Calm vs. Drama
 

So, as I reflect on being sober 4 months today, I realize how calm and drama-less life can be. It's new for me. Growing up in my household was despairingly lonely, or riddled with my mom as a raging freak, or escaping to the garage to hang out with my dad, who was escaping my mom, or playing on my own, or getting bullied by the local kids in our neighborhood, or having fun with my sister, or being tormented by my sister (because my mom was a complete freak, and she still is today - so my sister was always stuck caring for me/us).

I've recently downsized my life by one dry drunk husband of 21+ years, one big fancy house I didn't want or need, and having to share my daughter (who thinks I've been lobotomized since the divorce so she hangs with her "daddy" most of the time - teenagers are fun stuff...whew!) and moved into a cute little home with low drama. Me and my cat most of the time. I recently started a little side business doing gardening and lawn care for other people, and I like it. I am a professional writer, but I am not keen on going back to the insane corporate American grind at this moment in my life.

I've immersed myself entirely into AA, my meetings, the Big Book, and my sponsor and I meet every week. I am on Step 3, "made a decision (not a wish, or a hope, a decision...yeah, important language of action there) to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God. I think I am still in the middle of Step 3, but gradually moving toward the end. It's not easy for this retired Catholic, recovering control freak, recovering "always being controlled by others" freak, and drunkard to say, "Hey, I don't have to rent space in my head for this problem. Give it to God. Enlist the help of a powerful ally...God."

That's all for now. GG1231

good stuff.
that decision i made meant i decided to turn my will and my life over......
and continue with the rest of the steps.
THAT'S how i had a spiritual awakening and discovered my HP

I say live and let live, if you don't like it I'll kill you. :lmao

The poll does not cover me.

Believed in God at an early age in Sunday school and still do.
Nothing to recover from.

MB

Hello! I'm the other Garden Gal! ������! I also love gardening and cats... and grew up with a dysfunctional catholic family upbringing! LOL Welcome to SR, it is a really wonderful place to be :)

I'm with Mountainmanbob on this one.

Ditto for me, although, with a twist :lmao

My family on both sides, for several generations, are members of a "religion" that I consider to be a cult.

When I was 8 or 9 yrs old, my mom let me go to a nondenominational church with a neighbor a few times and I found God there or rather He found me :c031:

And thank God, He has never let me go :grouphug:

My decision to hand everything over to a new employer was a bit like my decision to get a driving license. Making the decision, which took only a few seconds, did not get me my licence. I then had to learn to drive, learn the road code, sit a test, and then I got my license.

Much the same with my AA experience. The third step took only seconds, but then I had to remove the things that had been blocking me.

These included my opinionated head, my closed off heart, my defensive and defended body ( Richard Ruhr), my insane way of thinking, the haunting memories, the people I had hurt. Once I started on that, I began to feel the Power.

I was christened Anglican, did a couple of years at a church school, otherwise no formal religion. I can learn from all religions, and it mixes well with AA.

Congratulations on 4 months gardengirl1231