Corinne788

Hi there, I am sober a little over 2 months which isn't a long time but considering I drank every night for 7 Years its a long time for me!
Anyways I need some support I have done this cold turkey or without any help just decided one day to stop... but I have been dealing with a ton of anger, frustration,depression.. Crying for no reason.. I feel like I've been on auto pilot in my life for the last 7 years and I am waking up and truly not happy with where my life is..I am trying to stay strong but I have no real support in my life or anyone that can understand what exactly I feel like or what I mean by I feel like I just :woke up: everyone thinks I should just be happy that I am sober and things should just be easy now.. but they seem even more hard than when I was drinking everynight till I passed out.

Venecia

Hi, Corinne,

First, congrats on two months! That's a major accomplishment by any measure and one that I hope you're proud of.

I know where you're coming from. Like you, I got sober before joining SR two months later, having spent the better part of the previous 10 years on alcohol auto-pilot.

The first couple months aren't easy. One of the things alcohol does to us is puts us in kind of a permanent fuzzy state; we really aren't confronting realities or emotions. We're just getting through the day until we can pour the next drink.

In sobriety, we have to face life, the good, the bad and the in-between. But you know the good thing? We can take life on, rather than being in our fuzzy isolation, a state that prevents us from moving forward.

I know it's hard. But remember that alcoholism is progressive. Had you not gotten sober, it was only going to get worse. Think about it: If you could travel back in time for, say, 15 years, wouldn't you have been shocked at the rate of progression.

So it might be hard but it really could be worse. My counsel to you is get active in SR. This is a wonderful community, full of encouragement and wisdom.

And we've all been where you are now.

It gets better. It really gets better.

DaniBee

I know very well what you're feeling. 2 months is great! I still have my moments after 7 months, but I have built a support system. Have you considered AA
? That's been crucial for me. Good luck! As long as yoU don't pick up, you'll be fine.

ALinNS

Sometimes, at least in my case we need someone to talk to in order to get to a happy place in life, I have spent countless hours in counseling because I buried life experience in booze which made everything worse and took a lot from me because I was too stubborn and had high level careers that I never thought I needed help. Well I finally came to a point where enough was enough, reached out and thank god I did because I came out the other side and live a very happy life.

Wishing you the best
Andrew

MIRecovery

For me the beauty of AA is you are surrounded by people that know what it is like to be an alcoholic and know what early recovery is like.

You will find people in AA are the warmest, most non-judgmental, and fun loving people in the world.

The icing on the cake is they have a way for you to have a fantastic life without alcohol

Corinne788

Thank you for all of your responses! I am not really sure about how I would go about finding AA or even dealing with the anxious/anxiety feelings I have about walking into a room of strangers....It has been really hard to even admit I have a problem to myself... I find myself sometimes asking... was drinking that bad? is this really worth it? wasn't it so much easier to not have all these dang emotions? ... I as well with many people did use it to cover my emotions and get through the day on "auto-pilot" just counting down till I could drink again. I feel so overwhelmed just living day to day now that I don't even know where to start with finding help..... which is why I decided to join this site as a kinda first step...

least

I was about three months sober and still miserable. It was suggested that I start to practice gratitude each day. Every day find at least one thing to be thankful for. It became a good habit and forced me to focus on the positive more than on the negative.

Now I've got over six years and have never been happier. Gratitude changed my attitude.

oldsoul1122

I had periods of not drinking but the anxiety drove me right back. There was always a trigger. AA has given me ways of dealing with everyday life and a great support system. Everyone there had a first meeting and felt the same way. Bargaining with yourself about your drinking is common and being ambivalent. Was it really that bad? Yes, and it will get worse. AA meetings are listed online in most areas..I hope you can find one.

bluedog97

I'm right at two months too and know what you're going through! I seem to be confronting a lot of things I buried in years of drinking. It's awkward to say the least. I'm still testing out my recovery route, have been relying on SR as of late. I think checking out AA is a good idea as well. Keep it up, your success is encouraging to others!

NewJosh

I'm almost 5 months sober and I know EXACTLY how you feel. It's hard, especially when you drank for such a long time. It's like you're mourning the very thing that's trying to kill you. But, for me, it gets easier with time.

Every day it gets a little bit easier. Some very rare days I don't even think about alcohol.

There was no magic day for me where suddenly the grass seemed greener and the birds sang just for me. But I've found its a process and I'm learning how to live a little bit every day. And I'm facing it with a clear mind.

Stay strong and know that you are not alone.

Notimetoloose

Drinking ourselves to passing out every night is not worth anything...
Early sobriety can be tough; all is new and a lot of first for a long time, it is like eyes wide open and a little freaked out.
A lot has to do with our brain rewiring and healing. I like thinking about that!.
Change, even when it is for the better can be difficult.
It is great that you found SR, there is a ton of resources, people, and info to help you navigate early sobriety.
Congratulations on two months.

Hereandnow2

The thing that made a difference in my happiness factor was truly finding sober friends. I had none! Aa was where I found those friends and without them I would not be happy!

Dee74

Hi and welcome Corinne

I found join this community really helped me work through that fear, frustration anger and just strangeness of early recovery.

You'll find a lot of support and understanding here.
I'm glad you found us

D

StartingOverNW

Yes you do. Its right here.

Welcome to the forums

Corinne788

Thanks again to all of you!
I am going to look into AA and finding a local support group.. Knowing I am not alone in feeling this way that it CAN be done helps a lot just from the few responses from ya'll on here.

FormerWineGirl

Early sobriety is just plain hard, especially if you drank for years. But you have two months under your belt now. Two months down. That's huge! You will start reaping the rewards, just give yourself some more time. I'm glad you found this site, welcome.

LostLilly

Feeling like that today. Not everyday though. I go to AA most days, have a sponsor and have met some sober friends. The only requirement is the desire to stop drinking. I read, pray, think, remember the bad times and regrets, journal, try to practice honesty and kindness. I have good days and bad but so do most nonalcoholic people😊. Hang in there! People keep saying it gets easier so let's hope so!!

Lilly

Delilah1

Welcome Corinne, you will find lots of support on SR!

I am four months sober, and this site is my biggest support, especially the January class. You may want to join the March class, you will find others who are also at two months sobriety, and are dealing with some of the same things you are.

I know when I would drink part of the reason would be to escape from whatever little life drama might be going on at the moment. The life dramas are still there, and I have just had to learn different ways to handle them. Mindfulness has been great for me. It forces me to stay in the present rather than worrying about the past or future. I have not yet perfected this, but I am continuing to work on it!

Looking forward to seeing you on SR.

❤️ Delilah

uncorked

Hang in there Corinne! First of all, congratulations. Two months sober is a big deal!! But life doesn't suddenly become easy when you're sober -- especially newly so. You were a drinker for years, with all the habits, places, people, etc to go along with it. Now you're living a new and different lifestyle and it will take time to adjust. Emotions may be bubbling to the surface that you never had to deal with when you were drinking. For me, that was a good thing. My real emotions allowed me to look at my life with clear eyes (no, I really WASN'T happy in that relationship! ) and trust myself. I had just gotten out of rehab when I was 7 weeks sober and I remember feeling very fuzzy, weird, not myself. It does get better! Just hang in there and let time do its work. Find something other than drinking to look forward to, whether it's a tv show, a walk, a movie, a good book, tickets to a concert....whatever. I remember when my triplets were babies and I was going through severe post-partum depression, along with being completely overwhelmed. A mom who had survived triplet babyhood and toddlerhood told me to find just one thing a day to look forward to. Even if it's a good cup of coffee. I've used that advice a lot during tough times and especially now.

tomsteve

after the fog wore off of many years of intoxication, the angerreally surfaced. i had a LOT of learning of the causes and conditions of it and how to change me and my attitudes.
it was the program of AA that helped me learn about me-about what makes me tick and it took T.I.M.E. for everything to make sense and change to occur. T.I.M.E. and footwork.

i can still get comments from my family on the change. something would be going on and theyd have a flashback to something similar and how i blew my top yet now MOST things i just let slide by.

well worth all the frustrations of learning.
ive become addicted to peace,serinity, and self love.