MissPerfumado

We're all going to come at our recovery differently, as has been observed by others here. For me, realising I couldn't drink because I very likely have a genetic or physiological difference from "normal" drinkers was like a lightbulb going on for me. You used the word "empowering" - that's what it was. I like to have a good reason for the choices I make - it has to make sense to me. And not picking up a drink because I have a genetic problem with drinking is the most logical sensible reason in the world for me not to drink. Even writing it down now makes me feel powerful - and lucky to have realised it.

FormerWineGirl

I have a couple of thoughts here:

First, I think some people we know as "normal" drinkers aren't actually normal drinkers at all. We just assume they drink "normally".

Second, when we begin life, our bodies don't start out needing alcohol. Society tries to tell us that the "social norm" is to drink. To put poison into our bodies. My body rejects poison, yet I have the defect? The longer I am sober, the more I realize it's actually society's problem, not mine.

bluedog97

It's a fair question. If you look at someone who can drink one or two and walk away, they don't care they are drinking. When I drank, not only did I care is was my main focus/obsession.

Does that obsession make me defective? Maybe. But my goal in recovery is to be able to be around alcohol and not care that I'm not drinking, much like the non-alcoholic doesn't care that he is. That may be asking a lot, I don't know.

I think I got caught up in FOMO much more when I was younger. In my 20's and early 30's I was consumed by it.

madgirl

Thanks to all of you for your kind and thoughtful responses. As I mentioned earlier, I respect all paths to mental and physical health.

I will candidly admit that my perspective may be a bit skewed because of my extremely fundamentalist, religious background which has been very damaging to my sense of self worth, so I was wrestling with the idea that I am defective because this is the same idea I was fed from a young age (unless you pray this prayer and live exactly this way, you will go to hell for eternity because you have been born in sin and are inherently bad).

So coming from that background, when I read here that some of us are embarrassed in some way to say "no thanks, I don't drink" for fear of being judged, it makes me feel trapped and "defective". It'd be nice to actually feel PROUD of making a GOOD decision not to put an addictive, poisonous substance in your body instead of having to come up with some kind of an excuse.

I'm going to run with it, anyway. I don't want to see sobriety as a loss. So far, the only thing I've "lost" is sleep (dang insomnia!) and I'd like to see some lost weight (grrrr) but I have already gained more emotional stability, better looking skin, more motivation to complete tasks, nice mornings with no hangover or anxiety - etc.

Dave42001

Well said, Soberween!! Some people are allergic to peanut butter and shell fish..

I was in a meeting and I guy was talking and he said, "I'm allergic to alcohol, when I drink it I break out in handcuffs!" Everyone busted out laughing..