to have a plan. Summer time is coming which means I need to plan nowwwww... but I didnt drink today

it happens. don't beat yourself up

i say move on... the mental anguish is enough to get you through these little slip ups. keep adding to your sober time... the counter doesn't restart. you are still sober today. you are getting better.
do you have hobby? exercise?

i drank and got beat up by my boyfriend. **** all that

you LOVED sitting on the porch having a drink and a smoke

now, it's almost like you know what the situation really is, so you don't love it anymore, in fact, it just makes you miserable

keep this experience in your mind... you DON'T love sitting on the porch and having a drink and a smoke. In fact, it ruined your weekend

this could be the summer where you learn all kinds of new things about yourself, and it won't be easy, but it might end up being the best summer you have had in a very long time

so, you dropped the ball- pick it up and move it forward. You don't have to leave it where it is.

Sorry buddy. Get back on your horse and this time Master him, not let him master you x

I used to fantasise about english country pubs in summer in the garden outside drinking beer .

I never actually got it together enough in my drinking career to actually do that , to far away when i couldn't drive .

During the early months of my sobriety the idea was floating about in my head tho' .

I imagined doing the exact same thing but with a lemonade , it held no appeal .. therefore i knew it was my addiction spinning me a story not reality .

You can go on your porch , smoke , you can have iced tea , you can have english style tea from a porcelain tea pot and cup, cream cakes , scones and jam . Do some oil painting or water colour painting as you sit , read a great book , listen to the radio .

Break the alcohol ritual , form a new healthy habit . Don't pine after what you can't have because thats what causes misery . Focus on what great new things you can do :)

Take care,
m