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A healing weekender April 29 part 1

Old 04-28-2016, 04:40 AM
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sorry for the long post, hope you didn't fall asleep if you read it...

well, accordion to the weather report, it's going to be raining good by 3PM (1500 for Brynn). So I better get out there and take care of things that require 'dry'. Still much planting to do all over the place. And I have to repair the area I dug out the trees two weekends ago...

oh, a howitzer
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Old 04-28-2016, 04:55 AM
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Great post, Brain. It echoes a lot of my feelings. I Dont have very many friends either, or so I thought. I'm finding now, though, that they are still out there, if I can get over my fear and reach out to them.

Thanks for asking, Ruby. When I woke up at midnight feeling really bad, I took a bunch of ibuprofen and then woke up a few hours later, completely soaked. So the fever broke. I'm happy that my sore throat is gone, so at least I know I'm not getting strep this time. I get it more frequently than most, and can get so sick I need to be hospitalized. It's not that. I think I'm just getting a cold. I just feel tired and a bit weak. I'll be ok.
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Old 04-28-2016, 04:55 AM
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In!
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Old 04-28-2016, 04:57 AM
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Spudgun

Great title for the thread Ken - I'm still healing from my childhood too

LB, that was a touching post - you are not the same man that appears on that bulletin
and I 'm sure there will be people out there who recognise that as the people on this thread do

Behan, that Meitheal sounds like it comes out of a great community

Congratulations on shotgun cardoon
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Old 04-28-2016, 04:58 AM
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I am done here in Downham Market - actually it doesn't look bad
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Old 04-28-2016, 05:06 AM
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A simple guy making his way
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Originally Posted by Fabela View Post
I have been desperate in my search for ways to heal my battered soul, and there have been times when I have thought that I would never heal at all. But here you have described exactly what I have been looking for for so long. Thank you, Ken.
I am so glad you found words that can express your thoughts. I wish you all the best in your healing lessons. Keep practicing!

Ken
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Old 04-28-2016, 05:08 AM
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A simple guy making his way
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Originally Posted by LBrain View Post
Healing… While working in the yard I get a lot of time to think. Recently (yesterday) I was going over my life a bit. And meditating on some things, and sometimes just being with the birds and experiencing ‘life’ outside. I’ve done a lot of damage in my time. And now that I have few real friends is a testament to how drinking altered my personality at times. I can’t change others nor can I change others opinions or experiences of me. Sure I can take the opportunities to make things right with people. But still it is up to them to forgive past behaviors. I know I tried and the only real thing I can do is live better and not make the same mistakes going forward. Living sober is all I can do now.
Knowing that I am doing my best now, for me, is enough to overcome the feelings of disappointment I have allowed my past to manifest in myself and others in me over time. I cannot dwell on the past, but occasionally use it as a reminder… I am still caught in a funk. Knowing that every job opportunity, in my field, that there is a nationwide bulletin on the internet if the person vetting candidates will find easily. It is on my mind a lot. All you have to do is “google” ‘LBrain’ and sure as *** it shows up.
Having worked a job that took up what seemed like 90% of my life, most of my social connections were with ‘work’ people. Work people have abandoned me – I am not good company to keep it seems. Now, the few friends I have are scattered or busy with their own lives. SR has become my social connection, and my solace.
Meitheal, is a good example of how SR has helped me the past couple years. Reading about other’s successes or how they are coping with life is inspiration for me. I was fortunate that I just decided to quit drinking and was able to do it. It was by no means easy. But I made a commitment to myself that I was never going to allow alcohol to affect my life ever again. If you don’t know, I lost my career due to an alcohol related event (the google reference above). In retrospect I am amazed I made it as far as I did. SR has broadened my outlook and I have learned much from the many who frequent these pages. And I count you all as my friends.
I sometimes ask for advice without really asking. Or I perused the forums and picked up a few tidbits of information that has helped me along the way.
You've all been a part of my healing process. Thanks everyone.
What an amazingly honest and moving share my friend.

Ken
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Old 04-28-2016, 05:39 AM
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I'm in. . . lots to do but glad to be here
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Old 04-28-2016, 05:47 AM
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Originally Posted by MLD51 View Post
Great post, Brain. It echoes a lot of my feelings. I Dont have very many friends either, or so I thought. I'm finding now, though, that they are still out there, if I can get over my fear and reach out to them.

Thanks for asking, Ruby. When I woke up at midnight feeling really bad, I took a bunch of ibuprofen and then woke up a few hours later, completely soaked. So the fever broke. I'm happy that my sore throat is gone, so at least I know I'm not getting strep this time. I get it more frequently than most, and can get so sick I need to be hospitalized. It's not that. I think I'm just getting a cold. I just feel tired and a bit weak. I'll be ok.
I don't suppose there is a good time to get a cold but day 1 of new job is definitely a bat time. Not long to the weekend

Ahh! Pub lunch with my clients - wasn't expecting that No problem in one respect as I have a longish drive home but it was a struggle as others were drinking. About to head home thank goodness
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Old 04-28-2016, 05:53 AM
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...holds the key
 
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I'm on board!

I'm in a hurry to get out the door but I did skim y'all's thoughtful and heartfelt posts. I'll really read them in a bit, but wanted to say how much I appreciate being on this journey of self discovery with all of you! You're the finest bunch of miscreants I know!

Glad you feel better Marty!
Xo
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Old 04-28-2016, 05:54 AM
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...holds the key
 
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Glad you made it Sao
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Old 04-28-2016, 05:54 AM
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...holds the key
 
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Hi hawkeye!
Xo
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Old 04-28-2016, 05:56 AM
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I'm in for the weekend, will post more later. Hope everyone has a great Thursday!
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Old 04-28-2016, 06:03 AM
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One Day At A Time
 
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I'm in! In the spirit of trying to keep up with the speed of this thread.... gotta get some wheels
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Old 04-28-2016, 06:04 AM
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In. The posts have been truly awesome. Actually took a look at my calendar and I am 90 days as of yesterday. Feeling blessed here.
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Old 04-28-2016, 06:18 AM
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Count me in for another sober weekend. Thanks for the thread, weasel. I'll give it more thought after a while, and after more coffee. healing is a big issue for me, one I'm always on a quest to figure out. There is a lot of work to do for me and I have the willingness but I haven't found the way. I still have a lot of baggage that I would love to release into the universe.
Ok....more coffee and a trip to the vet this morning. Rattlesnake vaccinations for my furry babies. (I should get one too!)
See all later.
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Old 04-28-2016, 06:36 AM
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Good morning everybody, afternoon or evening depending...

I'm in and thanks as always for the great intro Ken.

Awesome post LB.

Hope everybody has a great Thursday.
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Old 04-28-2016, 06:51 AM
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Congratulations on 90 days, Graced! It starts adding up. And we start healing.

Glad you're feeling slightly better Marty. It's a good thing that the weekend is almost here.

Sao, glad you made it through lunch. That's rough.

I'm chilled. It's not raining but it's wet. Cold and damp. I wish I had wool on today but I don't.
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Old 04-28-2016, 06:56 AM
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Good morning, all! I'm on the bus, wolfie can I sit next to you on the roof? I need some fresh air.

Everyone's posts this morning were so lovely to read. Such gentle tones of healing and support and sharing.

Thank you all for describing your lives to me on this corner of the Internet. For whatever reason, we all ended up here and I care about everyone a lot. I learn so much here.

I'm off to the coffee cupping shortly. We'll pick a few custom roasts for the restaurant. I haven't done this in several years and it's a fun way to spend a few hours.
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Old 04-28-2016, 07:22 AM
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Hey Hey Hey ,
Had a traveling day today to go pick up my computer ..

am home now so thought i'd read up on computer networks and their protocols , pretty dry stuff . half listened to the radio, so am bearing up .

will stop work in about 10 mins, will try and plan something super productive for tomorrow

lets get through , m
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